


Rich Kids Double B (au)

by kaaaiiiyooo



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Fluff, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-10-15 02:50:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 53,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17520770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaaaiiiyooo/pseuds/kaaaiiiyooo
Summary: "You can't find someone who doesn't want to be found."





	Rich Kids Double B (au)

**Author's Note:**

> Notes
> 
>  
> 
> \- ORIGINALLY A TWITTER AU SO SOME PARTS (photos and screencaps of fake texts and tweets) ARE MISSING (also posted in my twitter acct @kaaaiiiyooo131)  
> \- Pure fiction  
> \- Grammar isn’t perfect  
> \- Ignore timestamps  
> \- Hanbin just had his first anniversary as an artist when Bobby left  
> 

Hanbin looks out his window and sees Bobby’s car parked across his building. He takes a sweatshirt and runs outside his apartment. He presses the elevator button and struggles to put on his sweater. The elevator door opens and he gets in. He wears his sweater properly and waits until the lift reaches the ground floor. When the doors open, he hesitates to go out because he knows once he does, everything’s going to be real. His boyfriend of 3 years, the love of his life, was moving away leaving him behind. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to face all that. He first heard the news 2 weeks ago. He had thought of every possible way to stop Bobby from leaving but it was just inevitable. The day he has been avoiding finally came. 

He’s stuck. He can’t move. He’s unsure if he wants to move. The elevator door closes. He sits down at the corner and he begins to cry. He cries for a few minutes. He stands up. He knew Bobby hated seeing him cry so he turns around and looks at his reflection from mirror surrounding the elevator. He wipes away his tears and he breathes in and out. Once he’s composed, he presses the button for the doors to open. He steps out and he walks outside. He sees Bobby trying to call someone. He left his phone upstairs so it must be him he was calling. Bobby sees him from across the street. He looks at Bobby. Bobby gives him a faint smile. He does the same as he waits for the light to turn green. His heart breaks and he knows Bobby’s heart was breaking also. The lights turn green and he starts to cross the street. Bobby waits for him patiently.

As soon as he reaches Bobby, Bobby doesn’t waste a second. He grabs him and hugs him as tight as he can. Hanbin wraps his arms around Bobby’s neck and hugs him with all his might too. They stay under the lamp post hugging each other for it will be the last time in a while. Bobby kisses the side of Hanbin’s head. Hanbin tightens his hug. He doesn’t want to let go. He wishes he didn’t have to let go. Bobby takes Hanbin’s face in both his hands. Hanbin wraps his arms around Bobby waist. Bobby looks him in the eye. Hanbin doesn’t because he knows he’s going to start crying once he does. “Look at me.” Bobby tells Hanbin. Hanbin starts crying. Bobby lifts his head up. He wipes away Hanbin’s tears with his thumb. He clears his throat. “We’re going to be fine, babe. I promise. Okay?” Hanbin, still crying, nods.

“I’m a phone call away. Call me anytime. Call me when you’re happy, when you’re sad, when you miss me, when you hate me. Okay?” Hanbin nods. “Take care of yourself. Never forget to eat and shower.” Hanbin laughs in between tears. “Don’t tire yourself too much during practice okay?” Hanbin nods. “I’ll be cheering for you from miles away. I am so proud of you baby. You have no idea. I’d kill to be with you every step of the way. I’m sorry I can’t. I am so so sorry. I am so sorry.” Hanbin cries a little stronger. Bobby wipes away Hanbin’s tears and kisses his forehead. He hugs him tight again and doesn’t let go for a while. They stay like that for a couple more minutes. 

Later that morning

Bobby’s family’s flight left a few hours earlier than his. Jinhwan, Junhoe, Yunhyeong and Chanwoo was there to send him off with Hanbin. They bid their farewells and they all hug each other one last time. They left promises to visit each other every chance they get. Yunhyeong was crying the most. Even more than Hanbin. Bobby’s flight was calling for the final boarding. “I have to go.” Bobby says trying his best not to cry. The 6 of them hug each other and Bobby gives Hanbin one last tight hug. “Don’t look back okay?” Hanbin says. Bobby scans Hanbin’s face and gives him a kiss on the lips. “I won’t.” Bobby turns around and walks towards the boarding gates. He walks until his friends couldn’t see him anymore. And as promised, he doesn’t look back.

*a day after*

Bobby’s family was the headlines of all newspaper and news channels. His father’s was charged for embezzlement. Sources were saying that he took all the money for his sake but there were also news saying his business partner ran away with all the money leaving nothing behind. Bobby’s family owned one of the biggest supermarket chains in South Korea. Millions and millions of dollars were taken. News outlets had different stories to tell. It was a scandal and it was big. Bobby’s father saw it coming that’s why he decided to take his family out of the country as soon as possible especially that they’re a known family. He didn’t want his sons to be under the spotlight because of his mess.

*last leg*

Hanbin loved what he was doing. He loved the people who love him. And as much as he wanted to meet everyone who wanted to meet him, he was tired. He too had limits. He was exhausted mentally, physically, and emotionally. He has been touring the world for the past 9 months. Asia, Australia, Europe, South America, North America, he has been everywhere. His body was giving up; he was skinnier than he ever was; he wasn’t happy. He just had to get through the month then he’ll be free. He was excited to go home and eat his mom’s cooking. He was excited to play with his sister. He was excited to meet up with his friends. He was excited to go on trips. He was excited to be a normal person and not a celebrity. He has been working his ass off the last 4 years and he thought he deserved some time for himself.

“Japan, this is the last leg of my One and Only Tour. It’s been a crazy 9 months. I’ve performed in places I never thought I’d be able to and this is not because of me. This is because of you guys. Thank you. Thank you for the support you have been giving me. Thank you for coming out tonight. I’ll be back soon with new and better songs. Wait for me. Let’s meet again soon. I love you all!” Hanbin talks in tears to his fans. He has been doing the same show for 9 months but he gets so emotional seeing people cheer for him.

Hanbin’s friends came to see his last show in Japan. They planned a trip to Niseko right after Hanbin’s concert. Hanbin has been so busy his friends were actually excited for this trip. It’s been a long time since their last one. 

They arrive Hokkaido after an hour and a half plane ride from Tokyo. They check in at their hotel and have lunch. All they had planned to do in Niseko was to ski and to drink. Skiing was a childhood activity for them. Ever since they were young, they would always choose Japan over other countries. That was how they loved skiing.

After having spent the day skiing, they get dinner at their favourite restaurant and they buy beer and bring them to their hotel room. They catch up and talk about life. Something they haven’t done in a while. Hanbin was tired but this time he was happy. Spending time with people who mattered most was what mattered to him most. After a few bottles of beer, everyone was already half drunk. They spent the time reminiscing old memories.

“Remember when we used to ring other peoples doorbell in the hotel and run to the elevator and we freak out because the elevator took so long to open and we were scared the people staying in the room would catch us?” Chanwoo shares what he remembers. Everyone nods and laughs.

“It was Bobby who did most of the ringing. And he never gives a warning before he does it! Next thing we know we were already running for our lives!” Yunhyeong says and they laugh again.

“Crazy guy. Whatever happened to him?” Jinhwan asks. The mood suddenly changes. They all ponder. They practically grew up with Bobby and after he left for the states three years ago, no one has heard from him.

Junhoe shrugs. “He never contacted you after he left Hanbinnie?” he asks.  
Hanbin shakes his head.

“You never tried to reach him?” Junhoe asks again.

“I did. For a year. For over a year. Until I realized you can’t find someone who doesn’t want to be found.” Hanbin says.

“Well we really can’t blame him. What happened to his family was insane. Nobody saw it coming. Even my parents were surprised.” Jinhwan says.

“Yeah but their family came back last year. His father was able to pay back his debt and he’s actually back on track. Just like nothing really happened.” Yunhyeong says.

“Still no Bobby though. Crazy. Batshit crazy.” Junhoe says.

There was dead silence. 

“Ya what’s with the mood we were having fun!” Chanwoo exclaims after a little while.

“I’ll go get more beer.” Hanbin says and gets up to get 5 more bottles from the fridge.

“Do you think he’s over him?” Junhoe asks the others. 

“Of course he is! It’s been three years.” Yunhyeong says.

“And he doesn’t talk about it anymore so I guess so too.” Jinhwan says.

They all change the topic when Hanbin walks back to the room. He hands out beer to everyone and the toast to the night. “Thanks for coming and thanks for this trip. I needed this.” Hanbin says.

“Don’t cry.” Chanwoo teases and they all laugh.

They finish the beer they bought. They talk and laugh a little more before they’re all blacked out.

\------

Jinhwan was a pediatrician. His worked at the hospital his family owned. His father was the hospital’s chief executive and he was in line to be the next. He was being trained and he was studying a lot while working on 36-hour shifts. It was only easy for him to get time off because his family owned the hospital but he knows his responsibilities and he takes his job very seriously so he doesn’t take advantage of his name and position.

While making rounds, Jinhwan saw a familiar lady outside one of the delivery rooms. It was Bobby’s mom. He didn’t know if it was right to approach but he was already walking towards her. Bobby’s mom was sitting by the hospital bench clearly waiting for someone inside. She noticed someone walking towards her and as soon as she saw Jinhwan she stood up. She gave him this endearingly smile. Bobby’s mom was always so sweet and nice towards them. Jinhwan bowed to her and she gave him a hug. “My child. It’s been so long huh? How have you been?” she asks. She was excited to see him. “I’m fine. I’m making rounds and I knew I saw someone so familiar.” Jinhwan laughs. 

“How have you been eommoni? It’s been so long” Jinhwan adds. “I’m fine. I’m fine. Jiun’s wife is about to have the baby so we’re here.” “Jinjja?! Jiun hyung’s finally having a baby?! That’s amazing! Congratulations you guys.” Jinhwan says sincerely. She nods and smiles then her smiles slowly start to disappear. She holds one of Jinhwan’s hand and wraps it with hers. “How is he?” she asks. This time seriously and hopefully. Jinhwan knew she was asking about Hanbin. “He’s great. He’s everywhere if you’ve noticed. He just finished a world tour and he’s on vacation now. I should tell him to go meet you. He’d love to see you.” Jinhwan tells her. She had this confused look on her face. Jinhwan too. 

They instantly knew they weren’t on the same page. Bobby’s mom fakes a smile and nods. “That’s good.” she says. Jinhwan knew something was up. Just as Jinhwan was about to ask what she meant, his pager rings. He was needed. “Eommoni, I’m sorry but it’s an emergency I have to go. Let’s have dinner sometimes okay?” Jinhwan kisses her cheek and she nods. Jinhwan turns around and runs to where he was needed.

11pm

One of Jinhwan’s co-doctor came in so he was free to leave since there was a substitute for him. He called Chanwoo to ask if they were still together and that he’d be going since his shift was up. He couldn’t stop thinking about his interaction with Bobby’s mom and how strange it was. He drives to the restaurant and meets the guys there. He shares his encounter to the boys and they were sure she was asking about Hanbin.

“You should call her Hanbinnie.” Yunhyeong says.

“I will. Did you get her number Jinhwan?” Hanbin asks.

“No. I wasn’t able to. It was a quick encounter I didn’t even have time to ask how Bobby was.” Jinhwan responds.

“We’ll figure it out.” Yunhyeong says.

“What if Bobby comes back? Would you guys accept him?” Chanwoo asks out of curiosity. Bobby leaving wasn’t easy for them and him not even trying to contact them once, especially after finding out his family was back in Korea, they hated him for it.

“To tell you honestly, I don’t really think about him anymore. I do but not that often. He doesn’t care so why should we?” Junhoe says his part.

They all nod. They were disappointed with what Bobby did to them. They understood he was ashamed but they were family. They would never judge.

“I’d take him back. I miss him. I think about him a lot. He’s stupid you know. I wonder how he is or what he’s doing. He’s family and we forgive family.” Jinhwan says. 

“Yeokshi nice guy Kim Jinhwan.” Yunhyeong teases.

“How about you Hanbinnie? What would you do if he came back?” Chanwoo asks. 

They all stare at Hanbin and waits for him to answer. If there was one who was really affected by Bobby leaving, it was him. They saw how many nights he cried, how many people he bothered to ask if they have contact, how many songs he wrote about him. Hanbin had it hard and it took him a long time to accept he was gone. They were thankful he was busy with his career. It helped him a lot. But he was depressed for a very long time.

“Why are we talking about a person who’s not here?” Hanbin says.

“Why are you avoiding the question?” Chanwoo rebuts. They all laugh at Hanbin.

“He’s right. There are more important things we should be talking about. Like our Europe trip next month!!!!” Junhoe says and they cheer. They have been planning this trip for over a year but everyone was busy so they kept postponing it. 

“I’m flying to the Philippines next week with my parents anyone of you want to come?” Hanbin asks.

“Can’t. Already gonna be gone for a while next month so I can’t excuse myself from the hospital anymore.” Jinhwan says.

“Same. My father’s gonna kill me if I leave again before Europe. He thinks I’m not taking his company seriously.” Chanwoo says.

“I’ll go!” Yunhyeong raises his hand up.

“Of course you are going.” Hanbin says.

“I’ll see if I can. I’ll call you to confirm.” Junhoe tells Hanbin.

They finish another bottle of wine before deciding to go home.

*insert ph posts*

Hanbin bought a place for himself recently but he hasn’t had the time to finish decorating it. He spent days fixing his place. Chanwoo gave him a turntable as a gift so he decides to out to buy records for it. His friend owns a record store name rm360 so he decides to get it there. It was mostly hip-hop records sold there so he bought some and left to go to Gimbap Records, for the classics. 

After getting what he needed, he pays for it then he walks out of the store. As he was walking out, two guys were walking in. One guy’s arm was wrapped around the neck of the other so they were blocking the whole door since they were beside each other. Hanbin wears a hoodie and a mask when going out. He walks looking down because he doesn’t want people to recognize him especially when he was alone. He looks up to give way to the guys coming in and once he does he sees the face of the guy who has his arm wrapped around the other. He freezes. His heart beats faster and faster by the second. The guy looks at him too and as soon as he does, Hanbin pulls up his mask to his nose and walks out of the door as quickly as he can. It was Bobby. 

Bobby releases his arm from the other guy and he turns around to follow Hanbin with his eyes.

“Do you know him?” Donghyuk asks. Donghyuk was the name of the guy Bobby was with.

Bobby turns back around and focuses on Donghyuk’s question. “No.”

“Okay.” Donghyuk says and picks out records to buy.

Hanbin’s car was parked two blocks away so he had to walk that much. After walking a block, he stops and he looks back. He takes his right hand to his chest and he feels his heartbeat. It was beating insanely fast. The last time he was that nervous was during his first concert. He takes a deep breath before he starts walking again. He gets to his car and he sits in silence for a few minutes before he drives home.

Hanbin gets home and goes directly to his room. He thinks about Bobby. He was different the last time he saw him. His hair was longer, his body was bigger, he looked older. He was with a guy and the guys was wrapped around his arm. "Maybe it was his new boyfriend." he says to himself. He didn’t know what to feel. All he knows was that he was nervous. He was so nervous. Bobby still had that effect on him but he thought it was just because they haven’t seen each other for a very long time. “At least I know he’s alive and well.” He whispers to himself again while lying down on his bedroom carpet. He takes his hand to his chest again and he stays there until he falls asleep.

*days after*

 

Hanbin has spent free days at home with his family and having dinner with his friends when they’re not busy but most of the time he was just fixing his new place. Jinhwan gave him a chair for his studio, Junhoe gave him a TV and Yunhyeong gave him a fridge as gifts. His place was almost done. All he needed was a little bit of art. Hanbin loves to take photos so he had some of his favorites printed and posted in his studio wall. He wanted paintings for his living room and he anime character figurines for his room and his studio. 

 

There was this store Bobby had loved going to when they were dating. He remembered so decides to drop buy and get some stuff for his studio. While looking for stuff, a guy walks in. “Annyeong unnie!” the guy says. “What’s up? Is Bobby coming?” the lady by the counter asks. He remembered Bobby knew the owner of the place. There never came a chance for Bobby to introduce him to the owner when they were dating so the lady doesn’t recognize him as someone related to Bobby. “No. He’s still asleep.” The guy responds to the lady’s question. Hanbin lets out a sigh of relief. 

His back was facing the two so he couldn’t really see the guy’s face but he know it was the one Bobby was with the other day at the record store. He picked up a toy he liked and he noticed the guy was beside him. “You like slam dunk?” the guy asks. Hanbin looks at the toys he was holding and he looks at the guy beside him. He pulls down his mask to his chin and says “Oh, yeah.” and smiles. “Oh! You’re BI!” the guy says. Hanbin smiles shyly and bows to him. The guy bows back. “I’m a fan of your music. I was literally listening to your album on the way here. It’s crazy bumping into you.” Hanbin doesn’t know what to say. He feels awkward and shy so he says thanks. “I’m Donghyuk by the way.” Donghyuk reaches his hand out to Hanbin. Hanbin politely shakes it. 

“I’m sorry I got what I need I have to go.” Hanbin tells Donghyuk. “Oh of course. It was nice meeting you.” They shake hands one last time and Hanbin proceeds to pay for the toys he bought.

He gets in his car and he says, “I have to stop going out. They’re everywhere.” He drives back to his place forgetting about the paintings he wanted to look at.

\----

UPDATE 3 

Jinhwan was making rounds when he bumps into Jiun, Jiun’s wife, and Bobby’s mom. They were checking out of the hospital since it was okay for the baby to go home. He hugs them one by one. Jiun is the most thrilled to see him. “Look at you all grown up! Who would’ve thought huh?” Jiun says and laughs. “Look at you! You have a baby! Crazy!” Jinhwan says in return. They all laugh. Jinhwan walks them out of the hospital while they talk. Jiun’s wife, the baby, and their mom gets in the car and Jiun stays a while since they were still catching up. “Uhm hyung, how about Bobby? How is he?” Jinhwan asks. Jiun looks confused. “What do you mean?” he asks. “I mean it’s been three years and none of us has heard from him. Is he doing well in the States? How is he?” Jinhwan asks genuinely. 

Jiun has this worried expression on his face. “Jinani he left. Three years ago. He left the States to go back here. All this time we thought he was with you guys. He wasn’t?” Jiun explains. Jinhwan gets nervous. He doesn’t understand the situation. He doesn’t understand why Bobby would leave his home and say he’s coming back to Korea and not show up at all. “Why did he leave? Why don’t you know where he is now? Hyung it’s been three years. Have you even tried to look for him?” Jinhwan is now slightly annoyed at the situation. He loved Bobby as a brother and he wouldn’t know what to do if something bad happened to him. 

“Dad hired a PI to check up on him when we were in the States. He reported once every three month. We know he went back to Korea and flew to England after a while. When we got back, we stopped investigating on him and tried to respect his decision to stay away. The last time we heard of him was that he we was in London finishing up his master’s degree but that was last year. We haven’t heard from him ever since. We assumed you guys knew what was going on.”  
“Hyung we have no idea what’s going on. We haven’t seen or heard from you guys for three years. We don’t know where the hell Bobby is. Why did he leave you guys anyway?” Jinhwan’s so close to being mad. The whole situation was just crazy and stupid.

“He didn’t know what was about to blow out when we left. All we told him was that we decided to migrate. He didn’t know about dad’s company or the scandal. He heard the same time as everyone else in Korea.” Jiun explains.

“That explains why Hanbin didn’t know. If Bobby knew he would’ve told Hanbin for sure. Why didn’t you just tell him?”

“We knew he wasn’t going to leave with us. Him being here would put him in danger. It was a huge scandal. You know that. Mom and Dad wouldn’t allow him to be around all that while it was happening.”

“But he never came to us. You said he went back. He never did. No one saw him or heard from him. The whole time we thought he was still in the States but I guess that’s not the case now.”

“That’s what I don’t get also. I don’t know why he didn’t go to you. He must’ve been ashamed of what happened. I’m so sorry this happened.” 

“Maybe. But hyung do you really have no contact with him now?”

“No I’m sorry. But now that I know he didn’t come to you I’ll go find out for sure. I’ll contact you once I reach him. Give me your cell.” Jiun and Jinhwan exchange numbers. They agreed to contact each other if ever they hear news about Bobby.

*insert texts*

The guys arrive at the restaurant one by one. When Jinhwan arrived, everyone was already there except for Hanbin who said he was going to be late. Jinhwan felt uneasy. They open a bottle of wine and have dinner while they waited. An hour and a while later, Hanbin arrives. Jinhwan explains the situation to the boys. Yunhyeong got so worried he started tearing up. 

“Do you think he’s okay though?” Chanwoo asks.

“Please don’t think of anything bad. Nothing happened to him. He’s probably still in London. We’re going there next month we can check. Is there a way we can look for him now though?” Yunhyeong asks. He’s in a slight panic.

“Why didn’t he come to us?” Junhoe asks.

“I don’t know. Nobody knows.” Jinhwan answers, still trying to understand the situation.

Hanbin studies the room. He wanted to laugh at the situation but he was having fun seeing them all worried about someone who probably doesn’t even care about them anymore. He stays quiet and listens to their concerns for a little while more.

“I’ll go call dad’s PI and ask if he can help.” Chanwoo suggests.  
“Of course he can help he’s a PI!” Yunhyeong exclaims.

“I don’t know why but I kinda don’t care where he is.” Junhoe says. 

“He could be dead you know. Like for real. Don’t you have a heart?!” Junhoe was getting into Chanwoo’s nerves.

“Okay, okay!! Stop this nonsense!” Hanbin stands up and shouts. “You all look stupid right now. If Bobby can see you, he’d probably be laughing his ass out.” He adds.

“Kim Hanbin this is serious! Nobody knows where the fuck he is! Just because you’re over him doesn’t mean we are. He’s our friend, our family. Can you honestly say he’s nothing to you now?” Jinhwan says mad.

“You still don’t get it.” Hanbin says and sits back down his chair. “Bobby is very much alive you assholes. And he’s here in Korea.” 

Yunhyeong, Chanwoo, and Jinhwan looks at Hanbin with their eyes opened widely.

“How’d you know that?” Junhoe asks calmly.

“Because I saw him the other day.” Hanbin says back.

“Where?!” Jinhwan asks.

“At a record store in Mapo-gu.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?!” Yunhyeong asks annoyed.

“You were way too funny to watch.”

“Fucking asshole.” Chanwoo says slightly irritated. 

Junhoe and Hanbin laughs.

“Did you know he was here Juneya?” Jinhwan asks.

“Nope. I told you, I don’t care.”

Jinhwan rolls his eyes.

“Did he see you though?” Chanwoo asks Hanbin.

“I don’t know I had a mask on. And I left as soon as they arrived.”

“Who was he with?”

“I don’t know. Oh, I do actually.” Hanbin tries to remember the name. “Uhhhh something-hyuk. I don’t remember his name but it sounded something like that.

“So you talked to them?” Jinhwan asks.

“Nope. Just the guy he was with. I bumped into him again a few days after. He said he was a fan of my music.”

“Did he know you? I mean as Bobby’s ex?” 

“Don’t know. Don’t think so.”

“So he’s here. That’s good. Easier to find and contact.” Jinhwan says.

“What for?” Junhoe asks honestly.  
Yunhyeong, Jinhwan and Chanwoo glare at him.

“He’s right. What for?” Hanbin supports Junhoe.

“Aren’t you worried about him? Aren’t you curious what happened to him? He cut contact with us, with his family. Nobody knew where he was until now. Something must’ve happened to him for him to just disappear.” Jinhwan asks sincerely.

“Something surely did happen but clearly he didn’t need us for it. He didn’t care to let us know so what's the point in finding out now? Was he even slightly worried about us? Jinani we spent a year looking for him. I didn't stop after you all did. I continued to try to reach him. I spent over a year looking and crying over him. I prayed every day for him to be safe. Yeah he had it hard, but we had it hard too. We cared but did he?” Hanbin says with hate and disappointment.

“He’s right. If he needed us he would’ve came to us. If he treated us like family, he would’ve let us know where he was or even just inform us that he was alive and okay. He knew where to find us but never did he try to approach. So I’m sorry but I’m done with him. I’ve been done with him for a while now.” Junhoe says.

The atmosphere in the room has gotten emotional. Yunhyeong and Jinhwan have started crying. Chanwoo went quiet because he knew the two made a point. He didn’t know what to say anymore. Bobby really did hurt them. All of them. 

“You think you know a person but he turns out to be the total opposite.” Hanbin says and scoffs. “You guys look for him if you want. I’m not interested. Really. It’s understandable that you guys still care. We’ve been together our whole lives. Just don’t force me to be in this little game again because just like Junhoe, I’m done. I don’t care anymore. I’m done caring. I offered everything I had to offer and now I’m all out. Empty.” Hanbin says frankly. The others feel for him. Yunhyeong tilts his head up because his tears won't stop falling. Jinhwan was wiping away his. As much as they wanted to get mad at Hanbin for being heartless towards the situation, the couldn't because what he went through was hell.

Hanbin gets up from his chair and walks to the door. “I’m gonna go ahead.” He says before leaving the room completely.

“I’m sorry guys.” Junhoe says apologetically and leaves the room right after Hanbin.

*insert texts jn-hb*

*ADDITIONAL NOTES*

\- Bobby disappearing was understood by Hanbin and their friends as running away from their family's scandal. Yes they were worried but not to the point that they thought something bad happened to him because they know that if something did, their families would be the one to find out first. 

\- They only thought of the bad things that could have possibly happened to Bobby when Jinhwan talked to Jiun and not even Jiun knew where he was. This time it was a different kind of worry because Bobby was alone and missing (as they all thought before Hanbin told them he saw him). 

\- Bobby didn't know about his family's plan. What he was told was that there were better opportunities for him and his brother in the States and his father also had to meet American investors. So the one's moving were Bobby, his mom, and his brother and his dad would go back and forth to Korea and America. He was tricked into going and he didn't know that the sole reason they left was because his father was in hiding. 

*ideas - bobbys parents called hanbins parents to keep an eye on bobby when he came back to korea. what hanbins parents did was promised to help pay his dads debts and help clear out the issue and pay for his education in london in the condition that he has to stay away from hanbin since it would affect hanbins career.  
\- hanbin meets w jiwons eomma

3rd UPDATE 

Jinhwan found a way to get Bobby’s address. He was supposed to go with Chanwoo and Yunhyeong but the two were busy so he decides to go alone. He drives to Itaewon and parks at the edge of the street. He needed time to think so he walks up the hill until he reaches Bobby’s gate. 

He contemplates on ringing Bobby’s doorbell. He’s nervous. He doesn’t know if Bobby wanted to see him. After minutes of contemplating, he rings the doorbell. He’s fidgety. Donghyuk was in the front lawn reading a book while sipping coffee so he decides to open the gate than to go back inside to check the monitor. Jinhwan wasn’t expecting a different person to open the gate so he gets more nervous. “Hi. I’m sorry for disturbing you early in the morning. I just wanted to know if Bobby lived here? Kim Jiwon?” Jinhwan asks as politely as he can. “No, no it’s okay. He does. He’s inside though. May I know who you are so that I can tell him?” Donghyuk responds with this sweet, nice voice. “Jinhwan. Kim Jinhwan. I’m an old friend.” He says. Donghyuk reaches out his hand and introduces himself too. They shake hands. 

“I’ll go call him. Come inside.” Donghyuk opens the gate wider so that Jinhwan can enter. It was a nice house; kinda big for two. The exterior was something Bobby would want for his house so now he’s even more sure Bobby lived there. Jinhwan steps in the house and takes a seat at the couch. Donghyuk offers him coffee before he climbs up the stairs where the rooms were to call Bobby. Jinhwan scans the house. It was mostly white, gray and black with hints of red and blue. There was a huge glass window by the dining area which showed the pool out back. “Not bad, Kimbap.” He says to himself.

“Babe someone is here to see you.” Donghyuk says as he opens the door to their room. Jinhwan overhears. “Must be the quokka.” He says to himself again and laughs. Bobby responds to Donghyuk but Jinhwan couldn’t hear clearly what he said since he was inside the room. Jinhwan waits downstairs anxiously.  
Bobby asks who it was and Donghyuk says Jinhwan’s name. It startles Bobby. He wasn’t sure at first if it was really Hanbin he saw or if he was just imagining but now he’s certain. He gets nervous. He doesn’t know if he should go down or not. He wasn’t ready to see them. He didn’t know what to say. 

“Are you okay?” Donghyuk asks. Bobby was pacing back and forth of the room. “Is he alone?” Bobby asks. “Yeah.” “Just Jinhwan?” “Yes babe and he’s waiting.” Bobby takes his shirt on the bed and wears it. He rubs his hair and prepares to get down. He’s so nervous he’s nearly shaking.

Donghyuk climbs down the stairs first then Bobby follows. Jinhwan stands up when he sees them coming down. “Hi.” Bobby says awkwardly as he reaches the ground floor. “You’re alive.” Jinhwan says. And then they hug each other. “Yah imma where have you been?” Jinhwan says and slaps his butt. Donghyuk smiles at what he sees and excuses himself to give them privacy. “I’ll go prepare you guys breakfast.” He says and leaves the living room.

Bobby and Jinhwan sits beside each other. They laugh and they hug again. It was awkward and emotional at the same time. “Chanwoo and Yunhyeong was supposed to come but they’re busy so it’s just me.” Jinhwan says. “Yeah, yeah I see you guys in the news and in magazines. Amazing really.” Bobby says being all proud of his friends.

“So? Aren’t you gonna tell me what happened?” Jinhwan asks. The mood starts to get serious.

“I don’t know. It just happened. I don’t know.” Bobby doesn’t know what to say.  
“Was that your boyfriend?” Jinhwan asks to lighten up the mood.

“Oh, Donghyukie? Yeah. He’s amazing. He introduced himself right?”  
Jinhwan nods. 

“I bumped into Jiun and your mom. Hyung just had a baby. Did you know?”  
Bobby’s eyes widen. He shakes his head.

“Kimbap what happened?” Jinhwan asks again. This time seriously.

“I don’t know where to start. I just wanted to get away. From everything. You know what happened. I was ashamed.” He says.

“Why didn’t you come to us? You came back to Korea Jiun said. Why didn’t you come?”

“I don’t know. I just thought it was better if I left.”

“Without even saying goodbye?” 

Before Bobby can answer, Donghyuk comes in the living room from the kitchen. 

“Breakfast is ready.”

They both get up and proceed to the dining area. Donghyuk was nice and pleasant to talk to. He shared how he and Bobby met in London. He talked about how difficult it was to get to know Bobby at first because he didn’t really say much. He was a closed book. They talked about how he left the US earlier this year to move back to Korea where Bobby was based and open a dance studio. He was a part of The Kinjaz dance crew and he brought a few members with him from the States to start a Korean chapter.

They talked about Bobby’s business and how it grew. He now partly owns a number of bars and clubs around Seoul.

“Hip-hop artists usually rent out his clubs for private parties. There’s one I really like but I don’t think he’ll be releasing anytime soon so I guess there’s no chance in watching him perform live until his next tour.” Donghyuk says sadly.

“Who is it?” Jinhwan asks curiously.

“BI. Do you know him? Oh babe I forgot to tell you, I met him the other day.” He says excitedly shrugging off his question to Jinhwan. Jinhwan looks at Bobby and Bobby shakes his head. Bobby has not told Donghyuk about Hanbin. 

“I met him at Chaerin unnie’s store. He was buying Slam Dunk figurines. Just like the ones you have. Oh! I just realized something! Maybe that’s why I like him because he’s so much like you.” Donghyuk says innocently. Bobby felt bad. He knew he had to tell him sooner. Especially now that his past is slowly crawling back to his new life.

They talk about a lot more stuff for hours until they realize it was time to go to work.

“Thanks for breakfast. It was great. And it was so great meeting you.” Jinhwan tells Donghyuk. 

“You too. It’s nice knowing someone from Bobby’s past. He never really talks about it.” He says.

“We should have dinner sometime. When you guys are not busy.” Jinhwan says.

Donghyuk offers his number and saves it.

“I need yours too, Bob.” Jinhwan doesn’t let Bobby off. He knows Bobby wouldn’t say no in front of Donghyuk so he purposely asks in front of him. 

Donghyuk excuses himself for he needed to get ready for work so Bobby walks Jinhwan out. 

“He’s great. Really nice.” Jinhwan compliments Donghyuk.

“He is. He’s the best.” Bobby says proudly.

“You still have a lot of explaining to do.”  
Jinhwan says as he steps out of the gate.

“I know. And I know you won’t let me off. I’m ready to be bothered for the rest of my life.” Bobby laughs.

“Oh, I won’t. And Yunhyeong won’t. And Chanwoo won’t.” 

Bobby waits for Junhoe and Hanbin’s name to come up but it doesn’t. “I guess the other two aren’t my biggest fans right now huh?” 

“Nope. Not even close. But they’ll get by. I’m sure somewhere deep inside, they miss you too.”

“I’m gonna have to dig a very deep hole to get there.” Bobby says and laughs. 

“Jinani, I’m so sorry for disappearing like that. I don’t deserve you. Any of you. You have no idea how happy I am that you showed up here.”

“Why didn’t you just come to us?”

“I wish it was that easy.”

“It’s us. Why would it be hard?”

“I don’t know. Just… things.”

“Well you better work your ass off if you want back.”

“I won’t let you down. Not this time.”

“You better. I gotta go now.” Jinhwan says and they hug again. Jinhwan rubs the back of Bobby’s head. “It’s not gonna be easy but everything’s gonna turn out how they’re supposed to. You’ll be fine.”

Bobby understood what Jinhwan was talking about so he nods. “Thank you. I’ll call you. I promise.”

Jinhwan walks downhill, gets in his car and drives home.

*a few days after*

Bobby initiated a meet up with Jinhwan, Chanwoo, and Yunhyeong. He wanted to see them badly so he invited them to his newly opened bar in Itaewon called Cakeshop. He also wanted the guys to see what he has been up to since he came back from London last year. He tried reaching out to Junhoe but Junhoe didn’t budge. Instead, he went to Jeju with Hanbin and Hanbin’s friends.  
Jinhwan, Yunhyoeng and Chanwoo uses Jinhwan’s car to get there. Bobby was waiting up front when they arrived. The two couldn’t wait to get out of the car so they do even before Jinhwan can find a parking space. Yunhyeong runs to Bobby and Bobby carries him from the air. Chanwoo gives him a hug then slaps his head right after. “Where the fuck have you been?” he says. 

Jinhwan arrives and they all hug and jump around each other like a bunch of kids. “Let’s talk inside.” Bobby says.

It wasn’t as big as the usual clubs but it was already one of the most respected and prominent underground clubs in Seoul even after only a few months of being open. “Not bad, Kimbap.” Yunhyeong says and taps Bobby’s back. Bobby leads them to the VIP area and they take their seats at the couch that was surrounding the table. Someone hands Bobby a bottle of bourbon and 4 glasses and Bobby places them on top of the table. He pours the liquor into their glasses and hands them out one by one. “Thanks for coming.” He says as he raises his glass and they all toast. “Junhoe would’ve loved this.” Chanwoo says while looking at the alcohol inside his glass. “I’ll buy him a more expensive one if only he’d let me.” Bobby says. “You wouldn’t have to if you didn’t leave.” Jinhwan says. The mood suddenly gets serious.

“Things just became complicated.” Bobby says.

“How?” Yunhyeong asks. 

“Well, you sure know what happened. 

And I don’t know. I was mad and ashamed and I just wanted to runaway.” Bobby explains. 

“And you did. Away from us, away from Hanbinnie and if Jinhwan didn’t appear on your doorstep you still wouldn’t be around.” Chanwoo says frankly. 

“I’m a coward I know. I was scared. Not that I didn’t want to. I did try. Really.” 

“When?” Jinhwan asks.

Bobby takes time to think. He doesn’t know if it was right to tell them but he does anyway. “I followed you during the holidays. The year I Ieft, our families spent Christmas in New York. During your stay you guys went to a bar in Manhattan and you went out carrying a very drunk Hanbin. The year after, you guys were in Switzerland. I was already in London then so I took a train. I saw you guys ice skating. You were laughing your asses out when Yunhyoeng fell on his butt. I’ve never seen Hanbin laugh that hard for the longest time so it’s something I’d never forget. You guys were happy. You were having fun. And, I don’t know, but seeing you guys happy was enough to get me going already. I tried to be where you guys were even though I was meters away. Hanbin’s private night at APT Club and his first concert in Seoul. I was slowly becoming a stalker. That’s when I knew I had to stop and let go.” There were so much more instances he wanted to tell them about but he realized it would not change the fact that all he did was be there and not even try to approach. 

“Switzerland was also the time Hanbin laughed again after you left.” Chanwoo says. “If only you knew what he went through. Maybe if I were in his place I wouldn’t forgive you too. I kinda hate that I’m soft for you.”

The talked as if they were the only ones in the room. They didn’t notice the noise the crowd was making or the music that was blasting. They were so into the conversation that nothing else mattered.

“You were already there. Why didn’t you just come? Bobby, even if you killed someone, we’d still help you get rid of the body. That’s what we are. Whatever happens we stick around together. I thought you knew that but I guess not. You hurt us so bad. You’re just lucky we’re not as heartless Junhoe.” Yunhyeong says slightly upset. 

“I know Junhoe and I don’t think him not caring now is because he’s heartless. He gives what he gets so you can’t really blame him for acting that way.” Chanwoo says.

“I’m sorry.” Bobby apologizes for the hundredth time. Yunhyeong and Chanwoo continues to roast Bobby. Jinhwan doesn’t say anything. He watches Bobby as he explains himself to the two. One thing he got from knowing Bobby his whole life was that he was a bad liar but the two were so pressed into their emotions they don’t notice. Jinhwan was certain Bobby was hiding something. But instead of pushing it, he lets it go. He knew that when Bobby was ready, he’d talk.

Tears, laughter and a lot of shots later, they got so drunk except for Jinhwan. He was the designated driver for the night so he just had a glass of bourbon. 

Yunhyeong and Chanwoo got tired of arguing with Bobby and making him realize how wrong he was so they left the table to go dance. Bobby was seated a few seats away from Jinhwan so he scoots over to where Jinhwan was when the two left.  
“Jinani, I promised myself I’d be honest with you guys if given a chance to explain myself.” Bobby was slurring his words. “But I also promised them I won’t tell anybody.” Bobby was so drunk he starts crying. He rests his head in Jinhwan’s shoulders. 

“What are you talking about?” Jinhwan was worried and curious at the same time.

“Just.. promise me you won’t tell Hanbinnie…promise me.. I don’t want him to hate them. Please don’t tell Hanbinnie..” Bobby says in between sobs.

Jinhwan takes Bobby face in his hands. 

“Hey. Stop crying. You’re fine. I won’t tell Hanbin don’t worry.” 

“Don’t tell him okay..?” Bobby asks one more time. Jinhwan nods and after he does, Bobby drops down dead in the couch. 

Jinhwan rubs Bobby’s back. He doesn’t know what exactly what happened to Bobby but he felt so sorry. He doesn’t know what exactly Bobby went through but his heart was hurting for him.

He takes out his phone and dials Donghyuk.

A couple minutes later, Donghyuk arrives at Cakeshop. He helps Jinhwan get him up and they call for a bouncer to help them get him to the car. Once Bobby is settled, Donghyuk says thanks and drives home with Bobby. Jinhwan drops the other two off their houses and drives home with a heavy heart and a confused mind.

Update 4 

Jinhwan has been bothered by what Bobby said when he was drunk. It’s been on his mind for the past few days. Bobby had a hard time saying what it was about when he was drunk so he was sure Bobby wouldn’t say when sober. He didn’t want to let Yunhyeong and Chanwoo know because he knew they won’t let it go and they’d be bothering Bobby. He couldn’t keep it to himself so he went to Junhoe. Junhoe didn’t care enough so he knew Junhoe wouldn’t say anything to anyone. 

Junhoe was annoying the heck out of Jinhwan but the fact that he now knows Bobby left for another reason made him curious. He couldn’t think of a possible reason why and he hated it that he didn’t know. He thought of going to Bobby to try asking him but he knew it wasn’t appropriate to do that. He was just being nosy. 

He invites the guys out for drinks later that night but everyone was busy so he visits Hanbin at his place instead. He brings him Japanese take out from one of Yunhyeong’s restaurants and a couple bottles of beer. 

Hanbin’s dining area was near his huge glass window which overlooked the city. Junhoe places the food and the beer on top and he takes off his coat. He throws at the couch and sits down at the chair facing Hanbin.

“What were you doing the whole day?” Junhoe asks Hanbin as they eat the sushi he brought in. 

“I slept. Stayed up until morning making songs.” Hanbin responds.

“Satisfied with anything you made?” 

“Nah. I was just bored. Everyone’s busy. I was planning on going out alone but..”

“But what?”

“Nothing.”

“Really? What’s up with you and Jinhwan wanting to be forced to talk before saying it’s so annoying. You’re gonna tell me anyway.”

“Why what’s Jinhwan not telling you?” Hanbin got curious.

Junhoe remembers that Bobby was asking Jinhwan not to tell Hanbin whatever it was he was talking about so he says “He didn’t say.”

Hanbin nods and takes a piece of sushi. He dips it into the soy sauce before eating it.

“So you’re just gonna leave me hanging?” Junhoe asks.

“You know how I don’t like going out alone and both times I went alone by myself I bump into Bobby and his boyfriend.”

“I thought you didn’t care?” Junhoe raises his eyebrow and smiles cheekily.

Hanbin looks at Junhoe and glares. “I don’t.”

“If you say sooooo.”

“I just don’t know what to say okay? We haven’t talked in years. Do I say hi? Do I ignore him? Does he even remember me? I don’t know what to do and you know how awkward I get when I don’t know what to do and I don’t want him to think that I’m awkward around him because he’s gonna think I haven’t moved on yet and..” Hanbin was talking so fast it seemed like he was rapping. 

“Woah woah woah easy!! I didn’t say anything why are you so defensive?” Junhoe was laughing so hard.

Hanbin punches Junhoe’s arm hard he screams but he doesn’t stop laughing.

“It’s okay if you’re not over him, Hanbinnie. I won’t take it against you.” Junhoe says this time half serious.

“I am.”

“Look, he’s slowly coming back to our lives. Right now it’s just them hanging out but time will come they will hangout around the both of us too. Whether you’re ready to face him or not, it will happen. It will happen when you expect it and when you don’t expect it. Stop overthinking. Say hi if you feel like it or don’t if you don’t. It’s okay. And you’re gonna be okay. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good. You’ll be fine, Hanbinnie don’t worry.” Junhoe assures him.

Hanbin nods.

“Serious question though, do you think something else happened to him? I mean aside from the scandal?” Junhoe asks.

Hanbin shakes his head. “I looked for every possible reason but I just couldn’t think of anything that made sense. So I thought, maybe he just really wanted to leave. Maybe he just really wanted to stay away. Maybe he realized the life he had with us wasn’t what he really wanted. Or maybe he realized it wasn’t me he really wanted to be with. Maybe he finally figured that it was his chance to escape the life he had with me. It was so hard thinking of what I did wrong that drove him away. Or thinking what I could’ve done or said better so that he stayed. I thought maybe I wasn’t a good comfort person or maybe he thought I couldn’t help with what he was going through. But even if that was the case, I would’ve understood. I just hoped he told me because it was so hard, Juneya. It was so fucking hard.”

Hanbin said those words like he was still going through the pain he went through. But Junhoe, he disagreed. He was a witness at how happy Bobby was with Hanbin. He thought that there was no way in hell he could’ve faked all of that. 

“Hanbinnie, I can’t tell you the exact reason why he left. In fact, no one can. Only Bobby can do that. But here’s what I can tell you; it wasn’t your fault. You don’t how Bobby talked about you when you weren’t around. You don’t know how much he’d say he was so freaking happy and how grateful he was you guys happened. He was head over heels in love with you and he was an emotional wreck the day he found out he had to leave and even on the days after. He just couldn’t show you because he knew he needed to be strong for you. So I wish you stopped blaming youself because it wasn’t your fault. We’ll find out what happened.”

“I don’t know if I want to know, though.” Hanbin says honestly.

Junhoe doesn’t respond but he nods. He understood where Hanbin was coming from. He takes his beer up and taps the tip to Hanbin’s bottle. They both gulp down their last bottle and stare in blank space deep in their thoughts.

*a few days later*

Bobby had meeting with his accountants in regards to the finances of his business. He had an office space so he usually met up with his people there. Right after, he happily walks them out of the house and into their cars parked outside. 

When he was about to go back in, he notices a familiar face in side theFerrari F60 America parked across the street. He stops and stares for a while. It was Junhoe. Junhoe steps out of the car, stares at Bobby, and he nods. Bobby nods back. He closes his house gate and he crosses the street. They don’t shake hands, they don’t hug each other. Junhoe was leaning on his car and Bobby was standing in front of him. 

“Do you want to go in?” Bobby offers. 

“I won’t be staying long.” Junhoe responds. Bobby doesn’t know what to say next. He wasn’t expecting anyone especially Junhoe. 

“I tired reaching out to you but you never answered any of my calls.” Bobby says.

“I had nothing to say.”

Bobby nods. It’s awkward. 

“I don’t know if you know but you said something to Jinhwan when you were drunk. You made him promise not to tell Hanbin. And I know Jinhwan also mentioned that you said you promised someone that you won’t tell. And that someone is probably the reason why you left.” Junhoe starts.

Bobby doesn’t remember telling Jinhwan anything but he panics. He regrets drinking so much that night.

“I don’t know what that’s about and I’m not here to find out. I’m here because of Hanbin. If it’s something you can’t tell us, I would understand if you didn’t. And I know Jinhwan and the other’s would too. But Hanbin deserves to know. Whatever it was that happened, he deserves at least an explanation. And I’m not saying you do it right away, do it when you’re ready. But tell him.” Junhoe talks without looking at Bobby but he talks with all his heart. It was the first time Hanbin opened up about what he was going through and he wasn’t just gonna sit there and do nothing.

“What if I told you I can’t?” Bobby says.

Junhoe looks at Bobby in the eye.”Then you don’t deserve to be back.” 

He doesn’t give Bobby time to react anymore. He said what he came there to say. So he gets back in his car and he starts the engine. Bobby steps aside and Junhoe drives off. Bobby crouches down and he pulls his hair to his face. He keeps his face in his hands and stays there for a while. 

Donghyuk was wondering why Bobby hasn’t come back inside yet so he goes out to check. He sees Bobby across the road by the sidewalk crouched down. He crosses the street and crouches down beside him without making a sound. He rubs Bobby’s back and asks,”Wanna talk about it?” Bobby releases a deep sigh and he looks at Donhyuk on his side. He smiles at him and takes his arm and puts it around Donghyuk’s shoulders. Donghyuk leans in to Bobby and Bobby kisses his head. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine as long as you’re here.” And he sides hug Donghyuk for a little more before they go back inside.

*insert texts*

Around 7:30 pm, the guys gather in the restaurant. They were reading out the sushi choices to each other and were deciding which to get. It was a famous sushi restaurant so a lot of people were in. When Yunhyeong finds the time to breathe, hi sits with the guys at the table. He looks at the time on his watch and asks, “Is Bobby on his way? It’s almost 8.” Seemed like no one knew what he was talking about. “Didn’t you get his message?!” he asks. “Left my phone at the office.” Chanwoo says. “My battery’s dead.” Jinhwan raises his phone for them to see. Junhoe and Hanbin clearly didn’t. 

“What the heck he’s on his way here with Donghyuk he said he was gonna introduce him to everyone.” He slaps Chanwoo in the arm. 

“I haven’t checked my phone since this afternoon.” Chanwoo says kinda apologetic. 

Yunhyeong looks at Hanbin. He somehow feels responsible. “Hanbinnie mianhae I thought these guys told you that’s why I was surprised you were here I thought you agreed to this.” Yunhyeong was so sorry.

Hanbin looks at Junhoe and Junhoe looks at him back. Junhoe nods at him and gives him the ‘It’s gonna be okay’ look. 

“I don’t wanna leave I’m famished.” He says and he goes back to reading the menu. 

Yunhyeong panics. “Oh my goodness what do I do?! Bobby would probably understand if I cancel right?” Etteoke, Eotteoke?!” 

“He’ll be fine.” Junhoe assures Yunhyeong. 

The three continue to bicker and blame each other. It kinda irritated Hanbin that they were arguing in front of him so he excuses himself and goes to the wash room.

“Why did you even agree in the first place?! Didn’t you think of what Hanbin would feel? You knew we had plans tonight!” Chanwoo says angrily. 

“Hanbin wasn’t supposed to be here dumbass Junhoe was the one who forced him to go out I didn’t know until they arrived earlier and I thought they knew!” Yunhyeong defends himself.

“Shut up. It’s not gonna change the fact that Bobby’s gonna be here with his new boyfriend in a few minutes so stop fighting it’s not helping.” Junhoe says.

“By the way, Donghyuk doesn’t know about Hanbin so you better keep your mouths shut.” Jinhwan informs them. 

“Does Hanbin know that Donghyuk doesn’t know?” Chanwoo asks. 

“I don’t think so. I’ll go inform him.” 

Junhoe stands up from the table and follows Hanbin to the washroom. He stands behind Hanbin while he soaped his hands. He looks at his reflection from the mirror and asks, “Are you gonna be okay?” 

“Yeah.” Hanbin responds. 

“He doesn’t know about you.” 

“Okay.”

”Want me to wait for you?” 

“No. Go ahead. I’ll be fine.” 

“Okay.”

Junhoe leaves Hanbin alone and goes back to the table. Hanbin leans back the wall and he looks up. He takes and deep breath and exhales. He walks out of the washroom and he finds himself walking out the restaurant. Their table was at the end of the hall so the others don’t notice him go out. He takes the elevator down. He thought maybe he just needed some air.

Hanbin steps out of the hotel and walks to the far corner to take in some air. He notices a car pull up in front of the entrance and Bobby gets out from the driver seat. His heart beats a little faster and it makes it harder for him to breathe. The valet takes Bobby’s keys from him. He walks to the other side of the car and waits for Donghyuk to come out and when he does they both walk to the entrance. Bobby looks to his left and he sees Hanbin standing there staring at him. Bobby doesn’t stop walking but he doesn’t take his eyes off Hanbin. They’re eye to eye until Hanbin isn’t visible to Bobby’s view anymore. 

Donghyuk takes Bobby’s hand when they enter the elevator. “You nervous? Your hands are cold.” He says and laughs. “Yeah a bit. But I’m sure they’ll love you.” Bobby says and kisses Donghyuk’s hand. He wasn’t expecting Hanbin to be there. He wonders if they'd be joining him for dinner. 

Bobby and Donghyuk arrives at the restaurant and Yunhyeong welcomes them in. He walks them to the table and Bobby introduces Donghyuk to everyone. They all shake hands with him including Junhoe and they make them sit. 

Junhoe excuses himself. “I’ll go look for Hanbin.” He whispers to Jinhwan. Jinhwan nods. “He just needed to take a phone call.” He explains to Donghyuk and Bobby. Junhoe comes back without Hanbin a few minutes later. He informs Yunyhyeong and Yunhyeong gets up from the table. He walks to the restaurant guard and asks if they’ve seen him. The guard informs him that he went down. Yunhyeong asks the guard to ask the guards by the entrance if Hanbin left and they informed him that he already did. He walks back to their table and he shakes his head to Junhoe and Jinhwan. Chanwoo was busy talking to Donghyuk. Bobby catches up to what was going on even without anyone telling him. They feel bad for Hanbin.

They all try to get to know Donghyuk so they ask him a bunch of questions. Everyone seemed to be very fond of him except for Junhoe. He smiled and laughed at stories and jokes told but there was still a wall to be climbed to get to him. Bobby and Junhoe’s last conversation really didn’t go well so it was awkward between them. Junhoe hated Bobby’s guts. But in Bobby’s part, he wasn’t trying to hurt anyone. He genuinely just wanted them to know Donghyuk. He also wasn’t expecting Hanbin or Junhoe to be there so when he saw Hanbin earlier, it made him really nervous. It was only the second time they saw each other after 3 years. 

 

Dinner has come to an end and they say their goodbyes. They were all very pleased to meet Donghyuk. They weren’t expecting him to be very nice and sweet. They thought they were gonna hate him but after meeting him, they understood why Bobby fell for him.

 

“I think I have to go check on Hanbin.” Jinhwan says before he parts ways with the boys. “I was planning on going we can just go together.” Junhoe says. “I’m going too. I feel like this is all my fault.” Yunhyeong pouts. “It is.” Chanwoo says and he gets hit by Yunhyeong again.

They all drive to Hanbin’s building. Right below was a convenience so they buy beer, soju, chips, gummies, chocolates, and ice cream. A little of Hanbin’s favorites. 

They all knew Hanbin’s code so they don’t bother ringing the doorbell. Hanbin was standing by his huge window sipping on a bottle of beer when Chanwoo carries him on his shoulders. The three jumps around them. “What the heck? You scared me!” Hanbin asks all surprised and scared but also with the biggest smile. “We’re here to cheer you up.” Junhoe says and rubs his hair. “I’m fine.” He says but no one believed him. 

Jinhwan, Yunhyeong and Chanwoo comes out from Hanbin’s room wearing his pajama’s. “Me too!” Junhoe says and runs to Hanbin’s room to change. Jinhwan sets up the music and they all sit at Hanbin’s living room floor. Yunhyeong reaches for the throw pillows and sets them on the floor for them to get more comfortable.  
“We’re sorry we failed to inform you. Yunhyeong failed to inform us too. So it’s really Yunhyeong’s fault.” Chanwoo says. Yunhyeong throws the throw pillow to his face and they laugh.

“It’s okay. I thought I wouldn’t mind. But I guess I wasn’t ready to face him yet.” Hanbin says honestly.

“So you’re not concerned about him having a new boyfriend?” Chanwoo asks out of curiosity. 

They all wait for Hanbins response. “No. He could date two guys at the same time I wouldn’t mind. I guess I just wasn’t ready to face the person who was once the world to me but betrayed me. But his boyfriend’s actually pretty nice, I think. I kinda feel bad for leaving because of him.”

“I don’t get why Bobby hasn’t told him yet.” Chanwoo says.

Everyone shrugs.

“How long have they been dating?” Yunhyeong asks.

“They met two years ago in London but they only started dating last year. Donghyuk was based in the US then he moved back here to be with Bobby.” Jinhwan shares what he remembers.

“What was he doing in London?” Yunhyeong asks again.

“Weren’t you listening earlier?” Chanwoo says annoyed.

“I was busy preparing the food you had to eat, Sir!”

“His family lives there.” Jinhwan says.

“Why are we talking about them again?” Junhoe ask.

“It’s okay. I really don’t mind.” Hanbin says.

“You know what you need? Closure.” Jinhwan says. Everybody agrees and nods. Even Hanbin.

“What if he doesn’t give him to you?”Junhoe asks.

“Then I guess I was right all along. I was nothing to him. But I think it’s okay. It’s been too long anyway. People come and go right? The important thing is that we learned something from that short period of time. Just don’t expect me to be all friendly with him because I don’t think that will happen.”

They all agree. “And we promise to inform you first when he’s coming.” Yunhyeong says. Hanbin laughs and rubs the back of his head. He felt bad for Yunhyeong, too.

“Hear, hear!” Chanwoo says and raises his bottle. They all raise their bottles and cheers. 

They spent the rest of the night just like how they used to. Serious conversations turn into dancing around and turns into games and turns into slapping of butts.

UPDATE 5 

Donghyuk was spending the holidays in London with his family. Bobby’s family was spending it in Paris with the others. Jinhwan failed to convince Bobby to come with them so Bobby was spending the holidays alone in Seoul. It’s been lonely for him ever since he left. Christmas was always his favourite time of the year. 

The guys and their families land in Paris a day before Christmas Eve. It was an annual thing to celebrate Christmas together and away from South Korea. Yunhyeong’s family owned a beautiful mansion in the beautiful city for they spent a lot of time there. The oldies were as excited as their kids so as soon as they arrive the house, the go out to roam around and shop. They shop for clothes and food for Christmas Eve.

The guys were staying longer in Europe than their parents so they spend the day in the house. Chanwoo and Jinwhan played video games the whole afternoon. Yunhyeong didn’t come out of his room until he was done organizing his stuff. Hanbin and Junhoe slept the whole time.

The guys were sat together on one end of the long dining table and the oldies were on the other side. After dinner, they move to the living room and continue to drink there while the oldies were having fun laughing and chatting at the dining area.  
Hanbin’s mom gets up to check on Hanbyul in the room upstairs. She passes by the guys talking and drinking in the living room and she overhears them talking about Bobby while she was on her way upstairs.

“I asked Bobby to come but he couldn’t be convinced.” Jinhwan says.

“He still hates his parents that much huh?” Yunhyoeng asks.

“It’s been three years I don’t get why he’s still so mad. It’s his family.” Chanwoo says.

“Maybe he’s just an asshole.” Junhoe says.

“What are you so mad about?” Yunhyeong asks.

“I’m not mad. And I said ‘maybe’” Junhoe shrugs.

They move on from talking about Bobby. Hanbin decides to go upstairs to check up on Hanbyul too so that his mom can come down and have fun with the others. The door to his parent’s room was half open. He walks towards it and he overhears his mom talking to someone on the phone. He doesn’t go in since he didn’t want to disturb his mom’s conversation so he waits outside but he can’t help overhear what his mom was saying.

“You haven’t told anyone?” his mom asks the person on the other side of the phone. 

Hanbin gets curious.

“Okay. Hanbin can never know, Jiwon ah.” His mom says.

He wasn’t listening purposely at first but he opens the door wide open when he hears his name.

“What can’t I know?” Hanbin asks. He didn’t know what his mom was talking about but he was enraged.

Hanbin’s mom’s in shock. “I’ll call you later.” She tells the person on the other line but she fails to drop the call. She was already so nervous.

“Mom I’m asking you what can’t I know?!” Hanbin says a little louder this time. 

Hanbyul was sleeping so Hanbin’s mom drags his outside and they enter another room.

“Hanbin ah I can explain.” She says with tears flowing from her eyes.

“Was that Bobby? Were you the reason why he left?!” Hanbin’s so mad he can’t control his voice.

Hanbin’s mom holds both his hands but Hanbin pushes them away. 

“Why?! What has he ever done to you or to me that you would make him leave? Huh mom?! What?!”

“Baby please I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. The scandal, it was big and you were already known to the public and it was starting to affect your career and..” Hanbin’s mom was crying so hard.

“What you cared about my image more than me or Bobby who you treated as a son for years?! Mom you watched me cry for months and months. I cried to you and I came to you but turns out you were behind everything! You listened to me as I blamed myself. You saw how I lost it yet you said nothing!! Nothing!!” Hanbin was already crying too. Never did he think his mom could do this. He was hurt and betrayed.

His mom couldn’t say anything. She was embarrassed of what she did. Though all she ever wanted to do was protect Hanbin. She knew how cruel the world was and he didn’t want his son to go through it. Without realizing, she was the one who hurt him the most.

Hanbin’s father comes inside confused. He takes Hanbin’s mom in his arms to stop her from crying. 

“What happened?” he asks Hanbin. 

Hanbin was wiping away his tears. His eyes were still glaring at his mom. 

“You didn’t know about this?” he asks his dad angrily.

“Know what? What are you talking about why are you so mad?” his dad asks. His dad had nothing to do about this.

“Ask your wife.” Hanbin says and leaves the room. He bangs he door and he runs downstairs. His mom tries to catch up to him but Hanbin’s dad stops her. 

Hanbin takes his coat at the closet by the door and rushes out of the house. 

Everyone downstairs had no clue what was going on. The guys get up and take their coats from the closet and they follow Hanbin out. Junhoe catches up to him and runs until he’s in front of Hanbin. 

“What happened?” he asks. “Why are you crying?” 

The guys surround Hanbin but Hanbin tries to leave. He walks away and Jinhwan grabs his arm. Hanbin looks back and looks at Jinhwan. “Let me go.” He says with so much hate and sadness in his eyes. Chanwoo takes Jinhwan’s hand away from Hanbin’s arm. “Let him go.” He says calmly. Hanbin walks away from everyone and the others don’t follow anymore. “Give him time. He’ll tell us when he’s ready.” They all agree and they watch Hanbin walk away until he’s out of their sight.

Bobby heard everything Hanbin and his mom fought about. He doesn’t think, he goes to his room and unlocks a drawer. He takes a bunch of envelopes tied together and puts them inside his sweatshirt pocket. He takes his wallet, his coat, and he drives to the airport. Every flight was booked but good thing he had connections to the management. He takes the first flight available to Paris. It was the longest 12 hours of his life.

When he reaches Paris, he calls Jinhwan. Jinhwan informs him that Hanbin has not come back since he left the night before. He asks for Hanbin’s number and he calls it but of course, Hanbin didn’t answer. He thought of every place Hanbin could be at and he searches. He went to all his favourite café’s but it was Christmas day so they were all closed. He remembers how much Hanbin loved paintings so he goes to Musée d’Orsay. He searches the whole place but he wasn’t there. He travels to Gare du Nord. Hanbin could’ve taken the train to somewhere already. He loses hope. He sits by the bench and he thinks of one more place Hanbin could be in. He knew it was impossible that he was still in Paris but he tries his luck in Bibliothèque Mazarine. This was the oldest library in Paris and Hanbin always spent one whole day there whenever they were in the city.

As Bobby enters the library, a few people were in. There were a number of tables from the entrance to the back and at the very end table, he sees a guy sitting still. His back was facing him. He was praying it was Hanbin while he walked to the end. As he got nearer he smiles. It was Hanbin.

Hanbin was seated at the edge of the table. Bobby takes seat at the other edge. Hanbin doesn’t look or move. He was staring blankly at the book in front of him.

“I remembered how much you loved the smell of old books.” Bobby says. Hanbin hears him but he doesn’t look at him. “It’s Christmas day. You shouldn’t be alone.” He says again.

Hanbin was crying silently. He wipes away his tears so Bobby doesn’t notice but Bobby does. He stands up from where he was sitting and he takes a seat beside Hanbin. “I’m sorry you had to find out like this.” Bobby says. Hanbin cries a little harder. He felt hurt, he felt betrayed, he felt ashamed, and he felt sorry. A bunch of emotions were overtaking him. Hanbin gets up and starts to leave the library. Bobby doesn’t stop him, instead he follows him. Hanbin was wiping tears as he was walking. 

Hanbin continues to walk the streets of Paris and Bobby follows behind him patiently. They reach outside of the house and Hanbin goes in. Everyone was at the living room waiting for him. Bobby follows from behind. They were all stunned to see Bobby.

Hanbin goes upstairs. Bobby follows him without having the chance to greet anyone. Hanbin enters his room and slams the door shut but Bobby catches it before it closes. He enters the room and locks it. Hanbin takes off his coat and sits at the couch. He looks at Bobby with tears still falling from his eyes. Bobby walks to him and he crouches down in front of Hanbin. He takes Hanbin’s hand and he brings them to his mouth. Hanbin was trembling so he kisses them. Then he wipes away Hanbin’s tears but this makes Hanbin cry harder. Bobby’s tears start to fall too.

Bobby doesn’t say anything. He stands up and he pulls Hanbin up with him. He wipes away Hanbin’s tears and he hugs him. They both cry but this time, in each other’s arms. 

After a few minutes of trying to calm Hanbin down, they both sit together in the couch in silence for a while until Hanbin was ready to ask questions.

“Why didn’t you just tell me? Hanbin asks out of the blue.

“I’d rather you hate me than you hate your mom.” Bobby answers.

“I hate you both now so same thing.” 

“You weren’t supposed to find out this way.”

“Was I ever supposed to find out?”

“No. That’s why I stayed away. Even from our friends. I saw this coming when Jinhwan showed up in my house a few weeks ago. But I couldn’t stay away anymore. I’m sorry.”

“You left like we meant nothing to you.” Hanbin states.

“I left because you were everything to me. And I wouldn’t forgive myself if I had put you and your career in a bad light because of me.”

“But you meant so much more to me than my career.” Hanbin says sincerely.

“I didn’t think I was worth sacrificing your career for.”

This conversation was cruel. It hurt straight to the core. They stay quiet for a while again.

“Why cut contact with you family too? You didn’t even know Jiun hyung had a baby.”

“I left because I hated them for lying to me. And if I went back, I knew you would ask them about me and they’d give you contact and I never would’ve been able to stay away.”

“What did my mom tell you exactly?”

“To stay away and not say a word to anyone. You were at the peak of your career and this scandal was gonna affect it so bad. And that they were gonna help pay off my dad’s debt. They did. My dad’s back mostly because of your parents help.” 

Bobby was the type of guy who would do everything for his family and Hanbin knew that.

“Why didn’t you come back when everything went back to normal? I waited. I waited for so long.”

“I didn’t know how to face you. I didn’t know how to face the guys. I didn’t know what to say. I had to keep what happened between me and your mom a secret and you of all people know how bad of a liar I am. I was afraid you’d find out.”

“And now that I found out what happens?”

Bobby doesn’t know what to say. He thought that he could stay away forever and keep this with him to his grave. 

“If Jinhwan hadn’t showed up in your house, would you try to come back?” Hanbin asks again.

“I didn’t try to come back and I don’t think I would. But I tried to be with you even from afar. I followed you for as long as I can. I think it even got inappropriate.” Bobby states and laughs a bit. “Until your 2nd album launch last year. I just had come back to Korea from London. You held a private party at APT Club and after performing you were thanking everyone who helped you and inspired you. You named your producers and your boss and our friends and you looked so happy. Genuinely happy. And after seeing you that happy, it felt as if a huge rock was lifted on top of me. That’s when I decided to let go. You were okay and the guys were okay. And I thought I needed to be okay too.”

Hanbin was crying again. All this time, he thought that when Bobby left, he left everything with him. He didn’t know he still cared. He didn’t know he followed them around. He didn’t know what Bobby went through. He didn’t know Bobby had it hard the way he had it hard. He felt so bad and he felt so hurt. He hated that this needed to happen to them.

“And Donghyuk?”

“Donghyuk... He brought me back to life. He was there when I was drinking myself to death my first year in London. He never asked questions about my past. He waited until I was ready to tell him. He was working in LA but he flew back to London every chance he got just to make sure I was okay. He chased me for two years. He loved me even through my darkest days. I didn’t let him in until last year. Until I decided to let you go. He took what was broken, kept it and made it whole again.” Bobby says with tears flowing for his eyes. 

“You love him?” Hanbin didn’t know if he was ready to hear the answer but he knew he needed to know. He kept telling himself and the people around him that he was over Bobby but he knew he wasn’t and maybe if he found out the answer to his question, he too would have to courage to let him go completely. 

“Very much.” Bobby answers honestly. Hanbin tilts his head up and he cries so hard. He wipes away his tears and he tries his best to stop. 

“I’m sorry.” Bobby was crying hard too.

They both give each other time to let all the emotions out. They both cry silently beside each other.

“Why haven’t you told him about me yet?” Hanbin asks as he wiped away tears from his eyes.

“I don’t know. I didn’t see the need to bring up the past. Do you think I should tell him?” Bobby asks.

“You don’t want him to find out like this right?” Hanbin laughs. “Tell him. And if you plan to stick around, he has to know.”

Bobby nods. Hanbin takes a deep breath and starts talking again.

“It took a long time for me to admit that we were over. And as time went by, I realized I wasn’t ready to admit that we were because we never really were. Our relationship was left hanging for the longest time. And I guess now is the right time to officially end it?” Hanbin laughs and cries at the same time. 

Bobby couldn’t stop his tears from falling. Hanbin wipes away Bobby's tears and he rubs Bobby's cheeks with the back of his finger softly . “I’m sorry that this needed to happen to us. I’m sorry we both had to go through all of that. I’m sorry I didn’t realize how hard it was for you too. I’m sorry I didn’t try hard enough to look for you. I’m sorry I didn’t try hard enough to find out why you left. I’m sorry hate got to me. I’m sorry about my mom. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me the most. I’m sorry, Jiwonie. I am so sorry.” Hanbin wipes away the tears from Bobby’s cheeks and Bobby did the same to Hanbin. They were both sobbing.

“Kim Jiwon, I am where I am now because of you. From the moment I realized my love for music, you were nothing but supportive. You helped me realize how important it was to pursue my passion and you gave me the courage to fight for it. You inspired me and motivated me. I believed I can do it because you believed I can. You always made sure I didn’t fall and when I did you were right beside me to pick me up.” Bobby is crying so much harder than Hanbin now.

“I’m always gonna love you, Kim Jiwon. Always.” Hanbin says as sincere as he can.

Bobby doesn’t say anything. He pulls Hanbin in and he hugs him tight. Hanbin hugs him back and they both cry in each other’s arms. They pull away and Bobby takes Hanbin’s face in his hands. Hi wipes away Hanbin’s tears and he kisses him in the cheek. He pulls him in again and he hugs him one last time. They pull away and Hanbin looks at his watch. “There’s a few hours left until Christmas is over. Do you want to spend it with the family?” He asks Bobby. Bobby smiles and nods. 

Bobby gets up and pulls out the bunch of envelops tied together from his pocket. 

“Letters. Everything I wanted to say to you ever since I left is in there. You can read them. Or don’t. But they’re yours.” Bobby says. Hanbin was touched. He takes them and he keeps them in his luggage. “When I’m ready.” He says and Bobby nods.

They both take deep breaths before they decide to go out. Hanbin opens the door and Bobby holds his hand from behind. 

Hanbin looks at Bobby in the eye and Bobby says, “I’m always gonna love you too, Hanbinnie. Always.” Hanbin grips Bobby’s hand and he smiles at him. And it was the sweetest smile Bobby had missed most. 

It’s been hours since they arrived and locked themselves up in the room. Their families were downstairs waiting. 

Yunhyeong’s parents had prepared tea for everyone. Hanbin’s mom was still so upset and cried every now and then. Chanwoo and Junhoe were distracting Hanbyul and were playing video games at the living room. Jinhwan and Yunhyeong were at the dining area wondering what was happening between the two.

Hanbin lead the way downstairs and Bobby followed. Their eyes were puffy. Hanbin’s mom starts crying again and Hanbin walks to her and hugs her. “I’m so sorry my son. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.” Her mom cries. “Sshhh.” Hanbin rubs the back of her head. “We’ll talk at home. I love you.” he tells her. Hanbin’s mom cries harder. Hanbin continues to hug his mom until she stops crying.

Bobby walks to his mom too and gives her the tightest hug. His mom was crying so hard too. It was the first time in three years. Bobby apologizes and promises to never do it again. He hugs his dad and he hugs both his sister in law and Jiun. 

Yunhyeong and Jinhwan was both crying at what they were witnessing. It was emotional but it was also so heartwarming.

“There’s still a few hours left of Christmas. What do we do?” Hanbin asks loudly so that everyone in the house could hear. 

“Let’s eat!” Bobby shouts and raises his arm up in the air.

“I’m on it!” Yunhyeong’s dad shouts from the kitchen and they all laugh. He prepares a simpler dinner than they had the night before. 

Hanbin and Bobby went around to greet and apologize to everyone especially the oldies. They go hugging each other. They were all a family and everyone felt better that they could end Christmas day on a good note.

While the oldies prepared supper, the guys were in the living room taking their moment to hug and apologize to each other too. Bobby was laughing at Yunhyeong for still crying then they group hug squishing Yunhyeong in the middle. They talked about everything and Bobby explained his part. They were old enough to understand the situation. They just felt bad for Bobby because they hated him and judged him without even knowing the truth. They said their apologies and they promised that it will not happen again. The worst situations may come, they promised to tell each other about it.  
They all had a lot of catching up together especially Bobby and his parents. They all talk about what Bobby have been doing alone and Bobby shares what he’s been up to. The dinner table was full of laughter and love. It was a Merry Christmas after all.

*insert tweets*

It was a very long day for everyone so after dinner, gift giving and a few drinks, they all decide to call it a night. Hanbin was in charge of the dishes so he was the last one up. He turns off the lights in the first floor but he notices someone by the terrace. He goes out to check out who it was. Junhoe was sitting alone sipping from his glass of wine looking at the Eiffel Tower twinkle its lights. 

“Hey, I didn’t know you were still up.” Hanbin says when he peeps through the terrace doors.

“I don’t feel sleepy yet.” He looks at Hanbin and looks back at the view.

Hanbin takes a seat at one of the coffee table chairs across Junhoe.

“What a day right?” he asks and laughs.

“Yeah. Crazy.” Junhoe says. “So, are you okay?” he adds.

“Well, we’re finally broken up.” Hanbin laughs. “I don’t know. It’s too much to take in; knowing the truth and letting go.”

“So all is forgiven?”

“Forgiven, yes. I guess? I don’t know. But right now I don’t feel bitter about it. I’m happy to have him back especially with his family. I’m happy my parents and his parents got to talk about it. I’m happy he finally met Raon. I’m happy he’s here with us.”

“You’re happy for him but are you happy for yourself?” Junhoe asks seriously.

Hanbin looks at him and smiles. “I guess there’s no reason not to be.”

Junhoe nods. Hanbin was still in love with Bobby after all these years. Bobby’s happiness has always been Hanbin’s priority and this hasn’t changed. He smiles at Hanbin but he hurts for him.

“I’m beat I’m gonna go in and sleep now. Will you be okay alone?” Hanbin asks.

“Yeah. Coming in in a few. You go ahead.”

“Merry Christmas, Juneya. Good night.”

“Good night, Hanbinnie. Merry Christmas.”

UPDATE 6

After a few more days in Paris, the guys fly to London while their parents fly back home because of work. Bobby was supposed to fly back with his parents to Korea and wait for Donghyuk to come home but since he was already there, he decided to go with the others. And he knew he needed to talk to him and tell him everything. 

Bobby and the 5 other guys go their separate ways when they reach Heathrow. The guys had a private car service and they offered to drop off Bobby at Donghyuk’s but he insisted to take the shuttle. When he gets to Donghyuk’s house, he calls him and tells him to go out. Donghyuk was confused as to why but he does it anyway. When he peeks through the peephole, he sees Bobby standing at the bottom of the staircase. He unlocks the door and he runs down excitedly. Bobby welcomes him with open arms and Donghyuk wraps his arms around Bobby’s neck. He lifts Donghyuk up and he kisses the side of his head. “I missed you.” he whispers. 

Donghyuk pulls away and kisses Bobby on the lips with his arms still wrapped around his neck. “Where were you?! Are you aware you haven’t called me in three days?! It only takes 13 hours from Korea to London where have you been?! I was so worried.” He pouts.

Bobby’s expression changes. “About that… I need to talk to you.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah everything’s fine. I just.. I was with my family. In Paris actually. It’s a long story but I’m here to tell you about it. I mean everything. I think it’s time you know everything about me.” Bobby explains.

Bobby was a closed book but Donghyuk didn’t mind. He was good to him and it was enough for him. He didn’t know what to expect but he was nervous. It was the first time Bobby was going to talk about his family. “Nobody’s home right now we can talk inside.” Donghyuk offers.

“I was thinking we go for a walk? And some hot cocoa? Just like old times.” Bobby suggests. This got Donghyuk excited. 

“I’d love to. Give me your bag. I’ll just go get a coat. Wait here.” Donghyuk runs up and takes his coat and a scarf for Bobby. He goes back down and wraps the scarf around Bobby’s neck. He takes his hand and they walk hand in hand. 

“It’s gonna be a long story.” Bobby informs him.

“Are you kidding me? I waited so long for this it can take the whole night I wouldn’t mind.” He laughs.

Bobby takes a deep breath and he starts to talk. 

“Three years ago when you met me I was running away. I was running away from home, my family, my friends and someone who I was in a relationship with. I was running away because three years ago I had to leave those people. I had to leave my boyfriend of three years, my studies, my best friends, basically my whole life. But what I didn’t know was I didn’t really have to leave. My father was, well he is again now, a very wealthy man. But three years ago he was charged with embezzlement. My family tricked me into moving to the states with them only to find out we did it because my father was running away. He was running away from the issue. I don’t know if you’ve heard of it but my father owns LOTTE Corporation so everyone in Korea knew him and everyone was talking about it. It was huge. It was a scandal.” 

Donghyuk was appalled. “You’re a chaebol?! What the fuck babe! Are you kidding me?! Your family owns LOTTE do you know how big that is? Do you realize how rich you are?!” he was so amused.

“Babe I just said he was charged with embezzlement and all you got was that he owned LOTTE. Please concentrate.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry it’s just that… You don’t look like you’re rich, babe.” Bobby glares at him and he laughs. 

“Because I’m not. My parents are. Now can I go back?” 

“Yes I’m sorry I’ll keep the reactions to myself.”

“When we arrived, the news blew up. People were calling me and sending me news articles. It was chaotic. I asked my parents if they were true and they were. I fought with my parents. There was yelling and crying. I hated them for not telling me so I ran away. I went back to the airport and took the first flight home. I wanted to go home to Hanbin. Hanbin was my boyfriend.” Things get a little serious. “I knew it was a stupid and reckless decision and I know they were only looking out for me but all I could think about that time was how much I needed him. How much I needed Hanbin. I needed to talk to him. I needed to see him. I needed him to tell me that everything was going to be okay. I needed to hear his voice. I needed to calm down and he was the only one who could help me do that.” Bobby takes a deep breath again. 

They arrive at their go-to café and they order their hot cocoas. They take a seat at the table in the corner of the café. It was secluded so they had privacy. Bobby continued with his story. “When I arrived, Hanbin’s mom was the one to pick me up from the airport. My parents must’ve called her to fetch me. It was going to be chaotic if the reporters knew I was back so she came with security to assist me to the car. She was waiting inside and I was expecting Hanbin to be there but he wasn’t. I thought maybe he was busy because his album just came out.”

“Album? He’s an artist?” Donghyuk asks innocently.

“BI. Hanbin is BI.” He tells him.

Donghyuk doesn’t know how to react. He was a fan of BI’s music and he knew how the lyrics were and now he finds out that maybe those lyrics are for Bobby. But he needed to hear the whole story so he pushes the thought aside and listen to Bobby more.

“As we were driving, she tells me how bad the situation was and that I shouldn’t have gone back. But she told me not to worry for they will help my father pay off his debt. And while she was telling me all of this stuff she asked for a favor. She asked if I could stay away from Hanbin for a while. People knew we were dating so Hanbin’s name got dragged into the mess and it wasn’t good for his image. His mom gave me a few days to think about it. I told her I’d do it and that I’d go back to my family to the States but I didn’t take the flight back. I hated everyone. I hated my parents, I hated Hanbin’s parents, I hated that I had to leave, I hated that I couldn’t even say goodbye. So I decided to disappear and that’s when I came here.” 

“Hanbin, Jinhwan, Junhoe, Chanwoo, Yunhyeong and I grew up together. Our parents were best friends so that made us best friends. When I left, I cut contact with everyone. I didn’t leave anyone behind because if one knew where I was, they would all find out for sure. It was the hardest decision of my life. After cutting contact, I followed them around like a total creep. It was a tradition for our families to celebrate Christmas together and away from Seoul. The first year I left, they spent Christmas in New York. I flew there and followed them around from a far. I watched them from meters away. I did it for a very long time. I missed them and I missed him, I was about to go crazy." 

"I read every news article he was in, I listened to every song he released, I watched every interview and every show, I went to watch him perform live every chance I got, I was skipping classes to catch up to him. I wrote him letters every time I thought about him or if I saw something that reminded me of him or even when I missed him which was very often. I drank myself to death every night hoping the next day I’d be over him or I wouldn’t think about him anymore. I called him from payphone’s just so that I could hear his voice and one word from him was enough to get me through the day. Creepy right?” Bobby laughs and Donghyuk laughs a bit with him.

“And on one of those nights I was trying to forget, you found me. And then slowly, life started to get brighter again. I was living in the darkness for the longest time and you dragged me out to see the sun again. I started laughing again. I may have been mean at times and I may have not showed how much I appreciated you that time but I did. I remember every single thing you did and said to me that helped me be better. Every call you made to wake me up so that I wouldn’t miss class. Every meal you brought me when I told you I haven’t eaten yet. Every flight you took from LA to London just to make sure I was okay. You did all that for more than a year and I don’t even remember if there was anything I did to give back but I am so, so grateful for every single thing. May it be the big one or the small one.” Donghyuk was already crying. 

 

“Last year, when I moved back to Korea, before we got together, I went to visit Hanbin one last time. He was having his 2nd album launch at a club in Gangnam. I watched him perform his songs and I watched him celebrate with his fans and friends. And before the night needed, he made a speech. He thanked his company, his CEO, his co-producers, his family, and our friends. And as he did, I watched him and he looked happy. He looked so happy. It was the look he had when his parents agreed for him to sign with his company. It was the look he had when his sister was born. It was the look he had when his first solo was released. It was the look he had after his first concert. And it was the look he had when I first told him I loved him."

"He was happy and it was so real and genuine. So I thought it was time to let go. It was time to let him go and it was time to let my old life go. I decided to let go of the people who didn’t care anymore and to let in the people who did.” Bobby gives Donghyuk a sad smile. 

“And then I went to fetch you in London with the biggest hope that you’d come with me back to Korea and you did. After that I promised myself that I’ll never look back again and focus on you and our future and so far it’s been great. I hope it’s been great for you too.” Donghyuk smiles and nods. Tears were still flowing from his eyes.

“When Jinani showed up our doorstep, I didn’t know what to do. I honestly thought of not going out of the room. And then I thought maybe I should just talk to him and tell him to not show up anymore and that I was living just fine. But when I saw him, I felt to do the opposite. I felt the urge to hug him and to tell him I missed him and to ask how he was. And at that time I knew I was fucked. I knew the more I allowed them in, the truth would come out any sooner. But I couldn’t stay away.” 

“On Christmas Eve, Hanbin’s mom called me from Paris. They were all there celebrating. She asked if I have told anyone. She must’ve heard that I’ve been meeting with the guys again or the guys were probably talking about me so she got worried. But while we were on the phone, Hanbin overheard our conversation.” 

Donghyuk was in a bit of a shock and covers his mouth with his hands. 

“Hanbin figured everything out. He got so mad his mother was crying. I know because his mom didn’t cancel our call so I heard their conversation. Without thinking, I left home and flew to Paris. I had to look for Hanbin and when I did we talked, just the two of us. I explained to him everything that happened. We said our apologies and we said our goodbyes. The past three days I was in Paris with my family and my friends. There was a lot of talking and explaining and crying and apologies but it was also full of laughter and love. I finally got to meet my brother’s son.” He smiles at the thought of Raon.

“So, that’s my story.” Bobby says shyly. Donghyuk smiles and releases a breath. 

“Well it’s interesting.” He says. “I’m hungry.” He adds. 

He stands up from the table and takes his coat. He gets up and goes out of the café. Bobby was expecting this reaction so he doesn’t push him instead he follows him. Donghyuk hails a cab and gets in. bobby gets in right after and Donghyuk dictates their favourite restaurant. Once they arrive, they take a seat and order. It was quiet. Donghyuk didn’t say anything and Bobby didn’t force him. He was just worried.

“Do you hate me?” Bobby asks. 

“No.” 

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

Their food arrives and they eat in peace. 

Nobody says a word until they finish eating. Donghyuk pays for their meal and they head out the restaurant. Donghyuk holds Bobby’s hand and they walk home.

When they arrive at Donghyuk’s doorstep, Donghyuk looks at Bobby. “When do you fly back home?” he asks.

“I can go anytime.” His family’s jet was just waiting for him at the airport.

“I need time.” Donghyuk says. “I mean it’s too much. I can’t process everything. And you being here isn’t gonna help. I’m sorry I’m not that understanding. It’s just that…”  
Donghyuk was talking so fast Bobby stops him. 

“Hey, hey, hey it’s okay. Sshhh. Baby it’s okay. I understand. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you earlier. I’m sorry. Take all the time you need and I’ll be in our home waiting. Okay?” Bobby says calmly. 

Donghyuk wraps his arms around Bobby’s neck and Bobby wraps his on Donghyuk’s waist. Donghyuk leans in and kisses Bobby on the lips. Bobby kisses him back this time longer. 

“I love you.” Donghyuk tells him.

“I love you too.” Bobby responds and leaves one more peck on Donghyuk’s lips.

Donghyuk pulls away and goes in their house to get Bobby’s bag which he borrowed from Yunhyeong. He says his goodbye and Bobby leaves for the airport.

*back in korea*  
*post vacation pics*

After London, Prague, and Amsterdam, the boys were back in Korea. And just a day after their vacation, they were back to work. Hanbin had one more week left of his leave.

*insert texts from jaeho*

Hanbin decides to spend his days at home. He needed time to bond with his mom after what happened. They needed healing time. While he was there, he drove Hanbyul to school and picked her up. Before they went home, they usually ate out or go shopping.

*new day*

Hanbyul only had morning classes so Hanbin decides to pick her up and surprise her with a theme park date. Hanbyul gets in Hanbin’s car and Hanbin puts on her seatbelt for her. “We’re going somewhere nice wanna take a guess where?” 

“Hello Kitty café?” Hanbyul asks.

“Nope. Somewhere much nicer!” Hanbin says excitedly.

“Everland?” Hanbyul squeals.

Hanbin covers his right ear. “Aniyo we can’t go there it’s competition Bobby’s appa will get mad at us. We’re going to LOTTE World yaaaay!” 

“But my friends say Everland is better.” Hanbyul says kinda disappointed.

“It’s because they haven’t been to LOTTE World. I’ll show you how much nicer it is okay?” Hanbin says to cheer her up.

“Okay! But oppa I’m hungry!” 

“We can go eat first. What do you want to eat?”

“At Yunhyeong oppa’s restaurant.” 

Hanbyul loved the risotto in Yunhyeong’s restaurant so Hanbin knew what she was talking about. “You have an expensive mouth but since you’re my princess, at Yunhyeong’s restaurant we’ll eat!” They both cheer and drive to the restaurant.

Yunhyeong wasn’t around when they came. They take a seat at a table for two and they order. While they wait, Hanbyul notices someone come in. Hanbin’s back was faced to the door so he didn’t notice. 

“Oh! Bobby oppa!” Hanbyul says a little loudly it gets Bobby’s attention.

Bobby smiles at her and walks towards their table. “Hey you.” he says to Hanbyul and pinches her nose softly. She gets up and gives him a hug. She’s always loved Bobby.

“You alone?” Hanbin asks.

“Yeah. I see you’re having a date.” Bobby says. “Mind if I crash? I hate eating alone.”

“Hanbin pulls out a chair for Bobby and Bobby takes a seat.

“We’re going to LOTTE World after!” Hanbyul shows off.

“Wow!” Bobby says and laughs at her cuteness.

“She wanted to go to Everland.” Hanbin tells Bobby and laughs.

“No. Everland isn’t nice.” Bobby says laughing.

“Come with us Bobby oppa it will be fun!” Hanbyul invites him.

“Should i?” he asks Hanbyul and he looks at Hanbin. Hanbin only shrugs. 

“Okay I’ll go. What rides are we riding?” he asks Hanbyul.

The two talk about their planned activity excitedly. Bobby was busy with Hanbyul so he orders for him. He watches them talk and laugh and it melts his heart. He’s happy and sad at the same time.

Their food arrives and they eat together. Hanbin always became a third wheel when Bobby was around him and Hanbyul but he didn’t mind. Bobby had the same amount of love for Hanbyul as Hanbin did. Hanbyul almost didn’t remember Bobby in Paris so Bobby made an effort to play with her when they were there. 

After lunch, they decide to use one car instead of going in two. Hanbin was using his Chevrolet Corvette which was a sports car that only had room for two so they decide to use Bobby’s BMW M3. They leave Hanbin’s car in Yunhyeong’s parking lot and they drive off to Jamsil-dong. 

The first thing they do when they arrive is get headbands. Hanbyul picks the boys’ headbands and they were very willing to wear them. Hanbyul wanted to ride the extreme rollercoasters but she was still too small for it so they decide to do the bumper cars. Then they make Hanbyul ride the merry-go-round which she was embarrassed about. She saw herself as a big girl already so she was thinking the merry-go-round didn’t suit her anymore. 

“Where’s Donghyuk?” Hanbin asks while they waited for Hanbyul’s ride to be over.

“London.” Bobby responds as he waved to Hanbyul back.

“Still?”  
“Yeah. He says he needed time to think.”

“About what?”

“I told him everything.”

“What does he need to think about?”

Bobby thinks. “I don’t know.”

Hanbin doesn’t say anymore.

“Well I sort of lied to him the whole time we were together.” 

“Why didn’t you just tell him?”

“He never asked.”

“Then you didn’t lie.”

“Not saying is still lying.”

Hanbin wasn’t sure if he agreed but he nods.

“How about you? You didn’t date anyone in those three years?”

“I didn’t really have the time to date.” Hanbin laughs.

“You’d find time if you really wanted to.”

“I guess I didn’t want to.”

Nobody says a word after. Hanbyul gets off from the ride then they go do more activities until she was tired. 

Hanbyul was tired she fell asleep in the back of the car. It was a silent drive back with only the radio playing. Then BI’s Goodbye Road plays. After the first verse, Hanbin turns off the radio. 

“Why’d you turn it off it was a nice song.” Bobby says teasingly.

“Shut up.” Hanbin was starting to turn red.

“Was that about me?” Bobby continued to tease Hanbin.

“Aniyo. It was about my other ex.”

“Oh you had another ex?”

“Yeah. He was tall and good looking and smart and funny. You would’ve liked him.” 

“Sounds like an asshole to me.” Bobby says. Hanbin laughs.

“He was.”

“Do you still hate him?”

Hanbin looks at Bobby. “Nope.”

Bobby looks at Hanbin and smiles.

“Well he’s lucky he gets a song from the one and only BI.” Bobby laughs.

“Oh hell he is.”

“Can I turn on the radio now?” 

“Don’t you dare.” Hanbin swears.

“Why don’t you just sing it now? It sounds better live anyway.”

This quiets Hanbin. He performed this song live once only. And when he did, he was crying so hard while he was singing. Bobby was already in London then. It was almost a year after he left. 

“You went to my concert?” Hanbin asks seriously.

Bobby couldn’t deny it anymore. “Uhm, yeah.”

This changes Hanbin’s mood. They both don’t say anything more until they arrive Yunhyeong’s. 

Hanbin wakes Hanbyul up and luckily she was in a good mood when she wakes. They get out of the car and while they do, Junhoe gets out from his car from the other side of the parking lot. Hanbyul sees Junhoe and runs to him “Junhoe oppa!” she screams happily. Junhoe lifts her up from the ground and carries her. He gives her a peck on the cheek and says, “Well hello my little lady. Where have you been?”

“LOTTE World.” She says. He looks at Hanbin and sees Bobby come out from the car Hanbin went out of. 

“With Bobby oppa?” Junhoe asks. Hanbyul nods. 

Everyone was able to resolve their issues in Paris except for Junhoe and Bobby. Junhoe avoided talking to Bobby. He knew about the truth but there was still something about Bobby he hated. 

Hanbin walks up to Junhoe and Hanbyul and smiles. “Hey. Here to eat?” Hanbin asks.

“Yeah. I was gonna order takeout but since you’re already here, wanna go eat together instead?”

“I want risotto.” Hanbyul says. 

“You had risotto earlier.” Hanbin says. 

“I want more.” She pleads. 

“Then risotto she’s gonna get.” Junhoe says. He puts Hanbyul down and holds her hand. They walk in the restaurant ahead of Hanbin and Bobby. He nodded at Bobby but that was it. Hanbin walks to Bobby who was standing outside his car. 

“He still hates me.” Bobby says. 

Hanbin ignores Bobby’s statement. 

“We’re gonna have dinner. Wanna join us?” 

“No. it’s okay. I should probably head home.” Bobby says. 

Hanbin doesn’t insist. “Careful driving back.” 

“You too.”

Just as Bobby was about to get in his car, Yunhyeong car pulls up. “Hey what are you guys doing here?”

“Junhoe and Hanbyul are inside.” Hanbin says.

“I didn’t know we had plans.” Yunhyeong says. “And why are you together?” 

Bobby and Hanbin looks at each other. 

“We bumped into each other earlier then Hanbyul invited him to come to the theme park with us.” Hanbin says.

“Oh. Okay. Let’s go in I’ll prepare your dinner.”

“How lucky can we get to have a Michelin star chef make dinner for us?” Bobby teases.

“My rates are very high you better have money.” Yunhyeong says and laugh. 

They all go in the restaurant and sit at the table where Junhoe and Hanbyul was.

While they were eating, Jinhwan arrives at the restaurant. He notices the guys so he walks to them and he slaps Bobby in the head since he’s back was the one facing him. “What? Bobby comes back and I’m not invited to dinners anymore?” he says glaring at everyone at the table. 

“This just happened we didn’t talk about it. I’d be really amazed it Chanwoo walked in that door.” Hanbin says and everyone gets excited. 

Jinhwan takes a seat and calls for a waiter. He orders food for two. 

“You that hungry?”

Jinhwan had already actually invited Chanwoo to eat but he doesn’t say anything. a few minutes later, Chanwoo arrives. They all get excited and start cheering.

“WAHH WAAHH THIS IS AMAZING.” Yunhyeong was the most excited. “We all have one brain.” He adds.

"Daebak!" Junhoe says. 

Bobby was laughing so hard. He couldn't believe it either. 

Jinhwan laughs harder. “Yes you all do have the same brain because I invited him you dumbass.” 

“I thought it was gonne be the two of us only?” Chanwoo asks as he reaches the table.

“So you made plans without us?!” Junhoe says.

“I assumed you guys were busy.” Jinhwan shrugs. Bobby slaps his head back. “Ow!! Okay I deserved that.”

Hanbyul laughs at his oppa’s. Chanwoo takes a seat and pours wine at the empty glass. "Want some Hanbyulie?" he asks. And they all react. Hanbyul laughs. 

Hanbin and Bobby doesn't say another word to each other the whole time they were having dinner. 

After supper ended, they all go their separate ways. Junhoe walks Hanbyul to their car. He greets her good night and kisses her cheek. She gets in the car and waits for Hanbin to get in. 

"You okay? You were awfully quiet during dinner." Junhoe asks. 

"Do I have to be honest?" Hanbin asks back. 

"Not if you don't want to be."

"Then i'm fine." Hanbin smiles. 

"I'll take it." 

Junhoe opens the door for Hanbin and before Hanbin goes in he says, "If you're ready to be honest, I'll be here to listen." 

Hanbin smiles and nods. "Thank you. Drive safe."

"You too." 

Hanbin drives away and Junhoe leaves as soon as they're out of his sight. 

7TH UPDATE

When Hanbin and Hanbyul gets home, he tucks her to her bed, waits for her to fall asleep and kisses the top of her bed before moving to his room. He takes a hot shower and then he lies flat on his bed looking at the ceiling. He hasn’t been able to stop thinking about Bobby being at his concert. And then he remembers the letters. He remembers that that there were dates written on the envelops. He gets up and rushes to his luggage he brought to Paris and he takes out a small bag where he hid them. He unties the letters together and he looks for one dated August 12th, 2017. There wasn’t one but there was a letter dated the day after: August 13, 2017

He hesitates to open it. He thinks hard for a few minutes until his mom comes knocking in his door. He takes the letters, put them back inside the small bag and in his luggage. He opens the door. “Hey. You hungry?” his mom asks. “No. the guys and I had dinner with Hanbyulie.” He informs her. “Okay. But I am. Join me? Wine?” Hanbin smiles and nods.

They stay in their dining area and he watched his mom eat while he sipped wine. “Mom slowly you’re not in an eating contest.” He laughs. 

“I forgot to eat the whole day. What did you guys do today?”

“I brought her to LOTTE World. She had fun. She got mad when we forced her to ride the merry-go-round thought. She said she was too old for it.” Hanbin laughs.

“We?” his mom asks.

“Bobby.”

His mom raises her eyebrow.

“We bumped into him during lunch and Hanbyul invited her to come.”

His mom smiles and nods.

“Mom he has a boyfriend.”

“I didn’t say anything.” His mom raises both her hands in the air still trying to stop herself from smiling.

“He wouldn’t have a boyfriend if it weren’t for you though.” Hanbin says cheekily and laughs.

His mom slaps his arm and pouts. 

Hanbin gets up from his chair and stands behind her mom. He hugs her from behind, rests his head at his mom’s shoulder and says, “I was just kidding. I understand everything. I know it was something you needed to do and it was something he needed to do too. I forgive you and I’ve forgiven him.” he kisses her cheek. 

“You’re a good man.” She says as she rubs Hanbin’s face with her hand.

“I learned that I should never hate people from you.” 

Her mom laughs. “I raised you well.”

“Of course you did.” Hanbin says and pulls away. He sits back at his chair and he pours his mom wine. 

“Are you okay though?” his mom asks.

“I thought I was but I realized I still am not. But I will be.” He assures her.

“I’m sorry my son. I’m sorry I put you through this. I wish I could take it all away. I’m sorry I was cruel.” His mom says sincerely.

“You weren’t cruel. You were just being a mom.” He holds her hand on top of the table.

His mom tears up and Hanbin wipes it. 

They toast to the night and spend it talking more. Hanbin feels thankful all this happened because it’s gotten him closer to his mom than he ever was.

*days later*

Hanbin has gotten back to work and was back to being extremely busy. His friends had been getting dinner and drink every chance they got and Junhoe came to pick him up and drive him back to the company so that he can come even for a little while. Bobby had been present at every hang out they had. And when Donghyuk came back from London, he also always came to every dinner. Hanbin had a chance to meet him and get to know him and appreciate him too. 

Yunhyeong was busy preparing for his new restaurant which was about to open in a few days. He’s always been hands on to his projects. From the interior, to the menu, down to the chefs and waiters he was hiring. He was strict when it came to business.

*insert yh text to hanbin*

Yunhyeong prepared a soft opening for his family and friends. A few business partners and clients were there too.  
The guys were seated at one table and their parents at the table behind. 

Yunhyeong was so busy walking around entertaining guests. He drops by his friends’ table and asks, “Is Hanbin here yet?” They all shake their heads and he leaves again to talk to people he had invited.

*insert junhoe texts to hanbin*

Hanbin arrives a few minutes later. He greets the oldies at their table and he greets Yunhyeong at the kitchen. 

“Oh! You came! I was gonna hate you if you didn’t.” Yunhyeong says as he jumped around excitedly. 

“I promised you I would. Congratulations Yunhyeongie. I'm proud of you.” Hanbin says and rubs the top of Yunhyeong’s head. He walks out and sits beside Junhoe at their table. 

“What did I miss?” he asks as he’s seated.

“Chanwoo’s leaving us for two weeks.” Jinhwan says.

“Why where are you going?” Hanbin asks.

“Taipei. For business.” Chanwoo informs him.

“When are you leaving?” 

“Monday.” 

“Oh, good. I have a fan meet there next week. I have a few days free after I could stay if you’re not busy. I wanna go to the night market thingy.” Hanbin says.

“Sounds good. I have the weekends free.” Chanwoo says.

“Can you please stop doing that we have jobs and it makes me want to come too. My father’s never gonna give me the hospital if I’m always away.”

“Well I think it’s time you learn your priorities.” Junhoe says.

“But friendship is also a priority.” Jinhwan pouts.

Yunhyeong arrives at their table and takes a seat. “I’m tired. Give me that.” he points at the wine. Bobby hands the bottle to him and he pours himself a glass.

“I’m gonna be in Taipei next week to meet some suppliers. You guys can come with if you’re not busy. Their street food is amazing.” Yunhyeong says. They guys at the table all laugh at Jinhwan. 

“Screw it I’m going too!” Jinhwan says. “You come too Juneya! You too Bobby and Donghyuk. We’re all going.” 

“We’d love to come.” Bobby says. 

“Babe I can’t because of work but you go.” Donghyuk informs Bobby.

“Are you sure? I can stay with you.” Bobby says.

“No, no. You go! It’ll be fun.” He says. Bobby agrees. 

“I feel so irresponsible but this will be fun.” Jinhwan says.

They all plan out their trip as the food starts being served one by one. In the middle of dinner, Donghyuk needed to excuse himself. He said he was needed at the studio. Bobby offered to drive him but he insisted on going alone.

“Where was he going?” Chanwoo asks.

“Back to the studio.” Bobby answers and they all nod.

After the party was over, Donghyuk comes back to the restaurant. The guys were the only ones there still drinking wine and laughing at stories from the past. 

“Remember my birthday in Japan.” Bobby says. Everyone was already dying of laughter before he even continued to tell the story.

“Why what happened?” Donghyuk says laughing even though he didn’t know what was going on.

“I think it was my 22nd birthday, we went out to get drinks. And then when we got to the hotel, we continued to drink. We got so drunk we decided to take a bath together.” Bobby stops to laugh some more and everyone else was laughing. 

“We had a tub in our room but it was small even for two. But we made 4 fit in there. Me, Hanbinnie, Juneya, and Jinani.” 

“I still have the videos on my phone!!” Yunhyeong says laughing his ass out.

“NO! NO! NO! NO! Don’t you dare!” They all scream.

“Come on I want to see it!” Donghyuk says.

Yunyheong searches for the video on his phone and hands it to Donghyuk.

Donghyuk watches it awkwardly but he was still laughing so hard. The smile on his face slowly disappeared when he noticed Hanbin and Bobby being sweet in the video but he tried to not let them notice. 

Bobby remembers everything that happened in that video but he couldn’t pull it away because he didn’t want Donghyuk to think he was hiding something. He looks at Hanbin and Hanbin was thinking the same so he pulls it away from Donghyuk’s hand. They were all still laughing though. “That’s enough. TMI. TMI.” Hanbin says.

“So gross.” Chanwoo says.

They were all out of breath from laughing.  
“You guys are really really close huh?” Donghyuk says.

Everyone nods.

“It’s never boring.” Junhoe says. 

“I don’t know how we never run out of things to talk about and to do.” Jinhwan says.

“Right? Crazier because some of the stories we tell have been told a million times but we still laugh like it’s the first time we’ve heard it.” Yunhyeong says and they all laugh and agree.

“Maybe we’re just sad people.” Hanbin says.

“Maybe stop being so dramatic about everything.” Chanwoo says.

Hanbin shrugs and Junhoe rubs his hair. Hanbin scrunches his nose cutely at Junhoe and Junhoe pinches it lightly. He rests his arm at the back of Hanbin’s chair. Bobby was watching them the whole time. 

They stay an hour more and they decide to go home. Everyone had a couple drinks in their system so they decide to call for their drivers. Donghyuk didn’t have that much to drink so he was still able to drive.  
Yunhyeong’s driver arrives and he takes Jinhwan and Chanwoo with him. Junhoe and Hanbin waited for Jaeho manager to take them home.

Donghyuk had to go to the restroom so Bobby got in the car first. Junhoe was leaned in his car and Hanbin was standing in front of him. Bobby was watching them from the window of his car. Junhoe and Hanbin were talking about something and he could see how smitten Junhoe was at Hanbin. Junhoe takes his hand to Hanbin’s face and it seemed like he was getting an eyelash from his face. Bobby stops watching them and he looks down at his hands. 

“Sad.” Bobby whispers.

“Hmmm?” Donghyuk asks. Bobby didn’t even notice Donghyuk come in the car. 

“Let’s go home.” Bobby says and leans his head back at the head rest. He closes his eyes and Donghyuk starts to drive away from the restaurant.

*taipei*

They spend the day eating and eating some more. They walked the streets of Taipei, enjoyed the night market and even did games. It got hectic because Hanbin’s fans found out where they were so they decided to go back to the hotel.

Bobby tries to call Donghyuk but he couldn’t get through because the cell service was bad. He knocks at Chanwoo’s room and Chanwoo tells him that Hanbin’s room had the best cell service. Bobby walks to Hanbin’s room and knocks. 

Hanbin looks through the peephole and opens the door half naked. He had just finished taking a bath.

“Hey. This hotel has shitty cell service Chanwoo says your room has the best. Can I?” Bobby asks nicely.

Hanbin opens the door widely and welcomes Bobby in.

“By the window.” He tells him and sits at the edge of his bed and dries his hair with a towel.

“Thanks.” Bobby sits at the coffee table by the window and tries to call Donghyuk. He tries three times but this time it was Donghyuk who wasn’t answering. He gives up and sighs. Hanbin notices.

“You get through?” Hanbin asks.  
“No.” Bobby repsonds.

“Still no service?”

“No. Not answering. I think he’s asleep already.” Bobby says. Hanbin checks his phone and sees it was barely 9pm in Korea but he doesn’t push it.

“Everything okay between you?” Hanbin asks.

“Yeah. Why’d you ask?” Bobby asks.

“Nothing.”

“We both know it’s not nothing.”

“I don’t want to interfere.”

“Who says you’re interfering?”

Hanbin sighs. “I don’t know it seemed like something was bothering you when Donghyuk left during Yunhyeong’s party.” He says.

“You noticed?” Bobby laughs a bit. Hanbin nods. 

“I don’t know. He hasn’t been the same since he got back from London.” Bobby says.

“So it’s been a while.” Hanbin says and Bobby nods.

“Did you talk about it? Why he needed time and why it took so long for him to come back?” Hanbin asks.

“No. It didn’t seem like he wanted to talk about it so I didn’t ask.”

“How are you going to find out something’s wrong if you don’t communicate?”

Bobby shrugs. “I’m scared.”

“Scared of what?” Hanbin asks. Bobby hesitates to answer so Hanbin says, “It’s okay you’re not gonna hurt me anymore. I’m here as a friend.”

He releases a sigh. “I’m scared if I ask, he says something that will make me lose him.”

“Like what?”

“If he says he’s seeing someone else? Or if he says he’s not happy with me anymore? Or if he says I couldn’t be trusted because I’ve been lying to him? So many things I’m scared of.”

“I think you’re just overthinking stuff. Donghyuk doesn’t seem like a guy who’d cheat on you. And if he wasn’t happy, why is he still around? Maybe he really is just busy. Talk to him. Stop being scared. Ask him what’s wrong. Tell him what’s bothering you. Communicate. It always works. It worked for us before.” 

“You always know what to say.” Bobby tells him and smiles. Hanbin smiles at him back.

And then Hanbin’s phone rings. “Hmm Juneya? Arrasseo I’m coming. Bye.”

Bobby frowns at the thought of Hanbin staying the night at Junhoe’s room. He’s noticed they’ve been extremely close the past few weeks.

“Drinks at Jinhwan’s room everyone’s there let’s go.” Hanbin says and gets up from the bed. Bobby smiles.

“What are you smiling at?” Hanbin asks. Bobby didn’t realize he was smiling. 

“Oh. Nothing. Let’s go.” He says.  
Hanbin puts on a shirt and they walk to Jinhwan’s room together.

The others have already started drinking and playing spin the bottle.

“Hanbinnie your turn. Spin the bottle.” Yunhyeong says.

“Ahh this game is so lame can’t you think of anything else.” Hanbin complains as he sits in the middle of Jinhwan and Junhoe. Bobby sits across in between Chanwoo and Yunhyeong.

“Just spin it.” Chanwoo says and Hanbin obliges. 

The bottle’s neck pointed at Bobby so Hanbin had to ask him something.

“Hmmmmm.” Hanbin thinks. “When you left, who did you miss the most aside from me?” He asks.

They all laugh. “You better answer this properly if you don’t wanna die.” Jinhwan warns him.

Bobby gets stressed. He takes a shot of alcohol and answers. “Junhoe.”

They all laugh. They knew it was still awkward between the both of them. Junhoe says nothing but laughs.

“Okay kimbap. You spin.” Jinhwan orders him. Bobby spins the bottle and it points at Junhoe. They all laugh again.  
Bobby thinks for a second then asks, “Have you ever liked anyone of us? It doesn’t matter when it could be when we were in high school or whatever.”

Chanwoo complains. “We all know he liked Jinani before.”

“Aside from Jinhwan.” Bobby adds.

Junhoe stares at Hanbin for a long time and he looks back at the others.

“Nope. None of you are good enough for me.” He says cockily. 

They all throw a pillow at him at the same time.

They play for an hour more and then they decide to go back to their rooms and sleep.

Jinhwan got hungry so he decided to go out to the convenience store to buy ramen. When he steps out, he notices Junhoe and Hanbin outside Hanbin’s door at the end of the aisle. They were talking but Hanbin had his hands wrapped around Junhoe's waist and Junhoe’s hand was on Hanbin’s neck resting on his shoulder while his thumb caressed Hanbin’s cheek. He watches them for a while and he goes back inside his room when Junhoe was about to go back to his room. He waits for Junhoe to go in and he goes out again. He passes by their doors and head to the elevator.

*back in korea*

*Jinhwan texts hanbin*

Hanbin gets mad at Jinhwan. He storms out of his studio and drive to Han River. He didn’t see anything wrong with what he was doing so he doesn’t get what Jinhwan is so mad about. 

He takes a few hours sitting at a bench trying to calm down. 

*a few days after*

Hanbin has been ignoring his friends' calls and texts for days. He hasn’t been going to dinners and night outs with them also. One night, Junhoe came to visit him in his studio.

He peeks through Hanbin’s door and he says hi. Hanbin looks back and smiles at him. He spins around his chair to face Junhoe. “What are you doing here?” he asks.

“I brought you chicken. Thought you maybe hungry.” Junhoe says.

Hanbin checks his watch. “I didn’t notice it was this late I forgot to eat. Thank you.”

“You’re really that busy huh? You haven’t been answering my calls and messages.”

“Oh. That. Sorry. Preparing a new album.”  
“I understand. Here eat first.” He says as he hands out the box of chicken.

Hanbin takes it and he waits for Junhoe to leave. 

“Oh do you want me to leave now?” Junhoe asks.

“I can’t work with other people in my studio. I’m sorry.”

Junhoe gets disappointed. He nods and he goes out of the room.

*hanbin texts Junhoe*

Hanbin rings Junhoe’s doorbell and he welcomes him in. When he steps in, he doesn’t step any further. Junhoe closes the door and asks, “What’s wrong?”

Hanbin turns around to face Junhoe.  
“What are we doing?” he asks.

“What do you mean?” Junhoe seemed confused.

“I mean all this. The flirting. The being nice to me all the time. The sending me food. The sudden care and concern. I know you care but we both know it’s a different type of care now. What are we doing?” Hanbin’s asks. Jinhwan's words got to him. 

“I don’t know.” Junhoe answers.

“Do you like me?” Hanbin asks.

“What if I did?”

“You can’t.”

“Why not?”

Hanbin doesn’t answer. 

They both stay quiet for a while. Hanbin sits at Junhoe’s floor and leans back at the door behind him. Junhoe sits beside him. Hanbin starts to tear up. 

“It’s still him, huh?” Junhoe asks.

“I’m sorry.” Hanbin said as he wipes away his tears.

“Hey. Don’t be. I know. And just because it’ still him, doesn’t mean I’ll stop caring. I’m here and I’ll be here to listen to you, to watch you cry, to bring you food. I’m here. Even as friends. Okay? I wasn’t asking for anything in return and you shouldn’t feel like you need to give something back. I’m doing this willingly.” 

“Why are you so nice to me?” Hanbin cries harder.

“I’ve always been nice to you. You just never noticed.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop saying sorry.”

“I’m sorry.” They both laugh.

“You want a bottle of beer?” Junhoe asks.  
“Sure.”

They both get up and proceed to the kitchen. 

They talk about life and love and everything in between. 

Hanbin drives home after having a drink with Junhoe. He goes home to his new apartment. His luggages were still on his room floor. He hasn’t found the time to fix his stuff yet. Since he couldn’t sleep, he decides to fix them now. He takes out the clothes and hangs them one by one in his closet. Then he sees the small bag where the letters were. He takes them out and he took the one on top. 

August 13, 2017

He unfolds the paper and he starts reading.

Hanbinnie,

It’s three hours past 12 and I just got home. It’s been 5 hours since I last saw you but you haven’t left my mind even for a second. You were so good tonight. It was as if I watched you for the very first time. I’m so proud of you.

During your encore stage, you sang an unreleased song. You said it was dedicated to a “bunny” who no longer was in your life but you can’t seem to forget. They all laughed when you said “bunny.” You did too and then you started singing. I kinda wished you didn’t. 

“Living in the past memories is a helpless sense of loneliness. To be forgotten from those memories is more painstaking than any brutal moment.”

This was a part of the song. I couldn’t get it out of my mind. 

Hanbinnie, you haven’t been forgotten. Every moment we had, every memory we made, it still feels like it happened yesterday. I wish you didn’t have to live the memories of the past and I’m sorry that you are. I’m sorry that all I can do now is say sorry and I’m sorry I couldn’t even say it to your face. 

“I didn’t mean to date you just to cry together. I didn’t mean to create memories just to be left with pain. I didn’t just love you to break up with you.” 

I didn’t mean to date you to make you cry. I didn’t mean to create memories with you to leave you with pain. I didn’t just love you to leave you. 

I wish I could take all the pain and heartache from you. I wish you weren’t hurting as much as you are. I wish you’d forget about me and move on. I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better. I wish you’d be happy again.

My heart breaks every day for you. It breaks every day yours do.

I love you so much, Kim Hanbin. I wish love was enough.

Jiwon’

 

Hanbin is on the floor crying. He was sobbing so hard he had a hard time breathing. He takes his phone and he texts Bobby.

*insert texts*

Hanbin waits for Bobby at his door. He was crying so hard he couldn’t stop. When Bobby enters his house, he runs to him and wraps his arms around Bobby’s neck. Bobby takes him in and wraps his arms around Hanbin’s waist and he buries his face in Hanbin's neck. 

Bobby didn't know why he was crying but he was so worried he tried to calm Hanbin down so that he can ask him what was wrong. He keeps him in his arms until Hanbin wasn’t crying so hard anymore. 

“What were you doing outside my house?” Hanbin asks with arms still wrapped around Bobby.

“What were you doing that you’re crying this much?” Bobby asks back.

Hanbin pulls away and looks at Bobby in the eye. Bobby wipes away the tears in his face. 

“You first.” Hanbin says.

“I wanted to feel better.” Bobby says. 

Hanbin wasn’t sure what he meant.

He walks further in the apartment and sits at his couch. Bobby follows him and sits with a little space away from Hanbin but he was facing him.

“Why are you crying?” Bobby asks. 

He takes the paper on the table and he hands it to Bobby.

Bobby reads the first few words and smiles sadly.

“It’s the first one I read.” 

“You don’t have to read the others.”

“I kind of don’t want to anymore.” Hanbin says and Bobby laughs.

“Why did you need to feel better?” Hanbin asks. Bobby shrugs.

“You’re not gonna tell me?” he asks again.

“If my father’s scandal didn’t happen, do you think we’d still be together until now?” Bobby asks diverting Hanbin’s attention.

“I don’t see a reason why not.”

“Me too.” 

Hanbin looks at Bobby and Bobby looks at him with the saddest eyes.

“If I wasn’t in a relationship, would you take me back?” 

“Yes. After a lot of begging and making up, I think I would." he says jokingly. "But you are.” he adds this time seriously. 

“But I am.”

They stay quiet for a while but it wasn’t awkward. It was comfortable silence.

“I better go. It’s getting late.” Bobby says.  
Hanbin nods and walks him to the door. 

Before Bobby goes out, Hanbin tells him one more thing.

“I wasn’t over for me.” 

Bobby takes his hand to Hanbin’s face and wipes away the tears from his eyes. “You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now.” He brushes his thumb on Hanbin’s lips and he pulls him in. He hugs him and he kisses the side of his head. He pulls away, walks out of the door and doesn’t look back.

UPDATE 8 

“Hanbinnie,

Tonight I went to see you. I watched your eyes light as people sang along to your song. I watched your mouth spread the biggest smile; the smile I’ve always loved. Tonight was the happiest I’ve seen you since I left. And tonight I realized how much of your happiness is still my happiness.

The bitterness of life comes creeping in the moment you’re out of sight but one look at that beautiful face again, it fades. 

My love, tonight I need to say goodbye. I need to say goodbye to the things that hurt even if it’s also the one helping me get through hurting. Tonight I’m saying goodbye to you.

I’m not saying goodbye because I want to neither forget you nor get over you because that will never happen. I’m saying goodbye because it is I I’m forgetting. 

This time away from you my only goal was to see that sweet smile of yours again and while trying to achieve that I lost myself in the process. I’ve been too focused on your happiness that I forgot about mine. I’ve been too dependent on you that I’d rather live every day in the dark because I knew I was seeing you and the light you gave me was going to be enough until the next time I saw you. 

All this I thought I could live with the rest of my life. This may be conceited, but it struck to me that I needed to be happy too. And not just because you were. I thought I needed to learn how to be happy without you. 

I know I promised I would never let go. But today, I am breaking that promise. For almost two years I have longed for nothing but your touch but time has come that I accept the fact that it will never happen anymore.

You’re a dream, Kim Hanbin. You’ll always be my dream.

Jiwon.”

Hanbin wipes away his tears falling from his eyes. “Why the fuck do I keep torturing myself?” 

He gets up from his bedroom carpet and he takes a jacket from his closet. He walks out of his building and takes a long walk to Han River.

He strolls around the picnic area and sits at one of the benches. A person sits beside him startling him.

“Aish! Do you want to die?! You scared the shit out of me!” He screams.

Junhoe was dying of laughter. “Why are you here?”

Hanbin clams down and says “Just needed air. And some time to think. You?”

“Same. I was walking around and I saw you so I followed.”

They both sit in silence for a while before saying something again.

“How do people move on?” Hanbin asks clearly referring to Bobby.

“Do you want to?” Junhoe asks.

“I want to stop hurting. I want to stop crying. I want to be able to read his letters and not feel anything. Do you think that time will ever come?”

“If you want it to come.”

“You’re right. The reason I’m here because I’ve been allowing myself to be here. I’ve been telling myself that it’s okay and that I’m okay when I’m really not.”

“Took you long enough to admit that you aren’t. But at least you’re not in denial anymore. I’m proud of you.” Junhoe laughs and rubs the top of Hanbin’s head.

“Would you help me?”

“What? Move on?”

“Yeah.”

“How?” Junhoe looked so confused.

“Pretend to be my boyfriend.”

Junhoe bursts out laughing. “What are we? Kids?!”

“Oh it doesn’t work on adults?” Hanbin asks innocently. 

“Lying never works.” Junhoe says still laughing. “I think you have to stop watching romcoms.”

Hanbin pouts. “What do I do then? How am I gonna go to dinner with you guys and move on when he’s with his boyfriend all the time?”

“I thought you liked him.”

“I do. But it makes me want to be him sometimes.”

“You don’t have to be anyone to be liked and or loved. You’re perfect.” Junhoe says sincerely. 

Hanbin gives him a sad smile.

“Then what do you want me to do?”

“Don’t go when he’s around.”

“He’s going to think I’m bitter.”

“He can think whatever he wants but you’re doing this for you not for him.”

“You think I should talk to him about it?”

“You can.”

Hanbin releases a deep sigh.

“It’s all about self-love, Hanbinnie. Love yourself enough to know you can’t go around waiting for people and be accepting the minute they come to you. That’s how people take advantage of you. You are worthy enough to be loved without having to wait. Bobby’s not the only one capable of loving you. And I’m not saying this because.. you know. I’m saying this as a friend so don’t get me wrong.”

Hanbin laughs. “Thank you, Juneya. I needed that.”

“Anytime. Do you want to go get ramen?”

“How about beef and soju?”

“Sounds better.”

They take Junhoe’s car to a samgyupsal place and they have drinks and beef to cap off the night. 

*insert tweets*  
*new day*

Bobby wakes up in the middle of the night and notices Donghyuk wasn’t home yet.

*bobby texts Donghyuk*

Bobby gets up from bed and puts a shirt on. He drives to Donghyuk’s studio to pick him up only to see it was already closed. He walks back to his car and hears people going out of the back exit. He sees Donghyuk and another guy talking and laughing as they exit. He rushes back to his car while Donghyuk and the guy turn at the corner.

The guy walks Donghyuk home while Bobby drives back to the apartment. He got there minutes before Donghyuk. 

When Donghyuk enters their house, he’s startled with Bobby sitting on the couch in the dark. 

“You scared me! Why are you still up?” Donghyuk asks.

“Couldn’t sleep.” He says coldly.

“Well I’m tired so I’m gonna go ahead.” Donghyuk walks past Bobby but Bobby grabs his arm. He pulls Donghyuk closer and he hugs him from his waist. 

“Babe I’m tired I just want to sleep. Can I go do that?” Donghyuk asks half begging. Bobby releases him and Donghyuk proceeds to their room. Bobby gulps down the rest of the beer from his bottle before going back to the room to sleep.

*a few days after*

Bobby went to visit one of his clubs in Gangnam and met with a few friends while he was there. He goes home drunk while Donghyuk was waiting at home for him. 

He enters their door and struggles to take off his shoes. Donghyuk comes running from their room.

“Where have you been I’ve been trying to call you?!” he asks angrily.

“Hey baby. I was just.. there.” Bobby says pointing out of the door while laughing.

“Okay. Let’s get you up and to the room.” Donghyuk assists Bobby which was struggling to untie his shoe laces on the floor. 

“You’re so nice to me. Am I nice to you?” Bobby asks out of the blue.

“Yes. You’re nice to me.” He answers as the walk to the room.

Donghyuk drops Bobby to the bed and Bobby lays on it flat. He was taking so much of the space; Donghyuk decides to sit at the edge. And then Bobby starts crying. Donghyuk gets worried he asks Bobby again and again what was wrong until Bobby found the words to say.

“I know you’re seeing someone else.” He cries. “I know… I know… I’ve known for a while…” 

Donghyuk doesn’t say anything but he starts to cry too.

“I know why you left at Yunhyeong’s party. It was his birthday. I know why you’re always on your phone because you guys text all the time. I know when you go out of the room in the middle of the night, you answer his call. I know you’d rather stay in the studio than go home because he’s there.” He was slurring words but Donghyuk understood ever words he was saying. “I know… I know..” Bobby continues to say those words until he falls asleep. 

The next morning, Bobby wakes up to the smell of pancakes. He gets up excitedly but before he walks out of the door, he remembers their last conversation. He slaps his head with his palm and he’s unsure if he wanted to go out of the room. He thinks if he should pretend he doesn’t remember or just face it. He takes a moment before finally going downstairs.

“Hey. Good morning.” Donghyuk says. “I made you soup. And also bacon and pancakes.” He says as if nothing happened the night before.

Bobby walks up to him and gives him a kiss on the cheek. He sits at the one of the stools by the kitchen island and takes the plates stacked. He places one in front of him and one for Donghyuk. Donghyuk continues to flip the pancakes and Bobby stays silent.

When Donghyuk plates the last pancake, he sits down across Bobby. He places a stack of three pancakes in Bobby’s plate and pours syrup in it. 

“Are we gonna talk about it?” Bobby asks. He wanted to let it go but he wanted to hear from her.

Donghyuk’s heart was beating so hard. “What do you want to know?”

“Do you love him?” Bobby was scared to death of what Donghyuk’s answer would be he kinda regretted he let those words slip. 

But Donghyuk shakes his head. He looks at Bobby in the eye and says “I love you.”

“Then why?”

Donghyuk takes a deep breath and starts explaining.

“I got insecure. After finding out everything, I don’t know I just, it got to me. I started thinking that I’ll never be him or I’ll never be close to him. Bobby, you flew to Paris right after finding out he found out. You couldn’t even come to London with me to spend the holidays. What did you expect me to feel?” Donghyuk has started crying.

“I met him in London. His family also lived there and he also danced and he was looking for a job. So I told him I owned a studio. We started hanging out in London but when he tried to kiss me one night, I stopped it. That’s when I realized that I loved you and you loved me and that was all that mattered and I had to let my insecurities go. But then we started hanging out with your friends, Hanbin was always there and..” he was crying so hard.

“I don’t hate him, I don’t, he’s a great guy and it’s amazing how welcoming he is of me and you, but then I can’t help but notice that when he makes jokes, you laugh the hardest, and when we eat you make sure there’s no sundried tomatoes in it because he’s allergic, and when he’s not around you always ask for him, and when he’s with Junhoe you can’t stop staring. I know it could just be a habit or it doesn’t really mean anything but it gets to me. Those little things get to me.” He takes a breath and wipes his tears before talking again.

“And when Deukie showed up in my studio here in Korea, it felt good. He made an effort to be with me and he made me feel it was just me he wanted and I took advantage.” 

Bobby was crying now too. He was pissed but he also felt responsible. He stood up and paced the dining area back and forth. 

“So what now?” Bobby asks.

“I want you. I stopped it with him. I called him last night and told him it was over. I love you and I want to be with you. I’m sorry.” Donghyuk says as he held Bobby’s hand still crying.

Bobby pushes Donghyuk’s hand away from him and he climbs the stairs to the room. Donghyuk follows him crying hysterically. Bobby changes from his pyjamas and he walks out of the room. Donghyuk grabs a hold of his hand and begs for him not to leave.

“Let me go.” Bobby says calmly with tears falling from his eyes.

Donghyuk couldn’t say anything. He was just crying.

“I knew. I knew all this time but it hurts a thousand times more when I heard it from you.”

Bobby pulls Donghyuk’s grab away from his arm and he leaves. Donghyuk drops down the floor crying.

*new time*

Jinhwan was making rounds when he sees a familiar face sitting at one of the hospital benches.

“Ya Kimbap! What are you doing here?” He calls out from afar. He was happy to see him.

Bobby stands up and waits for Jinhwan to come to him.

“Have you been crying? Are you okay?” Jinhwan asks worriedly.

“I know you’re busy but I have nowhere else to go.” Bobby says.

“I’m about to be off in an hour. Wait for me?” 

“Okay. I’ll be here.”

“Wait in my office.”

Jinhwan takes Bobby to his office while he goes back to making rounds. Bobby’s phone was ringing nonstop because of Donghyuk. He turns it off and waits for Jinhwan to come back. He scans the office and he sees a bunch of photos framed. He takes the one without him in it and he wonders what their lives would be if he hadn’t come back.

Jinhwan enters the room a couple minutes later with food for both him and Bobby.

“Mac and cheese?” He hands out the little container to Bobby.

“Ironic that you serve unhealthy food.” Bobby scoffs.

“Every hospital does. And you don’t eat salad so you’re stuck with that.”

They both sit in the couch and start to eat.

“So what happened?”

Jinhwan says as he shoved the greens to his mouth.

“Donghyuk’s cheating on me. Well, cheated. He said he broke it off last night.” 

Jinhwan chokes. “Oh my goodness. I wasn’t expecting that. How did you know?!”

“He’s been acting weird when he got back from London. I tried to ignore until I saw his messages. I didn’t mean to though. And then I saw him with him. It’s been a while since I knew but I got drunk last night and I told her that I knew.”

“Wow. Wow! I wasn’t expecting that from him. Did you talk about it?”

“Yeah. This morning.”

“What did he say?”

“He said he got insecure over Hanbin. Because I was showing signs that I still cared. Shit like that.”

“Oh. Were you?”

“I don’t know, Jinani. Maybe I did but I didn’t do it on purpose. Do you notice me act differently around Hanbin?”

“No but maybe because I was used to you and him being all sweet. And also because I’m not Donghyuk.”

“Do you think it’s my fault?”

“I’m not saying it’s acceptable that he cheated because he got insecure. But you have to look at why too.”

“Why do I feel responsible and guilt?” Bobby says upset.

“Maybe because he’s right. You still care. It’s not wrong that you still care especially that you’re friends but you have a boyfriend. He doesn’t see you as friends. Hanbin will always be your ex in his eyes. I think you need to consider that.”

Bobby gets frustrated. He rubs his face with his hands. “What do I do?”

“Hanbin told me about your last conversation. Did you know about the cheating then?”

Bobby nods.

“But you didn’t kiss Hanbin.”

“I’m not a cheater.”

“Don’t you think that still being emotionally attached to Hanbin is cheating too? Yes, you didn’t kiss him but you were there. You came to him. Or even if Hanbin was the one to call you, you knew you had a boyfriend but you chose to go.”

Bobby starts crying.

“Jiwonie, I’m not judging you. I will never. I just want you to make a choice. Be fair to yourself for once. Stop sacrificing your happiness to please other people. Make a choice. If you choose Donghyuk, forgive him wholeheartedly and choose to move forward. Never bring it up again. If you choose Hanbin, end it with Donghyuk properly and stand by your decision. Hanbin’s through so much and he’s still here crying over you. He deserves the world but if you can’t give it to him, let him go.”

Bobby was torn. He loved them both and he never intended to hurt them both. He leaves Jinhwan’s office and he finds himself driving to Hanbin’s address. While driving, he receives a text.

*insert hanbin texting bobby*

Bobby takes the elevator up. Hanbin greets him at the door and he immediately hugs Hanbin. Hanbin is taken aback but he leaves him be. Bobby hugs him for a while before pulling away. 

“Are you okay? Why did you text me?” Bobby asks Hanbin.

“Yeah. I need to talk to you.”

“Me too.” Bobby says. “But you go first.” He smiles at him.

Hanbin hands him the letters. He tied them back together including the two he opened. Bobby’s expression changes.

“What’s this?” Bobby asks.

“Your letters.”

“Why are you giving them back?”

“Because I’ll never get over you if I have those with me and I want to get over you.” Hanbin say bluntly. 

Bobby’s heart breaks into pieces.

“I'm sorry. I'll go straight to the point. I’m tired. My heart has been breaking since you came back and it breaks a little more I’m with you. There are things I want to do to you and say to you but I can’t and it’s tiring that I can’t. I’m tired of waiting, Jiwonie. I’m tired of crying. I fall every time I read your letter and I’m tired of picking myself up. I’m tired of hurting. I’m tired of breaking. I’m tired. I’m tired.” Hanbin started bawling like a child when he was talking. 

Bobby pulls him in and hugs him tight. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He cries with him. “I’m sorry.” He says again. He kisses the side of his head and makes him rest in his shoulders again. 

Hanbin and Bobby were sitting on the floor across from each other. It’s been over 30 minutes of pure silence.

“How many more goodbye’s?” Bobby asks.

Hanbin laughs. “I think we’ve come to the last one.” 

“I’m going to miss you. As a friend.” Bobby says jokingly.

“Me too. As a friend.” They both laugh. “At least I asked permission.”

“I would’ve understood if you didn’t.”

“I know. I just wanted to see you one last time.” Hanbin says sincerely.

“This hurts a lot more than three years ago.”

“You have a boyfriend. Don’t say that.”

Bobby doesn’t respond to Hanbin’s comment.

“I need to go. But I kinda don’t want to.” Bobby says instead.

“You have to. I need you to.”

Bobby nods his head.

He gets up and he offers his hand to help Hanbin up. He hugs Hanbin one more time this time along with all the love he has for him. He hopes that when he pulls away, his feelings do too. 

“It was nice seeing you again, Kim Jiwon. Maybe in another life.” Hanbin says jokingly but he regrets saying it because it hurt.

“The pleasure is all mine, Kim Hanbin. I’ll always be cheering for you from afar. Always.”

Hanbin nods. They hug one more time and Bobby leaves Hanbin’s pad.

*insert texts*

Donghyuk was still up in the living room waiting for Bobby to come home. When Bobby steps inside, he stands up from the couch and he gives Bobby a sad smile. He walks up to Bobby and he hugs him. He starts crying again and he says he’s sorry again. Bobby brings his arms up and he hugs Donghyuk back.

“I’m sorry too.”

UPDATE 9

 

“I didn’t know you liked queen.”

Hanbin looks behind him and sees a familiar face. His face lights up and his lips spread the biggest smile. He looks at the record he was holding and looks back at the person behind him.

“It’s not for me. It’s for Junhoe. Birthday gift.” He says almost couldn't put his words together. 

“Hey.” Bobby says with the biggest smile. He approaches to hug Hanbin and Hanbin gives him a hug back.

“Hey.” Hanbin says. “This is totally unexpected! How are you?”

Bobby nods. “I’m good. I’m good. I was walking by and I thought I saw a familiar face. How about you? How are you? It’s been what? Two years?”

“Yeah? More than? I don’t know? I’m good. I just got back last week.”

“Right. You’re pretty big out there.”

“Nah. Just doing my thing.” Hanbin shrugs and laughs.

The two stare at each other for a few seconds and laugh at the same time. They were amused at the situation.

“I can’t believe this.” Bobby says laughing. 

“Crazy.” Hanbin agrees. “I was actually going to meet up with the boys. Junhoe’s birthday dinner. Do you want to come?”

“Yeah Yunhyeong called me earlier about it. But I’m on my way to Donghyuk’s studio. I promised I’d watch his students showcase.”

“Right, right. Of course.” Hanbin walks to the registrar to pay for the record. 

“We should get drinks sometimes? Maybe with the boys? Are you going to be in town long?” Junhoe reaches out.

“Sure I’d love to. Bring Donghyuk, too. Yeah I’m back for good. It was getting lonely up there and Hanbyulie’s growing up without me. I realized it was time to go home.”

“She is growing up isn’t she? Time flies so fast.”

“Jiun hyung and his wife came to see my show once. I didn’t know they moved to Virginia ‘til then.

“Yeah, yeah sister-in-law landed a pretty good job there so..”

“I heard. We had dinner and I met Raonie. He was adobrable.”

“He is. Getting chubbier and chubbier.” Bobby says and they both chuckle.

After Hanbin pays for his record, they both walk out of the store.

“Jaeho hyung’s waiting for me at the corner. You sure you don’t want to come?”

“I wish I could. Next time.”

“I gotta go. They’re gonna kill me you know how much they hate waiting.”

“Yeah. Go! I’ll see you around.”

“Of course.”

They both hug one more time and Hanbin starts walking away.

“Hanbinnie!” Jiwon calls him and Hanbin looks back. “It was nice seeing you.” he says.

“You too.” Hanbin smiles and runs to his car.

*at the restaurant*

“You’re late!” Yunhyeong calls out.

“I know, I know! Sorry!” Hanbin rushes to take off his coat. He takes the cake on the table and Yunhyeong lights the candle. 

They both walk in the private room where Junhoe, Jinhwan and Chanwoo were and they start singing for Junhoe. Junhoe blows the candle and Chanwoo pops the bottle of champagne. 

“Was that necessary?” Junhoe asks.

“It’s a celebration! You’re old, man!" Chanwoo says. They all cheer and settle down for dinner.

“Yah! What took you so long?” Jinhwan asks Hanbin who was seated beside Junhoe across them.

“Believe it or not, I bumped into Bobby.”

“Did you guys talk?” Jinhwan asks. The guys got curious also.

“Yeah of course we did. I invited him to come but Donghyuk has a showcase and he said he promised he’d go.”

“Right. He told me about that.” Jinhwan remembers. 

“Okay. Enough of Bobby talk. Let’s focus on the birthday boy! Here’s my gift Juneya!” Hanbin hands out the plastic bag containing the record.

Junhoe takes it out and smiles. “You know me too well.” He says.

“Of course I do.” Hanbin says confidently. “I bought you the limited edition one it hasn’t been delivered yet. I’ll bring it to you when I get it.”

Junhoe mouths the words ‘thank you’ to Hanbin and Hanbin gives him the most precious smile.

The others take out their gifts and Junhoe opens them one by one like a kid. He thanks them all and they all enjoy the 12-course meal Yunhyeong prepared for them.

*post ig post*

“You seem to be in a good mood. Is it because you saw Bobby today?” Junhoe asks Hanbin as he drives him home.

“Are you jealous?” Hanbin teases.

Junhoe scoffs. “Jealous his ass.”

“He has a pretty ass though.”

Junhoe glares at Hanbin and Hanbin laughs out loud.

“What did you wish for today?” Hanbin asks.

“I’m not telling. But I can see it coming true already.”

“Tell meeeeeeee.” Hanbin begs. 

“No you’re gonna jinx it.”

“No jam.”

Junhoe laughs. “You’re a kid you know.”

“Young and wild and free forever.” Hanbin does the YWF sign as he spoke.

Junhoe laughs at his silliness. He parks outside Hanbin’s parents’ house and gets off the car with Hanbin. 

“Thank you for today.” Junhoe says and hugs him.

Hanbin hugs him back. “Anything for my favourite person. Well, one of my favorites.”

Junhoe chuckles and rubs the top of Hanbin’s head and says, “Go in.”

“Wanna come in for a bottle of beer?”

“No. I’m going home at my parents’ house I don’t want to keep them waiting.”

“Okay. Go now.” Junhoe nods and gets back to the car. He waves goodbye and Hanbin watched him as he drove away.

Hanbin walks in the house and proceed to his room. He takes a hot shower and lays down his bed. He thinks about the events that happened within the day and he laughs at his crazy encounter with Bobby. 

Two years ago, he decided to take his company’s offer to focus on promoting in the States. Producers were looking forward to working with him and have been asking if he wanted to for a long time. He never really considered because he never imagined himself away from home. He knew if he did move, he had to be there long. It was a commitment that required all his time. But he realized how toxic it was getting for him emotionally in Korea. Only then he decided to take the offer. He needed change. A breath of fresh air. And he wasn’t getting any of that anymore. He worked on an album for months before his CEO approved everything. He was busy but this time he also kept time for himself. He wasn’t running away but taking his time to mourn. He poured his heart and all the hurt that came with it on his album.

It was very effective because it charted on Billboard. He went on an American tour for a few months before releasing another album and going on another tour. 

Getting over Bobby was the hardest thing he ever did and he knew if he stayed, he never really would’ve done it. People around him would always be talking about him or asking about him. He knew he’d bump into him every now and then and that they’d always be invited to the same events so he decided to give everything up for himself. It was time he stopped torturing himself with the things that hurt when there was a way to make them stop. He wanted to be told that he looked happy instead of forcing it into to others. He wanted to stop lying to himself and so he faced it. He left and left everything that reminded him of Bobby behind. 

*a few days after*

After Jiun and his family decided to move to the States, Bobby’s father had been talking to Bobby about his company and how he wanted a family member to take over. Bobby spent a long time thinking about it until he agreed. The reason he didn’t want to take the offer at first was that he was afraid he couldn’t achieve what his father has achieved. He didn’t think he could handle the pressure. But his father wasn’t kind and was very considerate of things so he watched Bobby work and corrected his mistakes professionally. It would take 3 to 7 more years before his father decides to give it over to Bobby but he wanted Bobby know everything there was to know so he asked him to sell his clubs and focus on the company which Bobby did wholeheartedly. 

*Sunday*

Bobby’s parents went to Virginia to visit Jiun and Raon for a few weeks. Bobby had a lot of work to do so he decided to stay and go another time.

He went to grocery shop for ramen when he bumps into Hanbin’s mom. Hanbin’s mom gives him a hug as soon as she sees him and he gives her a hug back.

“What are you doing here I thought you left for the States?” Hanbin’s mom asks.

“It’s just mom and dad. There’s much work to do so I decided to stay.”

Hanbin’s mom looks at the pack of ramen Bobby was holding and takes it away from him.

“You’re eating at home and I’m not taking no for an answer.”

Bobby grins and nods. “What are we having tonight?” he asks excitedly.

“Hanbin has been wanting to eat ox bone soup and I never had the time so that’s what I’m making. Do you want anything else?”

“Nope. You know how much I love your cooking so I’m good with whatever you make.” Bobby says smiling while he helped her pick out vegetables.

“Have you seen each other? Hanbinnie and you?” 

“Yeah we bumped into each other the other day. I forgot to get his number so I haven’t been able to call.”

“That’s good. He has been doing nothing but play games ever since he came back. Tiring to watch really.”

Bobby laughs. “He derserves it. He’s been working a lot.”

“You’re right. I worry a lot about him you know? Especially when he was away. He may look like a grown up on the outside but he’s still a baby to me. You all are still babies in our eyes.” Hanbin’s mom brings her hand up to Bobby’s face.

Bobby was touched at what she said. “Eommoni, I never had a chance to say this before but I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt him. I didn’t mean to make him leave.”

“Kwaenchana. Hanbinnie told me everything. What’s in the past is in the past. And I think him leaving was the best decision. It was good for him and for you too. I should be the one to be sorry. I put you kids through all that. How irresponsible of a mom right?”

“I don’t think it was irresponsible. You were just being a mom.”

Hanbin’s mom smiles. He remembers Hanbin telling her the same thing.

Habin’s mom and Bobby drive off to the house on separate cars since his mom also just drove there. Hanbyul runs up to Bobby as soon as she sees him and she drags him to Hanbin’s room immediately. Hanbin was on the floor sleeping with his mouth open and Hanbyul was making fun and taking pictures of him. Bobby laughs at his sight and he takes a photo of Hanbin as well. They both go out and leave Hanbin to sleep some more. 

Bobby and Hanbyul volunteered to help their mom make dinner but they kept bickering about how thinly the vegetables should be sliced so their mom kicked them both out of the kitchen. 

“What do we do now?” Bobby asks Hanbyul. They were both seated at the couch.

“Wanna play Tekken 7 oppa? I’m really good.”

“Ha! We’ll see about that.” Bobby warns Hanbyul. 

They set up the console and they sit on the couch. Hanbyul wasn’t kidding when she said she was good. She beat Bobby up at some rounds. They were so into the game they both were becoming competitive. There was screaming and shouting and laughing at whoever lost. 

Hanbin woke up to the sound of the TV and went out of his room. He sits at the couch behind Hanbyul and Bobby but the two doesn’t notice. 

After Hanbul beats Bobby again, Bobby throws the controllers away from him. 

“Aish I don’t wanna play anymore.” Bobby says. “Where did you learn to play like that huh?”

“Just skills.” Hanbyul bluffs. She played the game after school, after doing homework, and before going to bed.

“You’re a lot better than your brother you know.”

“I know. He sucks no matter how hard he tries.” Hanbyul says and they both laugh.

“Ehem.” Hanbin says behind them. They both look behind and see Hanbin glaring at the both of them. 

Hanbyul gets up immediately and runs to the kitchen. “I’ll set up the plates!” she shouts. Bobby laughs.

“Hey.” Bobby says smilingly.

“Hey.” Hanbin smiles back. “What are you doing here?”

“Your mom insisted I had dinner with you.”

Hanbin nods. Bobby gets up and sits at the couch too.

“Did you sleep well?” 

“You went into my room?”

“No. No.” Bobby denies it and he tries his best to hold his laughter.

Hanbin glares. 

“Hanbyul brought me there I didn’t know you were asleep.”

Before Hanbin was able to react, his father arrives from work. Bobby stands up to greet him and Hanbin follows.

“You’re here? I thought you were in the States?” Hanbin’s dad asks.

“It’s just mom and dad.” Bobby responds.

“I understand. Come, come let’s have dinner.”

They guys sit at the table while Hanbyul and her mom served the dishes one by one. They say grace and they eat all together.

“Are you guys back together?” Hanbin’s dad asks out of the blue. Everyone in the table freezes and Bobby chokes on the water he was drinking.

“Appa!” Hanbin was embarrassed.

“I was just asking.” His father shrugs.

“It’s okay.” Bobby says. Hanbyul and her mom were laughing silently.

“So how’s work? Everything working out for you?” Hanbin’s dad tries to divert the topic.

Bobby answers the question and fills Hanbin up to what he was working on. He explains how he got there and how he gave up his business. Everything was working well for him. He’s caught up to everything he needs to know and he was actually enjoying at what he was doing. He was always made for the corporate and business stuff.

After dinner, they decide to have tea in the garden. Hanbin’s parents’ house had a big backyard with a pool and a very simple garden. His mom loved flowers. There was a table by the pool where they were having tea. Hanbin’s parents and Bobby continued to talk about business and the adult stuff. Bobby always came up to Hanbin’s dad for advice and he was always glad to help Bobby out. Hanbin didn’t have a clue as to what they were talking about so he volunteered to tuck Hanbyul to bed instead of his mom. He comes back after Hanbyul slept and his parents excused themselves for it was also time to rest. Bobby and Hanbin greets them good night and they stay to talk for a little while more.

“I didn’t understand a thing you guys were talking about.” Hanbin says.

“I figured.” Bobby chuckles. “I come to your dad often you know? He gives me the best advice, work-wise.” 

“I’m sorry about earlier. His question. I don’t know what’s gotten into him he knows you have a boyfriend.”

“But I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“Huh?”

“You didn’t know?”

Hanbin shakes his head. “But you said you were going to Donghyuk’s when we saw each other?” Did I really see you or was I daydreaming?”

“You daydream about me a lot huh?” Bobby teases. 

“You wish. Honestly though Donghyukie?”

“We broke up two years ago. The guys knew, your parents knew, even Hanbyulie knew. Nobody told you?”

“Obviously. Can I ask why?”

“I was still in love with you.”

Hanbin chokes on the tea he was drinking. Bobby laughs at taps his back. “You okay?”

“You’re very blunt you know?"

“You asked.”

Hanbin sighs. “I’m confused. When did this happen?”

“After I left your house the last time we saw each other.”

Hanbin breathes loudly. 

“We can talk about this another time.”

“No it’s fine. I’m fine. It’s just that.. why didn’t you come back to tell me? You knew I was still in love with you too.”

“Oh, I wanted too. So bad. There were days where I regretted I didn’t. But you were right, you needed to heal. And I needed to heal too. We were both broken in so many ways and as much as I wanted to be the one to fix you I knew it wasn’t possible. So I let you go. And I think it was the best decision I made.”

Hanbin couldn’t help but agree. “I think we would’ve ended up hating each other if we forced to get back together after everything we went through. There was so much hate and jealousy, well in my part, and I really didn’t realize until I chose to face them. I was in denial for so long.”

“I’m really sorry about everything. I really am.”

“We have to stop being sorry to each other, Jiwonie. It’s done and we got through it. We made it out alive and look, we’re even still friends and I think it’s beautiful.”

“We were friends first before we became a thing. Maybe that’s why it’s easy for us now.”

“You think we weren’t just meant to be?"

“Maybe. But I’m happy to be here.” Hanbin says honestly. 

“Me too..” Bobby raises his teacup. “To new beginnings? As friends?” 

“To new beginnings. As friends.” Hanbin responds happily and they toast.

*new day*

Hanbin had a meeting with a realtor at a coffee shop. He was getting a new house and since he was on a break, he thought it be the best time so that he can focus on the interior since he wasn’t busy. 

He came in earlier that he should’ve so they decide to order breakfast while waiting. He was with his manager Jaeho. He was the one to approve the location of the house. 

Donghyuk comes in the coffee shop and the first thing he sees is Hanbin. 

“Hanbin ah!” he calls out. 

Hanbin who was busy with his phone looks up to see who it was and smiles as soon as he sees Donghyuk. “Hey! How are you?” he greets him.

“I’m good! It’s so nice to see you! Bobby hasn’t shut up about you ever since you bumped into each other.” he says.

Hanbin doesn’t know how to react so he just smiles. 

A guys walks in a few minutes later and walks towards Donghyuk. “Oh, Hanbinnie, this is my boyfriend, Deukie. Deukie, Hanbinnie. He’s the one Bobby hasn’t shut up about.”

Hanbin, embarrassed, reached out to shake Deukie’s hand. They spend a few minutes of small talk and Donghyuk says goodbye to leave for work.

Hanbin sits back down on his table with Jaeho and Jaeho had this smile on his face Hanbin couldn’t figure out.

“Hyung you look creepy what are you smiling about?”

“You’re gonna lose.”

“Lose what?”

“Our bet.”

“What bet?! Hanbin had no idea what he was talking about.

Jaeho pulls out his phone and plays a recording he made with him and Hanbin placing a bet from years ago.

“You’re gonna get back together with him.”

“No I’m not.”

“Yes you are. Wanna bet?”

“Sure! What do we bet on?”

“Hmmmm. The newest cellphone model the time you get back together.”

“We’re not getting back together!”

“Then say deal.”

“DEAL.” 

Hanbin was laughing hysterically. “When was that?!” he couldn’t remember.

Jaeho checks his phone and checks the date of the recording.  
“2017” he says.

“The recording is four years old.”

“Yeah. So? I thought I was gonna win two years ago.”

“Well you didn’t and you’re not gonna win again this time cause it’s not happening. Maybe in another life.”

Jaeho doesn’t say anything else and just laughs. He practically raised Hanbin so he knows when he’s denying stuff. 

The realtor arrives and they proceed to the meeting. They go around areas and Hanbin checks out the place one by one until he decides which one to get. He spends the day working on paper works he needed for his new place.

 

-continuation-

Bobby and Donghyuk are seated at both edges of the couch. Donghyuk was wiping away tears and Bobby was staring blankly at the floor deep in his thoughts.

“I’m sorry.” Bobby says.

“You have nothing to be sorry about.” Donghyuk repsonds.

“I have everything to be sorry about.” He looks at Donghyuk and he moves closer to him. He takes his hand and he holds them up to his mouth. He kisses them and he says sorry again. “You deserve someone who’ll love you with his whole heart. I’m sorry I couldn’t. I made you feel insecure and you felt like you weren’t enough. That was all on me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I was looking at someone else when I was supposed to only be looking at you. I’m sorry about the sundried tomatoes.” They both laugh in the middle of tears. “I love you, Kim Donghyuk. I meant it the first time I said it and I still mean it now. I want to stop being unfair to you but how do I do that when I know I love him still too.” Bobby was crying so hard when he was speaking.

Donghyuk finds the strengh to speak. "Thank you. Thank you for respecting me and our relationship enough. Thank you for committing to your words. I'm sorry I cheated when I could've just told you. I'm sorry I was too weak to face the problem I was going through. I tried to runaway from it instead of facing it but I made the wrong choices while doing it. I'm sorry. I love you, Bobby. Thank you." 

Bobby hugs Donghyuk until they both calm down. 

 

\-----

 

The two break up but remained as friends. Donghyuk moved out of their house and Bobby sold the house and moves back in with his parents. 

After a few months, Donghyuk decided to give it a try again with Deukie and they actually found each other as a perfect match for one another. He loved Bobby but he was grateful he didn't lo

UPDATE 10

*insert texts to Jinhwan*

Hanbin slept the whole day so he wakes up late at night. He decides to go to the studio so he walks going there. When he arrives, one of his co-producers was there working. “You came?” Reasung asks. “Yeah. I just woke up and I wanted to be productive.” Hanbin responds. He takes a seat at the computer chair beside Raesung’s and steatches his arm. “Oh, those came for you earlier.” Reasung points at the flowers behind them. Hanbin looks back and a huge smile spreads his face. He stands up and sits at the couch where Raesung placed the flowers. He takes out the card and he reads it silently. 

”Keep that smile on. 😊 -BB”

Hanbin reads the note over and over again with the biggest smile on his face. Raesung was asking him a question but he was too occupied to notice. Raesung turns his chair around and looks at Hanbin smiling like he just won the lottery. “You look like an idiot.” He says. Hanbin gets startled and looks up to Raesung. 

Raesung was giving him a judgemental look so he stops himself from smiling. “What?!” Hanbin says. “Nothing. You’re smiling like an idiot. Who’s it from?” “Why do you wanna know?” “Why aren’t you telling me?” “Bobby! Bobby! It was from Bobby! Are you happy now?” Hanbin says as he gets up from the couch and sits back in front of his computer. Raesung was laughing at him. “I was just asking.” “Shut up. Get back to work.” “I’m done for the day. I’m leaving.” Raesung stands up and gets his coat. He taps Hanbin’s back and leaves the studio. 

Hanbin takes his phone out and he texts Bobby to thank him.

*insert texts*

*days after*

Bobby’s mom had the guys over for dinner. Junhoe couldn’t come because he was on a business trip to Shanghai and he wasn’t going to be back until later that night so he asked Hanbin to buy her flowers. Bobby’s mom calls Junhoe to thank him and Junhoe sent his regards. She always loved having the boys around and it made her really happy. 

After dinner, the boys went out to the backyard to drink while Hanbin stayed in to talk to Bobby’s mom.

“Are you seeing anyone, Kimbap?” Yunhyeong asks.

Bobby shakes his head.

“Great. There’s someone I like you to meet.”

“Nah. Not really looking for anyone right now.”

“He’s really great! Handsome, rich, …”

“Yeah but he’s a total douchebag. The type you hate most.” Chanwoo cuts Yunhyeong off.

“Hey! He’s not that bad!” Yunhyeong says.

“Oh he is. Capital B A D. BAD.” Jinhwan adds.

“This is why you guys are single no one is ever good enough for you.” Yunhyeong exclaims.

“Who says we were looking for relationships?” Jinhwan says in defense.

“Hanbinnie’s single.” Chanwoo tells Bobby.

Bobby laughs. “We’re just friends.”

“That’s what you guys said last time. If Chanwoo hadn’t walked in on you guys making out we never would’ve known.” Yunhyeong says laughing.

“Ewwww it’s still fresh on my mind.” Chanwoo says grossed out.

“I remember Chanwoo was about to cry when he walked out of the room after that incident.” Jinhwan says laughing.

Bobby was turning red from embarrassment.

“Good times.” Yunhyeong says and they all sigh. 

At the kitchen, Bobby’s mom was wiping the plates she had just washed and Hanbin was helping her put them back on the cupboards.

“Your appa may not show it but he’s really happy to have you’re here, Hanbin ah. He’s been excited about it for days.” Bobby’s mom was talking about Bobby’s appa.

“I promise to visit often now. Two years was quite long. I’m sorry for being away that long.” Hanbin says apologetically. 

“Stop being sorry. What’s important is we have you here now happy and healthy. That’s what matters okay?”

Hanbin smiles and nods. He never really realized how much he missed these people until this time.

“Bobby said he had dinner at your place the other day?”

“Yeah, he did! He bumped into my mom in the supermarket so she dragged him down to the house. It was nice. We got to catch up. He talked about working in his dad’s company. I’m so glad he finally had the courage to do it. He’s been wanting to do it, he was just scared I guess. He looks up to his dad the most and he’s scared of disappointing him.”

“I honestly gave up on hoping that he’d agree to work for his father. I was thrilled when I found out.”

“He’s doing a great job. My dad talks about him often. He knows he’ll do great.”

Well whatever he does, I’ll always be proud of him. I don’t know what I did to deserve such a good son.”

Hanbin smiles. He can see the sincerity in Bobby’s mom face and how proud she was of Bobby. It made him very happy too.

“What are you guys talking about?” Bobby asks as he walks in the kitchen. 

“Nothing.” Hanbin says and winks at his mom.

“I’m pretty sure I heard my name.”

Bobby’s mom taps his butt and says, “We were just talking how proud we were of you.”

“Cheesy things.” Hanbin adds.

Bobby rubs the top if Hanbin’s head messing up his hair. Hanbin brushes off his hand and Bobby laughs. He knew Hanbin hated it when people messed with his hair. 

“Time to go out Hanbinnie. The boys have been waiting for you.” Bobby tells Hanbin.

Hanbin gets up from the island stool and gives Bobby’s mom a hug. “Thank you for dinner. I’ll treat you to lunch next time. I’ll call you, I promise. Good night, eomoni.” 

Bobby’s mom hugs Hanbin back and rubs the back of his head. “It’s good to have you back, my son. And I’ll be expecting your call.” She pulls away and lets Hanbin get to his friends.

“What did you talk about?” Bobby asks.

“Go. Get out of here.” His mom says. He pouts and he heads out after giving his mom a peck on the cheek.

Junhoe has this habit of checking up on Hanbin every chance he gets. He’s been doing it for quite a while now and Hanbin has gotten used to it. 

*insert Junhoe text just landed*

EXCERPT FROM TWO YEARS AGO

Hanbin hasn’t come out of his room for two days. He hasn’t turned on his lights, he hasn’t eaten, and he hasn’t even drunk water. He left a text to Jaeho to let them know he was alive and that he just wanted to be alone for a bit. Hanbin was stressed, tied, broken and depressed. Jaeho has been insanely worried because he hasn’t seen him that down before. Hanbin’s parents tried reaching out to him but he didn’t answer. He thought of calling Bobby but he knew he was just going to make it worse so he called Junhoe. Junhoe got mad he wasn’t informed immediately. He flew to the US as soon as he found out and only then, Hanbin opened his room door. 

Junhoe doesn’t say anything and he doesn’t ask. He knew it wasn’t what Hanbin needed. He stayed and kept quiet until Hanbin was the one to say something.

“I’m hungry.” Hanbin says. He was in his bed lying in the dark with the lights still off. Junhoe was at the couch on his phone updating Hanbin’s mom.

“Anything in particular you want to eat?”

“Chipotle.”

“Order in or we go out?”

“I really don’t want to go out.”

“Okay I’ll go ask Jaeho hyung to order.”

“Order for everyone please. I’ll pay. I feel bad for worrying them.”

Junhoe nods and steps out of the room. He talks to Jaeho and Jaeho was very eager to get the food himself. Hanbin was like a baby brother to him and he was so upset he couldn’t do anything about what he was feeling so it felt like it was the least he could do. Junhoe walks back in the room and sits back at the couch.

“Jaeho’s really worried.”

“I know. I’ll apologize.”

Junhoe nods. Hanbin gets up and turns on the lights. He walks in the bathroom and takes a bath. Junhoe takes the chance to call his mom and update her with what was happening. 

Jaeho knocks on the door and hands out the plastic full of food to Junhoe. Junhoe takes them out one by one and arranges them on the table. Hanbin walks out on time and sits at the table in front of Junhoe.

“Wine? Beer?” Junhoe asks.

“Beer.” 

Junhoe gets up and takes two bottles from the fridge. He opens them both and hands one to Hanbin. They eat and drink in silence for a while.

“Feeling better?”

Hanbin nods. “I was just stressed and tired.”

“It’s okay. It happens.”

“Thank you for coming.”

“I had no choice.” Junhoe says jokingly. Hanbin chuckles.

“Really though, thank you.” he says sincerely.

“Anytime.” Junhoe smiles.

They both continue to drink and talk. 

Hanbin has gotten into a better mood. They both get a little tipsy so when Junhoe gets up to get more beer and trips on the carpet and falls. This startles Hanbin so he gets up to check on Junhoe. When he saw Junhoe on the floor he starts laughing until his tummy hurts. 

“Babo!” he says and continues to laugh. Junhoe, still on the floor lying, raises his hand up and asks for help getting up. Hanbin takes it and pulls him up. Junhoe stands up with his face a few inches away from Hanbin. They both stop laughing and stare at each other’s eyes. Junhoe leans in and kisses Hanbin on the lips and Hanbin, without thinking, kisses him back. Junhoe takes his hand up slowly to Hanbin’s neck and only then Hanbin realizes what he was doing. He stops the kiss but their foreheads were still touching. 

“I can’t.” Hanbin whispers. “Why not?” Junhoe asks. 

“It’s not fair.” Hanbin responds.

“Will that ever change?” 

Hanbin couldn’t answer. Junhoe walks away from him and he closes his eyes. He knew he just hurt the person who cared so much for him.

Junhoe wasn’t mad but he knew it was the time to talk about what he felt. He turns around and looks at Hanbin. Hanbin was looking at him with the saddest eyes feeling so guilty.

“Will I ever have a chance with you?” 

Junhoe asks a few feet apart from Hanbin.

“Junhoe...”

“Yes or no, Hanbinnie.”

Hanbin doesn’t answer. Tears start to fall from his eyes. 

Junhoe’s eyes start to tear up as well. He was shaking. He looks up the ceiling to stop the tears from falling and he wipes them before looking back at Hanbin. “Can I at least know why?” he says in between tears.

“You’re one of the most important people in my life. I wouldn’t be able to take it if I lost you too.” Hanbin says while he sobbed.

“Who says you’re going to lose me?”

“I lost the one person I’ve ever loved.”

“Maybe it’ll be different.”

“What if it’s not? What if we end up hurting each other? What if we end up hating each other? Juneya you’re all I have. I can’t...”

Junhoe walks towards Hanbin and hugs him. He kisses his forehead and he keeps him in his arms. “I’m here. I won’t go anywhere. I’m sorry.”

Hanbin wraps his arms around Junhoe’s body. “I’m sorry, too. I’m sorry.”

They both cry together in each other’s arms. 

Junhoe leaves after Hanbin falls asleep. 

He calls in the front desk for a bottle of wine to be sent to his room. He takes the bottle from the hotel attendant and he brings it in after he tips him. He takes a wine glass and he sits at his hotel room couch. 

He wanted to feel bad. He wanted to think Hanbin was being too selfish. He did everything for him. He was always the first one to call if something happened. He was by his side when Bobby left and he’s still there now. He made it a goal to make sure Hanbin was happy every day and if he wasn’t, he always made sure there was something he could do to make his day. He wanted to hate Hanbin but he knows all this he did without Hanbin asking him to. He did it by himself. He did it without questions. He did it willingly.

And while thinking about it, he realized Hanbin was there for him when he needed someone to be there for him too. Hanbin made sure to call no matter how busy work got when he knew everything back home was getting rough for Junhoe. And because he was human, like everyone, he thought that maybe, Hanbin felt the same way he did. 

That night, Junhoe cried like he never cried before. But most of his tears were because he understood where Hanbin was coming from. Who was Hanbin going to run to if they were the one who fought? Who was gonna fly to where Hanbin was when he wouldn’t get out of his room? Who was gonna make sure Hanbin had something to smile about everyday? And the other way around. Who was he gonna call if they were the one who fought? He thought about it long and he shed a lot of tears. But he understood. It was hard, but he did. 

*PRESENT TIME*

One of the artists from Hanbin’s company was having an album release party at Club Gabbia in Hongdae. Hanbin invited the boys to come after work and the boys were happy to go. 

They all had a table at the private area up the second floor. Junhoe and Hanbin were by the balcony cheering for Hanbin’s friend who was performing by the DJ’s booth downstairs. Junhoe had his arm around Hanbin’s neck from behind. 

“Yo chill. It looks like you’re about to break Junhoe in pieces.” Chanwoo tells Bobby who was straing down at Hanbin and Junhoe.

“What?”

Chanwoo points at Junhoe and Hanbin.  
“Was I that obvious?”

Chanwoo nods.

“Why do I feel this way?” Bobby whines.

“Cause you’re still in love with Hanbinnie. Too bad he’s over you.” Chanwoo says and walks out.

Bobby drops down the couch and leans back. He takes a gulp from his bottle and goes back to looking at Hanbin and Junhoe. “Is it really too late? He whispers to himself and sighs.

Bobby watched Junhoe release his arm from Hanbin and take out his phone from his pocket. Junhoe shows a text to Hanbin and whispers to Hanbin’s ear. He hated what he was feeling because of what he was seeing so he gets up and joins the other guys who were by the other side of the balcony nodding their heads to the beat of the music. 

Junhoe and Hanbin walk towards them and Junhoe starts saying goodbye to everyone who was there. “Chanwoo, Hanbin didn’t bring a car take him home. Stop drinking.” Chanwoo nods as he sips from his bottle of beer. “Aish.” Junhoe says. Hanbin laughs. “It’s okay I can rent an Uber or something. I’ll figure it out. Go.” Junhoe nods and bids farewell. 

Everyone was too drunk to drive except for Bobby. He calls their drivers and waits for them to fetch Jinhwan, Yunhyeong and Chanwoo. 

Hanbin stayed inside because some of his friends were still there and insisted he stayed a little longer. Bobby walks back in and looks for Hanbin. 

Hanbin sees Bobby scanning the place obviously looking for someone. He leaves his friends and walks towards Bobby. 

“Who are you looking for?” 

“There you are.”

Hanbin smiles. “Here I am.”

Bobby chuckles. “Ready to go home? I’ll drive you.” 

Hanbin looks behind him and sees his friends all wasted. He looks back at Bobby and says “Yeah. I’m tired.”

Bobby nods and leads the way out.

While on the way to Hanbin’s house, the radio plays Hanbin’s ‘Don’t Forget’

“Ugh, this is such an old song why are they still playing this.” Hanbin complains.

“It’s a really good song, though.” Bobby says.

“You think? I wrote it for you. Hmmm, after Paris I think.”

“I want to be flattered but they’re all sad songs so I really don’t know how to feel.” Bobby says.

Hanbin laughs. “Sad songs are my forte, though. Even when we were still together.”

Bobby laughs. “Right. What’s your favourite line from this song?” 

Hanbin thinks. “I like the line “I hope that you’re happy because I was happy because of you” the most. After finding out about Donghyuk, I knew it was the end for me. This was the line I thought of first.”

“I regret asking.” Bobby says. 

Hanbin laughs again. “Stop. It’s been years. This song is just a memory now. Not even a painful one anymore. Just a memory.” Hanbin assures Bobby everything was okay. 

Bobby wanted to agree but it still kinda hurt for him. He still felt sorry and he knows he’s always going to be sorry. He doesn’t say anything more but nods. 

“You never told me Donghyuk cheated on you.” Hanbin says diverting the topic because he knew it was making Bobby uncomfortable. 

“How’d you know?”

“Jinani.”

“Yeah. But it’s all good. Fun fact: he’s still with the guy now. And he looks so much happier than when he was with me.” Bobby says and laughs.

“Yeah I met him.” Hanbin says. “Pretty cool. and Donghyuk really did look happy.”

Bobby nods. “He is.”

“Are you? Happy?”

“Right now? Yes.”

“What makes you happy?”

“Can I answer honestly?”

“Of course!”

“You.”

Hanbin’s ears start to turn red. He fans himself with his hand. “It’s getting hot. Can I open the window?” he asks.

Bobby laughs and opens the window at Hanbin’s door. “Better?”

Hanbin feels the wind on his face before closing the window. “Better.”

Bobby pulls up in Hanbin’s driveway and they both sit still for a few seconds. 

“So.. this is me.” Hanbin says awkwardly.

“I’ll walk you to your door.” Bobby says and unbuckles his seatbelt. 

Hanbin grabs his hand and stops him. “No. I’ll be fine. I can go on my own.” He says.

“You sure?”

“Yeah."

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

They were both looking at each other for a few seconds until Bobby says, “Are you sure you can go alone?”

Hanbin nods without looking away. He was still staring at Bobby. Bobby looks down at his hand which Hanbin was still holding. Hanbin notices and looks at both their hands. He pulls away immediately and gets off the car as fast as he can. He runs to their door embarrassed while Bobby was smiling from ear to ear. 

He waits for Hanbin to get in before he drives away.

*insert texts*

UPDATE 11 

*insert texts to outing*

The boys meet up at Hanbin’s house early in the morning for their trip. They decided to use two cars: Junhoe’s and Bobby’s. Hanbin and Yunhyeong rode with Junhoe while Chanwoo and Jinhwan rode with Bobby. They decided to go to Anmok beach. It was a two and a half hour drive to Gangneung so they left as soon as everyone arrived. They didn’t want to waste time since they only had the weekend.

It was a spontaneous trip so no reservations were made. There were only two rooms available in their preferred hotel so they split up in two groups. Four would take the quad which had two queen-sized beds and the other two would take the double which could only occupy two. “Dibs on Hanbin and the double room!” Yunhyeong shouts. Hanbin whines and everyone laughs. “Why meeee?” Hanbin asks. “Why? Why? I like you.” Yunhyeong says teasing Hanbin. 

They all take their bedroom keys and settle down at their rooms. Jinhwan decided to take a shower while Bobby and Chanwoo were on their beds playing PUBG on their phone. Junhoe was dying of boredom so he goes to the other room across the hall. “Romantic.” Junhoe says and laughs as he peeks through the inside of the room. “Perfect for me and Hanbinnie.” Yunhyeong says while folding his clothes and taking them to the hotel room closet.

“Where’s Hanbin?” Junhoe asks.  
“Balcony.” Yunhyeong points out to the glass window covered by a thick curtain.  
Junhoe walks out and sees Hanbin standing by the balcony railing looking at the view. He stands beside him and admires the view as well. “Pretty huh?” Hanbin says. Junhoe nods. “Wanna take a walk?” Junhoe asks and Hanbin nods. 

They walk back in the room and Hanbin changes into slippers. “Yunhyeongie were taking a walk at the beach okay?” Hanbin shouts out to Yunhyeong who was now in the showered taking a bath. “Arasseo!” Yunhyeong shouts back and the two leave.

The weather was perfect. It wasn’t too hot and it wasn’t cold either. The two walks barefoot feeling the warm sand on their feet. When they get nearer to the water, they sit at the sand and admire the waves crashing calmly. Bobby, who decided to chill at their balcony after a game with Chanwoo, watches Junhoe and Hanbin from a far. He wonders what they talk about since they always seem to have their own world. And then he remembers it used to be him on Junhoe’s place. It used to be him who pushed Hanbin to the water making him all mad because the water was cold. It used to be him sitting beside Hanbin at the sand talking about anything under the sun. It used to be his shoulder Hanbin used to rest his head at when he got tired. “Sad.” He whispers to himself. 

Chanwoo walks out with a can of beer on his hand. He hands one to Bobby and sips after tapping Bobby’s can with his. “It’s hardly noon. We haven’t even eaten yet.” Bobby says. “That’s breakfast.” Chanwoo responds. Bobby shakes his head but drinks the beer anyway. Chanwoo notices Junhoe and Hanbin sitting at the shore. 

“You left me to play PUBG alone to stalk your ex?” Chanwoo asks annoyed. 

Bobby laughs. “I didn’t even know they were out there.” 

Chanwoo glares at him and looks back at the view. 

“Junhoe has been there for Hanbin like no one has.” Chanwoo says out of the blue. “Hanbin had it hard when you came back but it was so much harder for him when he left.” He adds.

Bobby doesn’t respond but listens. 

“He started getting panic attacks and anxiety. He’d lock himself up in his room for days and not answer any of our calls. It was hard for us because he was too far away but Junhoe… it didn’t matter to him. One call from Jaeho or Hanbin’s mom, he went straight to the airport to go to Hanbin. He has always been the only one Hanbin listened to. He would stay for days until Hanbin felt better and come back again when it got worse for Hanbinnie again. He was leaving behind work but he didn’t care. His dad got furious every time he left but it didn’t stop him. I guess it’s just a matter of priorities. Hanbin was his. Still is.”

“But he’s okay now? Hanbinnie?”

“Yeah. Very. He eventually got better when he was there. And when he came back, it was as if nothing happened. He had his annoying smile back on his face again. He was noisy again. Just like the old Hanbin.”

Bobby nods. “Do you think it’s okay that I’m around?”

“As long as you don’t leave again.”

Bobby chuckles. “I’m not going anywhere. Not this time.” he assures Chanwoo.

“Then it’s all good. We’re all just thinking about Hanbin. But he loves having you around so I guess there’s no problem.”

“Junhoe doesn’t seem like he likes having me around.”

“He knows more than anyone of us what Hanbin went through. Hanbin tells him stuff he doesn’t tell us. It’s just Hanbin too he’s thinking of.”

“I’m sorry. I’m always going to be sorry. Towards you guys and especially to Hanbin.”

“Stop. It’s not your fault. Even Hanbin knows that. Life doesn’t always go according to plan. What matters is now. We’re all here, still doing what we always do. Everything’s changed but everything’s the same.” Chanwoo says looking proud of himself. “I feel so cool after saying that. I sound like a real grown ass man.” 

Bobby laughs. They both toast to the morning and gulp down the last of their beer.

*new time*

“Yah! Let’s go eat. Yunhyeong made reservations.” Jinhwan tries waking up Bobby and Chanwoo who went back to sleep after the can of beer.

Bobby wakes up to the sound of food and wakes Chanwoo up who was beside him. Jinhwan goes ahead of them and they follow. Hanbin, Yunhyeong and Junhoe were already at the restaurant when they got here. Yunhyeong had a menu on his hands and Hanbin and Junhoe were sharing one. Junhoe had his face leaning on Hanbin’s arm and was pointing at the dishes he wanted to eat. Hanbin nodded and told Yunhyeong while Yunhyeong took notes. Bobby notices there were extra menus so he wondered why Junhoe and Hanbin had to share. He pushes the thought away and hands out the menus to Jinhwan and Chanwoo. Once they settle their order, they wait their food to arrive.

“My head hurts.” Chanwoo complains.

“No one told you to drink at 9 in the morning.” Jinhwan says. 

“What are we gonna do after lunch?” Bobby asks.

“Juneya, they have jetski’s. Let’s try it out.” Jinhwan says.

“Nice. Okay.” Junhoe says.

“I wanna go too.” Chanwoo says. “Bobby let’s go too.”

“Call.”

“How about you two? What are you going to do?” Jinhwan asks Yunhyeong and Hanbin.

“We’re going to build sandcastles.” Yunhyeong says in a cute way to annoy Hanbin.

“Aish. Hajima.” Hanbin says and they all laugh.

“They have museums and markets. Wanna check it out? This town is actually pretty nice we can rent out a car and take a drive around. You can take pictures too.” Yunhyeong suggests.

“Sounds good. Call.” Hanbin says.

They all plan out their day separately and decide to meet up for dinner. After lunch, the four go straight up to the beach after changing into swimming clothes. They rent out 2 jetski’s. Jinhwan rode with Junhoe and Chanwoo with Bobby. They drive around the ocean for minutes before going back. They play volleyball afterwards and they stop after a few games. They go back to their room to shower and take a nap before dinner.  
Yunhyeong and Hanbin had a convertible waiting for them at the hotel lobby. Yunhyeong lost rock paper scissors to Hanbin so he had to drive. Hanbin took photos of the town with his film camera. They stop by museums and explore. Before heading back to the hotel, they go to the market and buy ingredients for dinner. Yunhyeong decided to grill meat for everyone so he bought everything he was going to need.

*insert posts*

*new time*

Dinner came and Yunhyeong and Hanbin started preparing the things they were was gonna need to grill. Bobby and Chanwoo were taking out blocks of wood for their bonfire and Junhoe and Jinhwan was setting up the tent. 

“Yah kimbap, I forgot, you should’ve invited Donghyukie.” Jinhwan shouts out to Bobby who was struggling to light up their bonfire.

“He’s leaving for Japan tomorrow. Work.” Bobby says.

Jinhwan nods. 

“How did they become friends?” Hanbin asks Yunhyeong who was tearing up while slicing the onions.

“Who?” he asks.

“Bobby and Donghyuk. I found out Donghyuk cheated on him.”

“Bobby knew he had his shortcomings towards their relationship so he really couldn’t blame Donghyuk for looking for someone who made him a lot better than he did.”

“Is that an excuse to cheat? He could’ve just ended the relationship.”

“I’m pretty sure Donghyuk had his reasons. Who are we to judge right? And you know Bobby; he likes to see the good in people. No matter how bad they treat him.”

“True. He hasn’t changed.” Hanbin says staring at Bobby who was laughing and bickering with Chanwoo.

“Nope. He hasn’t.” 

Hanbin goes back to seasoning the meat and he smiles at the thought of Bobby. 

“What are you smiling about?” Yunhyeong asks. 

“Huh? I wasn’t.” Hanbin says.

“You still like him don’t you?” 

“Of course I like him.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Yunhyeong teases. 

“I don’t understand you. I’ll go start grilling these.” Hanbin points at the meat and leaves the table to go to the griller. 

Jinhwan and Junhoe has finished setting up the tent after a lot of analysing and calling each other “stupid.” Junhoe goes to Hanbin to help put with the grilling. Hanbin takes a piece of meat and takes it to Junhoe’s mouth. Junhoe opens his mouth wide and takes the meat in. “Oh, that’s good.” he says and hi-fives Hanbin. 

He helps out Hanbin grill the meat left. Yunhyeong was preparing other dishes and setting up the table.

Chanwoo and Bobby finally got their bonfire up with the help of Jinhwan after a long time. They dance around it and they drop down lying in the sand. “This is even more tiring than four hours at the gym.” Bobby says as he catches his breath. 

“I don’t go to the gym but I get you.” Chanwoo says.

They lie for a few more minutes before rushing to get up when Jinhwan calls them out to eat. Hanbin slices out the last big piece of meat and serves it at the middle of the table. Everyone sniffs in the smell of the meat and they all get ready to eat. They all say grace before they dig in. 

*insert posts night bonfire*

After dinner, they all head to the bonfire for drinks. Chanwoo and Junhoe carries out the cooler full of beer and they all sit around the bonfire. Chanwoo hands out beer one by one and they start drinking. 

After a lot of laughing and at least 4 bottles each, Jinhwan suggests to play a game. “What game?” Yunhyeong asks. 

“Hmmm, Fool’s Game?” Jinhwan suggests. “Aish I suck at this game.” Junhoe says. “You suck at every game.” Chanwoo responds. Junhoe kicks off sand towards Chanwoo’s direction. “Yah!” Chanwoo shouts. They all laugh at the silliness of the two. “Let’s play! I’ll start!” Jinhwan says.

This game is played when a player starts by saying a number between 1 to 5 while showing a different number with their hand. The next player has to say the number has to say a number of fingers the previous player has up while showing a different amount with their hand and so on.

They all play for a few rounds until Yunhyeong was already dancing around the bonfire because he was already too drunk. Junhoe and Chanwoo were fighting about something nobody understood what and Jinhwan was already starting to throw a fit. Everyone was already so drunk except for Hanbin and Bobby who were good at the game so they didn’t have to drink that much while playing. Hanbin was taking videos of everyone with his phone while Bobby was laughing his ass out at Jinhwan who was arguing with a bottle of beer. 

“I think we have to bring them up now.” Hanbin says laughing.

Bobby fell down laughing because of Jinhwan and his bottle of beer. 

“Chakaman. I can’t breathe.” He says still laughing his ass out. He takes time to find air and get up to help Hanbin carry their friends. Chanwoo and Junhoe walked arm in arm to the room and Hanbin and Bobby assisted them from behind. Jinhwan had his arm wrapped around Hanbin’s neck and Yunhyeong around Bobby’s. They go to Bobby’s room first to send the three. Junhoe and Chanwoo take one bed and Hanbin assists Jinhwan at the other. 

“Bed!” Yunhyeong says and lies down beside Jinhwan. 

“I have to clean up the mess downstairs first. I’ll get him after.” Hanbin says. 

“I’ll help you.” Bobby offers and Hanbin nods.

They take the elevator down and they start cleaning up the bottles at the sand. Hanbin counts the bottles as he throws them in the huge plastic bag bobby was holding. 

“36. 36 bottles. We finished 36 bottles of beer tonight.” He says amused.

“That explains why they’re so drunk.” 

Bobby says. “Are you not drunk?” 

“I was earlier.” Hanbin laughs.

“Same.”

They finish cleaning out the bottles and the dining area. Bobby kills out the bonfire before they head up the room. 

Hanbin struggles to wake Yunhyeong up for he was dead drunk. “You can leave him. I don’t mind sleeping at the floor.” Bobby says. “I’ll walk you to your room.” 

“Are you sure?” Hanbin asks.

“Yeah. I’ll be fine, don’t worry. It’s just one night.”

Hanbin was tired so he nods. They walk to his room silently and Hanbin opens the door. “Good night, Hanbinnie.” Bobby says.

Hanbin felt guilty. “You can stay here. I have space.”

“No it’s okay. I’m okay. You should rest.”

“I insist.” Hanbin says. He opens the door wide and Bobby walks in hesitantly.

“Hanbinnie, I really will be fine.”

“No it’s okay really. You can take the bed I’m not sleepy yet anyway I’ll be out the balcony writing or something.” He says.

Bobby nods. “Do you have an extra towel?” he asks. Hanbin points in the bathroom. Bobby proceeds to take a shower and Hanbin takes one more beer from the hotel room fridge. He sits at the edge of the bed and turns on the TV while waiting for Bobby to finish taking a bath. He sips on his bottle and laughs at the show he was watching. 

Bobby walks out the bathroom half naked. The closet was by the TV so he walks to it and takes out Yunhyeong’s sleeping clothes. Yunyhyeong was the only one who took out his clothes from his baggage so he knew it was his. Hanbin watches him change from behind. It was the first time seeing Bobby without a shirt on after a very long time. His body was leaner and his muscles were more defined. He puts on pyjamas and leaves himself shirtless. Hanbin remembers Bobby doesn’t sleep with a shirt on. “Oh boy.” He whispers to himself. 

“Huh?” Bobby says drying his hair with his towel, walking towards Hanbin.

“Huh? Nothing. I’ll go take a bath now.” Hanbin says. He hands out his bottle of beer to Bobby and walks out of the room.

He takes a warm shower and changes inside the bathroom. He walks out and Bobby wasn’t there. He peeks out the balcony and there was Bobby sitting by the coffee table with feet up on another chair. He takes a bottle from the fridge and joins Bobby outside. 

“That’s my hoodie.” Hanbin says.

“Oh. It’s cold out here. I’ll take it off later.” He says.

Hanbin laughs. “I was just teasing you.”

Bobby chuckles. “I love this." He says as they listen to the waves crashing.

Hanbin nods. They sit in silence for a few minutes until it starts raining so they rush back in. Bobby walks towards the closet and takes a hanger. He takes off the hoodie and hangs it in. 

“I really don’t mind you wearing it you know?” Hanbin says.

“I know. I don’t like sleeping with anything on.” Bobby says. He sits beside Hanbin on the bed and they clink their bottles. “I’m really happy to be here with you guys. It’s been a while.”

“Me too.” Hanbin says as he looks at Bobby. They stare at each other’s eyes as they both lean in nearer to each other.

“Hanbin ah…” Bobby whispers when his face is just an inch from Hanbin. Hanbin doesn’t let him finish his sentence but crashes his lips to Bobby’s. Bobby kisses him back with the same energy and takes his hand up to Hanbin’s neck. Hanbin opens his mouth giving Bobby’s tongue an entrance. Bobby pulls Hanbin closer to him until Hanbin was straddling him. The continued to make out and as the seconds went by, the more urgent the kissing has become. Bobby slips his hand inside Hanbin’s shirt and takes them off for him. Bobby tilts his head as Hanbin starts kissing his neck down to his chest and down to his abs. Bobby moans at every kiss Hanbin was giving him. 

Hanbin takes the top of Bobby’s pyjamas and pulls them down slowly. He leaves a trail of kisses at Bobby’s hips as he pulls down the garment slowly and slowly. Bobby watches Hanbin at every step he does and tilts his hips helping Hanbin successfully pull down his pyjama. He licks the top of Bobby’s hard and makes him enter slowly until he’s down deep his throat. He massages Bobby’s hard with his mouth for a few minutes and Bobby moans at how good Hanbin was. Once he pulls away, Hanbin kneels on the bed and Bobby gets up to his knees too. He twists Hanbin around so his back is in front of him. He takes his hands up feeling Hanbin’s body as he nibbled on his ear. Hanbin moaned at Bobby’s action and bobby starts kissing Hanbin’s neck from behind. They’re going slow this time. 

Bobby leaves kisses at Hanbin’s back and pushes him slowly down the bed leaving his hips feeling his hard on from behind. Bobby pulls down Hanbin’s pyjamas slowly and he reaches out to kiss Hanbin pressing himself unto Hanbin’s behind. He pulls away from the kiss and he rubs his long wet hard on before slowly entering Hanbin. He takes the tip of his penis in his hand and assists it as he enters Hanbin slowly. Bobby shallows thrusts Hanbin to stimulate the opening until he slowly gets in deeper and deeper. Hanbin groans when Bobby gets in fully. Bobby starts thrusting Hanbin deeply and they both moan in unison at how good they both felt. 

They make love until they both cum together. Bobby lies flat on his back on the bed with his arms spread wide and Hanbin lies down on his arm. Bobby takes him in and wraps hi arms around Hanbin. Hanbin looks him in the eye and Bobby takes Hanbin’s hair away from his face gently. Hanbin scrunches his nose and Bobby kisses the top lightly. Hanbin wraps his arms around Bobby and rests his head on Bobby’s chest. He kisses his chest and he bites it. Bobby groans loudly. “It hurts.” Bobby cries. Hanbin laughs and kisses his bite mark. He leaves more kisses and Bobby’s body and he kisses him on the lips. “More kiss. It still hurts.” Bobby talks like a baby. Hanbin shakes his head. “No more kisses. Time to sleep.” He talks back cutely. Bobby giggles. 

He pulls Hanbin as if there was any closer they could get. He draws gentle circles at Hanbin’s back until Hanbin falls asleep. He kisses Hanbin on the forehead and he rubs his thumb gently on his lips. “I missed you.” He whispers and then he goes to sleep.

12th UPDATE

*tweets from the night before*

4am

Hanbin wakes up with the sight of Bobby sleeping calmly in front of him. He smiles and he takes his hand up to Bobby’s face to remove the hair covering his eyes. He runs his finger in Bobby’s brows down to his cheeks and then he rubs his lips gently. “What are you doing, Kim Hanbin?” he asks himself. He leaves a kiss on Bobby’s lips before getting up to take a shower. 

Bobby wakes up a few hours after alone. He gets up to search the bathroom and the balcony but Hanbin wasn’t there. He looks down by the beach and sees his friends, including Hanbin, playing volleyball. Jinhwan sees him from below and signals him to come down. Bobby goes back in the room and puts on a shirt before coming down.

“Just in time for breakfast.” Chanwoo says and hands him the ball. They have just finished playing. Jinhwan and Yunhyeong tap his back as they walk past him. Junhoe and Hanbin were following behind. “Meet you at the restaurant.” Hanbin tells Junhoe. Junhoe nods and goes ahead without acknowledging Bobby. 

“Hey.” Bobby says and smiles. “Hey.” Hanbin says back. “You were gone when I woke up.” Bobby tells Hanbin as they begin to walk back slowly to the hotel. “Uh, yeah. I woke up early so I went for a walk then we played ball.” Bobby nods. Hanbin grabs Bobby’s arm and to stop him from walking. He stands in front of him and says, “Uhm, can we not tell anybody about what happened?” Bobby looked confused. He didn’t get why not but he nods. “Okay. If you don’t want to.” He says. “Okay.” Hanbin says and releases a breath. “Thank you.” He adds. They walk awkwardly back to the hotel to meet the others in the restaurant. 

After breakfast, they all go back to their rooms to chill since they had a few more hours to waste. Hanbin had a prior engagement so he starts packing to leave earlier than the others. Jaeho offered to pick him up but Hanbin insisted that Junhoe would drive him. 

Hanbin says his farewell to Yunhyeong while Yunhyeong watched TV in their room. He walks to the end of the hall and goes in the other guys’ room. 

“You going now?” Jinhwan asks.

“Yeah. I gotta go.” Hanbin says.

“See you back in the city.” Chanwoo says and Hanbin nods.

Bobby didn’t know Hanbin had to leave earlier than they did so he was surprised. He walks towards him who was standing by the door waiting for Junhoe.

“You’re leaving?” Bobby asks.

Hanbin feels awkward around him but he tries not to show it. “I have a schedule.” He says without being able to look at Bobby’s eyes for a long time.

“Is Jaeho hyung picking you up?”

“No. Junhoe’s driving me.”

“Oh.” Bobby’s heart sinks. He has always been jealous of how Junhoe meant to Hanbin and he feels worse now more than ever. 

Junhoe walks out of the bathroom and grabs his bag from the ground. “Let’s go.” He tells Hanbin.

Hanbin nods and says goodbye to Jinhwan and Chanwoo. “We’re going now.” He tells Bobby. 

Bobby nods. “Drive safe.” He says to both Junhoe and Hanbin.

Hanbin nods. Junhoe takes Hanbin’s bag and they walk out the room.

“Is there something you want to tell me?” Junhoe asks a few minutes on the road.

Hanbin was staring out the window while playing with his fingers. He looks at Junhoe unable to say anything.

“Why are you so nervous?” Junhoe asks.

“I’m not.” Hanbin says.

“You’re fidgeting.” 

Hanbin stops playing with his fingers and takes a deep breath.

“Please don’t judge me or don’t get mad.” Hanbin begs.

“Hanbin please?” Junhoe says as if it will ever happen.

“I slept with him.”

“How do you feel?” Junhoe doesn’t give a reaction.

“Why aren’t you surprised or anything?”

“Because I saw it coming the moment I didn’t see one of you in our room last night.”

Hanbin slaps his head. “I’m so stupid. Why did I do that? I was drunk but not that drunk and it seemed like a very good idea last night and now…”

“I’m guessing it meant something for you?”

“It didn’t. It doesn’t. I just don’t want him to think that it meant something.”

“Did you talk to him about it?”

“I told him not to tell anyone. Do you think he understood what I meant by it?”

“I guess?”

“I’m doomed.”

Junhoe laughs. “Stop stressing about it. It happened. Move on. It was a hook-up; a one night stand. Think about it that way. I’m pretty sure he thinks the same way.”

“You think?” Hanbin asks all worried.

“Well, I’m not sure but..” Hanbin punches his arm and Junhoe laughs. “Stop I’m driving.”

“You’re useless.”

“Really though don’t worry about it too much. You’re adults I’m sure he understood.”

Hanbin nods and releases a sigh. 

They both drive back home for a few hours. Junhoe drops Hanbin off at the company and Hanbin leaves in his van for his next schedule as soon as he arrives. Junhoe drives home and laughs at the thought of Hanbin. “Aigoo Kim Hanbin, you’re still whipped after all this time.”

*a few days after*

Bobby waits for BI to come out of the building. His back is leaning towards his card door and hands crossed with a plastic hanging. He watches the dust on the ground as he plays with them with his foot and he looks up as soon as he hears BI's footsteps. 

“Hey.” Bobby says half smiling, leaning at his car door, as Hanbin walked towards him. 

“Hey.” Hanbin says back and stands in front of Bobby. Bobby hands out a plastic bag of tteokboki. 

“I thought you may be hungry.”

Hanbin gives him a faint smile and takes the plastic from his hands. “Thank you.” He says and then there was dead silence for a couple of seconds. 

“How have you been? I’ve been trying to call you.” Bobby asks.

“Just here. I’ve been busy. I’m sorry.” Hanbin explains. Bobby nods. They stay standing awkwardly for a few minutes. 

"I would've come sooner but it's been a hectic week too." Bobby explains. 

BI nods then then there’s awkwardness between them again. 

"I really just wanted to see if you were okay." Bobby says shyly.

BI smiles. "I’m okay. I’ve been okay. How about you?”

"Honestly?" Bobby asks. It makes BI nervous. He wasn't sure if he wanted to hear it. 

Bobby knows it made Hanbin uncomfortable so he laughs. "I'm fine. Don't worry about me. And I haven't told anyone so..."

"Thank you." 

Bobby nods. "Well it's good to see you're doing fine. I'll go now." He says hoping BI would stop him and talk some more. But BI just nods. 

BI takes a step back and Bobby opens his car door. He takes a step in and BI grabs his arm and pulls him out suddenly. He pulls Bobby closer to him and he crashes his lips to Bobby's. He leaves a quick but lingering kiss and he runs back inside the building without even giving Bobby a chance to react. Bobby is frozen. He stays still for a couple of seconds before he snaps out of it. He touches his lips with his cold fingers and asks himself if it really happened. He gets back to his car, still in disbelief of what happened and he drives home.

Bobby lies on his bed after taking a shower and changing into his pj's and contemplates if he should text Hanbin. He types messages and deletes them before even sending it. "What should I say?" he scratches his head and he starts typing again. "That's lame." he says and he deletes the things he has typed. "Aish!!!" he throws his phone away from him and decides not to text him. "I'll wait for you to text me. Please text me." He says as he grabs his phone back. He waits for a text until he falls asleep. 

*hanbin texts Junhoe*

*over a week later*

BI has been coming to work with flowers and food waiting for him since the kiss. Bobby has been extremely busy with work but he made sure to take time to send Hanbin stuff that he knew would make him smile. Bobby made all these effort but got nothing in return. BI never called or texted Bobby after the kiss. He hasn’t said thanks for the gifts Bobby had sent out. It’s been over a week but Bobby got nothing. He wanted to go to the company to check up on him but BI didn’t answer calls so wasn’t sure if he really was there. It’s been bothering him so bad he decides to talk his feelings out with the one person who he knew understood: Chanwoo.

He calls Chanwoo and invites him out for drinks while driving. Chanwoo was too tired to go out so he drives to Chanwoo’s pad instead.

“I told you I was tired.” Chanwoo says he as he opened the door for Bobby. 

Bobby walks in with bottles of beer in his hand and a plastic of blood sausages and chicken on the other. He walks straight to Chanwoo’s room and scans it as he was halfway in. He sees his computer and laughs at the sight of a paused game. 

“Gaming really can be tiring.” He says and laughs. He walks back to the living room and places the plastics on the table.

Chanwoo glares his eyes and acts annoyed. “I had my night planned out perfectly and you weren’t a part of it. Do you know how much I’ve been waiting for this day? This is the only day I get to play after a really long time and you come ruin it.”

“I’m still in love with Kim Hanbin.” 

Chanwoo stops whining and stares at Bobby who has already started drinking.  
Bobby looks at Chanwoo and nods as he sips from his bottle. He puts it down and he takes out the chicken and the soondae. “But he doesn’t feel the same way.”

Bobby has been asked the question and has denied his feelings towards BI but Chanwoo knew it wasn’t true so he wasn’t surprised of Bobby’s sudden confession.

“So you know?” Chanwoo asks.

Bobby takes another sip of beer and puts it down the table. “Know what?”

“You don’t.” Chanwoo gets his answer by Bobby’s expression.

“Know what?!” Bobby knew something was up.

Chanwoo rubs his head. “Hanbin’s dating someone.”

Bobby stops and stares at Chanwoo. “Please tell me you’re kidding.”

“I wish I was, man. But it’s true. He brought him to dinner last time. You were in Japan.”

Bobby releases a deep breath. He grabs his bottle and finishes it. He stands up, takes his car keys, and leaves without saying a word.

“Ya! Don’t do anything stupid!” Chanwoo calls out and the door makes a loud banging sound.

*a few weeks later*

Chanwoo’s company was launching a new fashion line and the company agreed to take BI as the new brand ambassador. BI had participated in shoots for the magazine spread and the billboards. He was one of the biggest fashion influencers in the country. He was a trendsetter so it was a win situation for the company.

The launch was going to consist of a fashion show and an after party. BI was booked to model in the fashion show along with Jinhwan and Yunhyeong which was happening later that night. The guy he was dating, Jaewon, was booked as one of the models for the fashion show also. They met at one of the editorial shoots. 

Everyone was going to be there. His family and his close friends. Though he has introduced Jaewon to the crew, his family, especially his parents didn’t know about him yet but he was confident they would love him.

Jaewon was all around handsome. He was kind, talented, funny, and his personality seemed to connect with Hanbin’s. Hanbin found himself smitten with Jaewon only a few days of knowing each other. And Jaewon felt the same with Hanbin. Their relationship was simple, uncomplicated, and genuine. They went out every day the first week they met and found out a lot about each other. They had the same taste in music, they both loved photography, and they both had complicated relationships in the past which made them understand each other more. Hanbin felt so comfortable towards Jaewon. He didn’t feel the need to try or to pretend. He felt like he could be himself with him and that surprised him because he really didn’t know how to interact with strangers but with him, it was so easy. 

Hanbin told Junhoe first about Jaewon. Junhoe saw how happy Hanbin was while he talked about him so he didn’t have a problem with him dating. He’s been with Hanbin through his lowest point and it was the first time he saw him happy and what surprised him was that it was a different kind of happy. It was like he was thirteen and in love again. 

*post pre-fashion show*

Jaewon was introduced to everyone during dinner after the fashion show. He sat with Hanbin, the boys, and their parents at one table. Hanbin's mom was very pleased to meet Jaewon. She's heard so much about him and she's been dying to meet him. 

It was a nice, quick dinner with good conversations in between. The parents leave to go home while the guys move to Club Gabbia for the after party. 

Bobby arrives at the club late. He has been MIA for weeks. He hasn’t been showing up at dinner with the guys for he was extremely busy with work. Chanwoo threatened to kill him if he didn't show up at the launch so he made sure he'd go. He had a lot of work to finish so he couldn't go to the fashion show earlier. Once he walks inside, he sees Jaeho by the bar talking to Junhoe. His heart beats faster because he thought it was Hanbin but turns out he wasn't. Jaeho sights Bobby and signals that the boys were upstairs. Bobby nods and proceeds upstairs. As soon as he gets the sight of the people upstairs, it's Hanbin he sees first. He was laughing at what the guy beside him was whispering. 

Bobby stared at Hanbin laughing and smiling for a couple of seconds as if nobody else existed in the room before Chanwoo grabs Bobby's arm and pulls him to introduce to some of Chanwoo's friends. Bobby walks with Chanwoo and looks back at Hanbin. Hanbin's attention was still at the guy he was with. Bobby looks back front and shakes the hands of everyone Chanwoo introduced. He excuses himself from Chanwoo and his friends and joins Jinhwan and Yunhyeong at the table.

"You came?" Jinhwan says and hands out a glass of whiskey to Bobby. 

"Yeah. I just got off work. How was the show?" Bobby gulps down the glass and asks for a refill why he tried to catch up at what he missed. 

"It was nerve wrecking but so exciting at the same time. I think I was made to be a model. Is it late to switch careers?" Jinhwan says. 

"He almost tripped." Yunhyeong bursts Jinhwan's bubble. Bobby chokes on his third glass of whiskey and laughs. 

After Jinhwan and Bobby finshes a bottle of whiskey, Hanbin walks towards their table and introduces the guy he was with. "Hey. This is Jaewon. Jaewonnie, meet Bobby." 

Jaewon reaches for Bobby's hand. Bobby gets up from the couch and smiles at Jaewon. He looks down at Jaewon's hand and he notices the ring Jaewon was wearing. He looks at Hanbin who was looking at him with an unexplainable expression and he looks back down at Jaewon's hand. He shakes it and he says, "It's nice to meet you." 

"Same." Jaewon says back nicely. 

Hanbin takes a seat beside Yunhyeong and Jaewon sits beside him. A waiter walks by and leaves 20 shot glasses of tequile on the table. They all take one and they toast to the night. Bobby takes another one and gulps it down. 

"Easy. We're not going anywhere." Yunhyeong says. 

"I forgot there are papers I need to look through for my meeting tomorrow. I'll go ahead." He leaves the table before Jinhwan and Yunhyeong could react. He walks to Chanwoo and asks permission to leave. 

"Wait i'm almost done." Chanwoo says talking about his conversation with his other friends. 

"Take your time. I have work to finish. Congrats on your new line, man. I'm so proud of you." He says and turns around immediately. Chanwoo grabs his arm and pulls him back. 

"Come on. You just got here." 

"I can't." 

Chanwoo understood what he meant. Bobby releases his arm from Chanwoo's grip and starts to walk away again. "You're not here for them. You're here for me." Chanwoo says as he tried to block Bobby from leaving. 

Chanwoo was begging him to stop while walking backwards as Bobby walked forward. Bobby's expression was changing. He was getting annoyed and irritated. "Come on man. What the heck? I want you here give me an hour I have other visitors." Chanwoo says one last time. Bobby grabs Chanwoo in the collar and shouts at him. "I said I can't!" He pushes Chanwoo away and starts walking towards the stairs. Chanwoo grabs his arm and makes him face him and punches him straight in the face. Bobby drops down on the floor with a bleeding lip and Jinhwan and Yunhyeong comes running towards Chanwoo to pull him away from Bobby. Guys in the club helped Bobby up but he pushes them all away and he runs down the stairs. 

He walks to the parking lot and when he reaches his car door he vents out his anger and punches the glass window with all his might. The window cracks broken and small pieces of glass gets in his face leaving tiny cuts. Junhoe, who saw everything that happened in the club, followed him out. Bobby was about to punch the window again until Junhoe hugs him from behind and throws him to the ground. Bobby drops down again but this time he stays there. He punches the ground with his bleeding hand so Junhoe pulls him up to stand. Bobby pushes Junhoe away and opens the door to his car. He starts the engine and he drives off the lot. 

Hanbin's wakes up to his phone ringing. He slides and answers the call without looking at the caller id for he was still half asleep. 

"Hello." He says with his morning voice. 

Nobody answers. 

"Hello? Who's this?" He asks again.

Nobody answers again. 

"I'm gonna drop the call now." He says with eyes still closed. 

"I'm sorry." The other line says before Hanbin pulled the phone away from his ear. 

"Who's this?" he asks and he hears sobbing. 

"I'm so sorry." 

"Bobby?" 

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry because I still love you. I thought I had a chance after we slept together and after you kissed me. I'm sorry for getting the signs all wrong. I'm sorry for assuming you felt the same way I did. I thought it meant something to you too." Bobby cries. 

Hanbin couldn't say anything. Bobby was clearly drunk and could possibly be saying nonsense but he had started crying. 

"I didn't want to believe Chanwoo when he said you were over me. But now it's clear to me that you are. I saw the ring on Jaewon's finger earlier. I know what that ring meant to you. You bought it before we got together and you said you were giving it to the person you were going to spend the rest of your life with. When we got together you said you weren't giving me the ring until we were engaged but that never happened. It hurts. It hurts, Hanbinnie. It hurts that I’m not the one you're spending the rest of your life with. It hurts but it's not your fault. It's not your fault." Bobby cried harder making it hard for him to speak. 

Hanbin was crying as hard as Bobby. He tried to not let Bobby know he was crying but he couldn't help it. 

"Please don't cry. Don’t cry baby please.” Bobby begs. “You deserve to be happy and it’s obvious he makes you happy. I’m just.. drunk.” He fakes a laugh. “I’ll be okay tomorrow. I’m sorry for bothering you. I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I love you so much, Kim Hanbin. I’m always gonna love you. One day I’m gonna wake up and not love you as much as I do right now but I’m still gonna love you then. And I might find someone new to love and be in love but I’m still gonna love you then. Always, Hanbinnie. Always.” He says and he drops the call.

13TH UPDATE

An hour after Bobby’s phone call to Hanbin, Hanbin gets up from his bed and proceeds to the shower. He washes his face then wipes it. He goes back to the room, sits at the edge of the bed and calls Junhoe. “Can you meet me at Han River?” he asks as soon as the call went through. “Hanbinnie it’s barely 5 what are you up to?” Junhoe complains still half asleep. “Please?” Hanbin begs and Junhoe suddenly knows something was up. “I’ll be there in 20 minutes.” “Thank you.” After dropping the call, he puts a hoodie, takes a mask from his dressing table and takes the first coat he sees. He drives to Han River and waits patiently for Junhoe at one of the benches. Bobby’s words replays over and over again in his head and as it does tears run down his face. 

Junhoe sights Hanbin from afar and walks towards him with two cups of coffee in his hands. As he got nearer, he notices Hanbin staring blankly obviously thinking about something. And then he saw tears in his eyes. Hanbin was too preoccupied to notice Junhoe had arrived. Junhoe places the coffee beside Hanbin on the bench and he walks in front of Hanbin. He squats down so that they’re eye to eye and he wipes Hanbin tears from his face. Hanbin touches his face and feels the wetness from his tears. “I didn’t even realize I was crying.” He laughs. “I must be going crazy. I’m sorry.” He adds. “No worries.” Junhoe says and gets back up. He takes the cups on the bench and hands one to Hanbin. “Coffee?” Hanbin takes one and Junhoe sits down beside him.

The both take a sip from their cup in unison and they both release a sigh after. Junhoe doesn’t say or ask anything. He waits for Hanbin to talk and it took a few minutes of silence before Hanbin did.

“Why does it still hurt?”

“Because you still love him and I don’t know why you keep denying it.”

“Maybe I do. But why don’t I want to be with him? How is it possible to love a person but don’t want to be with him?

“I love you but I don’t want to be with you. Well, not anymore. Maybe it’s a different kind of love you have for him now. Like the kind I have for you. Like the kind you have for me and our friends.”

“How does the love you have for a person change?”

“Hmmm. I think it has something to do with acceptance. Like how I accepted the fact that you’re never going to see me as anything else but a friend. And because I’ve accepted that fact I realized it’s because we’re not meant to be; we’re not made for each other.”

“You think we’re not meant to be? Bobby and I?”

“I think you’re the only one who knows the answer to that. Nobody knows your heart but you, Hanbinnie. Follow it. You two have a lot of history together. You both have loved and hurt each other. I think only if you’re willing to surpass everything that has happened between you, that’s when you know he’s the one.”

“What if I’m not?”

“Then I think it’s time to close the book. He’s been in your life for a very long time. Chapter after chapter after chapter. If you know nothing good will come out of it anymore, it’s not bad to end and close it. And this time for good. Throw the book away. Burn it if needed.” Junhoe says with conviction.

“It’s a pretty thick book.” Hanbin says regretfully.

“Heavy too.” Junhoe adds and they both laugh. “But not all books leave a good impact on our lives. Sometimes the shortest ones do than the big, thick ones.” 

Hanbin has his elbows in his knees, leaning forwards while Junhoe was leaned back on the bench. Hanbin looks up to Junhoe and smiles. “Thank you.” 

“What are you going to do without me?” Junhoe says boastfully and scoffs.

“I know. I know. I owe you my life, Sir.” Hanbin says and they both laugh.

Junhoe rubs the top of Hanbin’s head messing up his hair. “Stop crying, kid. At least do that for me.”

Hanbin smiles sadly and nods. “Wanna grab breakfast? My treat.”

“I was gonna go for a jog but free breakfast sounds better.” Junhoe smiles and they both get up and drive to one of their favourite diners. 

*insert breakfast tweets*

“You said they weren’t coming?” Bobby whispers angrily to Chanwoo.

“I said I think they’re not coming.”

“I fucking hate you.”

“It’s going to be fine. Nothing happened. Chill.”

“Yeah I didn’t cry my heart out the other night and told him I loved him. Yeah, it didn’t happen. Sure!” Bobby curses at Chanwoo.

“Can you stop acting like a little girl and just eat your dinner. Pretend it didn’t happen. You were drunk.”

Bobby glares at Chanwoo.

“Okay. Fine. I’m sorry. You wouldn’t come if I told you they were coming.”

“Of course I wouldn’t you dumbass.”

“Eaxctly my point. Let’s cheers!” Chanwoo raises his wine glass and taps it with Bobby’s.

The crew have decided to have dinner at Yunhyeong’s restaurant. Bobby didn’t want to come because he didn’t want to see Hanbin but Chanwoo insisted he wasn’t going to be there. Jinhwan and Junhoe was busy talking about work and business while Yunhyeong was entertaining guests outside. Hanbin and Jaewon were running late because of work. Once the couple arrives at the restaurant, Yunhyeong greets them upfront and tells them which room the guys were. Hanbin opens the door and the first person to greet him was Bobby who was heading out to go to the bathroom.

“Oh, shit.” Bobby splurts out as he was startled to see Hanbin when the door opened. 

Hanbin was taken aback by Bobby’s reaction upon seeing him. He gives Bobby a confused look and Bobby moves to the side of the door to give them space to enter. “I’m sorry I was startled. I was just.. nevermind.” Bobby says. Hanbin doesn’t react and enters the room with Jaewon. The couple take their seats and Bobby heads out to the washroom. 

He enters the washroom and locks the door behind him. He walks to the sink and wets his face with water. He grabs a bunch of toilet papers and wipes his face dry. 

*insert text to Chanwoo*

Bobby ignores Chanwoo’s text and was ready to leave. Just about as he was half way out of the restaurant, he notices his car keys weren’t in his pocket. “Aish. Jinjja, Jung Chanwoo.” He curses silently. He walks back to the room and the guys were busy chatting. Chanwoo looks at him almost laughing then he goes back to listening to the other guys talking and ignores Bobby. Bobby takes a seat beside Yunhyeong who was already back inside the room.

“You guys busy this weekend? There’s this new club in Gangnam. I think we should go.” Jinhwan offers an invite.

“That’s perfect! Chefs I went to school with in France are coming to Korea to visit and they said they want the whole “Korean Experience” so I guess a club includes that right?” Yunhyeong says.

“We can’t go. We’re going to be in Jeju this weekend.” Jaewon says.

Everyone’s attention moves to him. It was unlikely for Hanbin to plan a trip without saying anything to them.

“We are?” Hanbin asks obviously clueless.

“It was going to be a surprise trip but since we’re already talking about plans this weekend... only if you want to go though?” he asks for Hanbin to confirm. 

“Of course I do.” Hanbin says and smiles at Jaewon. The guys cheer while Bobby was having it. He gulps down the wine from his glass and pours himself another one. He wanted to leave but he didn’t want to seem immature and rude. 

“Yunhyeongie we’re out of wine.” Chanwoo informs Yunhyeong. 

“Let me get one outside wait.” Yunhyeong stands up but Bobby stops him. 

“I’ll go get it.” He stands up and rush outside to fetch more wine.  
“I’ll just use the washroom.” Hanbin whispers to Jaewon and proceeds outside leaving Jaewon who was busy chatting with Junhoe and the other guys. 

Yunhyeong had a walk-in pantry full of liquor and wine. Bobby was taking deep breaths pacing back and forth inside the room when Hanbin walks in.

“Hey.” Hanbin says. 

Bobby stops and turns around to see Hanbin standing by the door. “Hey.”

“Uhm, I just… I don’t want you to think I’m shoving my relationship with Jaewon in front of your face. I honestly didn’t know about the trip and…” 

Bobby stops Hanbin from talking, walks near him and holds both his arms with his hands. “Hey. I don’t think that. Not at all. You’re free to make plans or whatever you want to do in front of whoever. It’s okay. I’m okay. I don’t mind. Okay?” He assures Hanbin. 

Hanbin nods without looking at Hanbin obviously still shy and a little bit ashamed. 

“That call… that call was stupid and reckless and I obviously wasn’t thinking right. I’m sorry. Don’t let it get in your head. I shouldn’t have done that and I should’ve apologized earlier. I was just ashamed of what I did too, I didn’t know how to approach you. I’m sorry.” Bobby explains.

Hanbin looks up to Bobby who was looking at him too. They stare sadly at each other’s eyes. 

“Dude the wine?” Chanwoo walks in on them breaking the moment. “And Hanbinnie, Jaewon’s in the washroom looking for you.”

“Shit.” Hanbin says and rushes outside. 

Chanwoo gives a questioning look to Bobby. “We just talked.” 

“Look man, I’m all team double b ever since you guys started. I know you still love him and I know he still loves you. There’s a reason you guys aren’t together right now and one of those reasons is Jaewon. Don’t go there. We respect other people’s relationships. No matter how much I want you both to just get the fucking back together, I won’t tolerate any of this.” Chanwoo says earnestly. He walks past Bobby shoving him in the arm, pulls out a wine bottle and walks back the door. Before he’s out, Bobby grabs his arm turning him around.

“I told you we were just talking.” He says angrily.

“He has a boyfriend. You’re his ex-boyfriend. I wouldn’t think you just talked if I caught you inside a small closed space after saying you were just going to the washroom if I was Jaewon.” Chanwoo pulls his arm forcefully away from Bobby’s grip and walks out of the room leaving Bobby alone. 

Everyone was back in the room when Bobby walks back in. “I’m sorry. I have to go I have a breakfast meeting tomorrow.” He grabs his car keys on top of the table in front of Chanwoo and says farewell to everyone including Jaewon. He leaves his friends and drives away. He calls Donghyuk and asks if he was free to meet and luckily he was. They meet in one of their go-to pubs in Hannam-dong. 

Bobby starts with a bottle of beer while waiting for Donghyuk. It was a weekday so the place wasn’t crowded. Just a few people grabbing beer after work. 

Donghyuk rubs Bobby’s back from behind letting him know he had arrived. Bobby looks back and stands up to greet Donghyuk. He gives him a tight hug and Donghyuk laughs. He hugs Bobby back and he sits at the couch across from Bobby.

“I don’t believe you missed me that much. What’s up?” he asks as the waiter hands him a menu. “Just beer.” He tells him and gives the attention back to Bobby.

“Nothing’s wrong. I just really missed you my friend.” Bobby says.

“Hanbinnie?” 

Bobby looks down and nods like a little kid.

“Why? What happened now?” 

“Nothing. I’m just having a hard time accepting the fact that it’s over. It’s been over for a long time but a part of me always hoped for a plot twist. I guess it was just wishful thinking.”

They both stay quiet for a while and take sips from their bottle alternately. 

“Don’t you think that maybe the reason you’re still holding on is because you feel guilty? Because you hurt him bad and you want to make up for it?” Donghyuk asks.

“It’s never been about me or to make myself feel better Donghyukie. It’s just… it’s still him.”

“I think it’s time you make it about you. Go out. Meet new people. Date. Be happy. Get laid. We’re not getting any younger. What if he’s not the one for you and someone else is. Stop waiting for people to come to you because sometimes they never do.”

“But what if he is? The one for me?”

“You’ll never know until you let go. Everything will make sense in time; all those feelings. If two people are meant to be together, they’ll find their way back. It may take months, years, decades. But that doesn’t mean you have to suffer while figuring it out. Let go. You’ll be fine. I promise.”

Bobby grips Donghyuk’s hand. “Thank you.” Donghyuk gives him a reassuring smile. “Anytime.”

*insert jeju posts.*

Jaewon had planned a fun first day in Jeju. They drove around town to explore the island further and spent a lot of time eating and tasting dishes they’ve never tried before. Jaewon wanted to watch the sunset by the beach so they head to the house they rented out for the weekend to rest after lunch.  
“Hon, I’m gonna go take a shower first too before taking a nap okay?” Hanbin pops his head out from the bathroom to inform Jaewon.

Jaewon was taking out clothes from his luggage to change into since he just finished taking a bath. “Sure. Go ahead.”

Hanbin notices something weird about Jaewon. “Are you okay? You seem to be kind of out if it since this morning.”

“Yeah. I’m fine don’t worry. I think I had too much coffee earlier.” He fakes his laugh.

Hanbin ignores and proceeds to take a shower. He changes into comfortable clothes and he cuddles up to Jeawon on the bed who was looking at their photos from his camera. Hanbin squeezes his head in between Jaewon’s arms and looks at the photos as well. “I like that one.” He says. “I like this one.” Jaewon says as he lays his finger on Hanbin’s nose. He places the camera on top of the bedside table and he moves to his side. Hanbin was still lying on his left arm. He looks at Hanbin in the eyes and Hanbin looks at him back. He pushes away Hanbin’s hair from his face and Hanbin was just there staring at how beautiful his view was. Jaewon runs the back of his finger across Hanbin’s face and runs his thumb on Hanbin’s lips. He leans down and kisses Hanbin’s lips softly. He pulls away and he rubs Hanbin’s cheek with his thumb. 

“You’re the best thing that’s happened to me Kim Hanbin. THE best thing.” Jaewon leans down again and kisses Hanbin on the lips, this time longer. He opens his mouth slowly and Hanbin opens his giving Jaewon’s tongue and entrance. They make out slowly until things gets heated. Their kisses slowly evolved into heavy and intense ones. Jaewon was grinding on top of Hanbin as they were making out and Hanbin moved his pelvis up and down to make Jaewon feel his hard on. Hanbin moves his fingers to Jaewon’s torso and pulls his shirt up slowly. They both moan in unison with the kisses they were giving each other. Hanbin moves to be on top of Jaewon and lays Jaewon’s back slowly on the bed. He stares at Jaewon’s eyes for a second and he kisses him back on the lips. He kisses his chin and then a trail of kisses to the neck. 

Jaewon tilts his head up to give Hanbin’s kisses space. Hanbin moves lower to Jaewon’s chest. He bites and sucks the corner of Jaewon’s chest leaving a hickey. Jaewon groans and Hanbin laughs. He kisses the mark and he says, “Mine.” Jaewon nods and says, “Yours. All yours.”

Hanbin moves back to kissing Jaewon on the lips. He moves his hand underneath, untying Jeawon’s pajama’s. He pulls them down releasing Jaewon’s long hard on. He trails down kisses again until he reaches the tip of Jaewon’s length. He licks the tip softly before he takes him inside of his small mouth. He rocks his head back and forth until Jaewon dissolves into pleasure. As Jaewon was drowning in pleasure, he takes his length out of Hanbin’s now swollen lips and he pulls Hanbin to squat down the bed. Hanbin, now on his knees, grabs his member with one of his hand while the other helped him support his position and pulls his skin back and forth as Jaewon enters him slowly. Hanbin groans at how Jaewon felt inside of him and he releases moans as Jaeown thrusts in and out of him. 

Hanbin lets go if his member and grabs a pillow to grip into. It hurt but it was the good kind of hurt. He didn’t want it to stop soon. 

Jaewon grabs Hanbin’s waist assisting him as he thrusts in and out of him and he grabs Hanbin’s elbow with the other gripping it hard. He pulls Hanbin up until the back of his body is touching his without taking him out of Hanbin. He continues to make love to Hanbin as he grabs Hanbin by the neck in a choking position. They both moan at how good each other feels. Jaewon leaves kisses at Hanbin’s neck and back. “Baby I’m about to come.” He whispers at Hanbin’s ears. His voice arouses Hanbin even more. “Me too, baby.” He informs Jaewon. Hanbin squats back down and grabs his member and starts jerking off. Jaewon pulls out of Hanbin and plays with this as well until they both come in unison.

They both release deep breaths and panting. Hanbin lays flat on the bed and Jaewon lays beside him. “Come here.” Jaewon says. Hanbin moves closer to Jaewon and rests in his arm. Jaewon kisses the top of Hanbin’s head and says, “I love you.” Hanbin responds, “I love you too.” Before drowsing off.

Hanbin wakes up alone in his bed. He notices a note by the bedside table and takes it. “We can watch the sunset some other time. You were sleeping so well I didn’t want to wake you. Out to get dinner. I’ll see you later.” Hanbin smiles at the sweet note and gets up to use the bathroom. He washes his face and starts brushing his teeth. While looking at the mirror, he notices something. He was smiling. He was happy. Nothing felt heavy. And the thought of Bobby suddenly comes and his smile disappears. 

Jaewon unlocks the front door and Hanbin rushes to greet him. He runs to the door and Jaewon was carrying flowers in one hand. “You’re up already?” Jaewon asks. He hands out the flowers to Hanbin and Hanbin accepts them with the biggest smile on his face. “Yeah just now.” He takes the flowers to his nose and smells them. They walk in the house and Hanbin sits by the dining table to admire the flowers. “You like them? Jaewon asks. “They’re lovely.” He responds. “Good.” Jaewon says. He leans down and kisses Hanbin on the lips. “I got steak, greens, and potatoes.” He takes the bag of groceries from the dining table and takes it to the island in the middle of the kitchen. 

“I’ll cook the steak you make the mashed.” Hanbin says.

“Yes boss.” Jaewon esponds as he takes out the stuff from the bag.”

Jaewon works on the mashed while Hanbin starts cooking the steak. They chitchat about whatever they think of while they work. What’s good about them is that they understand each other very much. They know, like, and study the same things. They have the same views and beliefs on stuff too. They were the perfect match. 

“Hon, I’m leaving the mashed and the greens on the table okay? I’ll just change.” Jaewon says.

Hanbin nods while he finished up the second piece of ribeye. 

While waiting for the steak to finish cooking. Jaewon startles Hanbin from hugging him from behind. He hugs him tight and they sway side to side in rhythm to the music playing in the backround. “Can I ask you something?” Jaewon asks.

“Of course you can.” Hanbin responds. 

“Would you want to spend the rest of your days with me? Nights too.” Jaewon asks nervously. Hanbin turns off the stove quickly and turns around. He looks at Jaewon in the eye. He has already started tearing up. “I prepared a speech. I have it on my phone. But I can’t remember any of it. I’m so nervous.” His lips were shaking and his hands were trembling. 

Hanbin was stuck frozen looking at him. Jaewon takes out a small tiny box and he opens it. Hanbin sees the ring similar to the one Jaewon wore at the fashion show. The one Bobby saw. 

“Yunhyeong saw me wearing your ring and he explained what the ring meant to you. I took photos of the ring before giving it back to you. I had one made because I realized, it’s you I wanted to give that ring to. Kim Hanbin, you’re the one I see spending the rest of my life with. This rings means to me as how your ring means to you and it’s you I want to give it to. I know you made me wear the ring only because it looked better with the outfit I was wearing but I’m giving you this with the very sole reason that I want you and me. I want you and me in one house, spending mornings and nights together, we’ll go on trips and watch sunsets and take photos as much as we want. We’ll laugh and cry and fight and make up. I’m ready for all of it as longs as it’s with you.”

Hanbin was crying so much more than Jaewon now. He couldn’t say anything. He was just crying. It was so unexpected and it was so sweet. 

"I know it hasn't been long since we met but i'm serious about you and i'm serious about this." Jaewon wipes away Hanbin’s tears and wipes away his. “I’m telling you this now but I’m not rushing you to answer. Take your time. take all the time you need. Think about it. I’ll wait.”

Hanbin cries harder and nods. Jaewon pulls him in and hugs him tight. “I love you so much you have no idea.” He says and Hanbin continued to cry in his arms.

*the next day*

Bobby was drinking with his dad in his living room when their doorbell rings. He walks to the monitor to check who it was and he sees Hanbin standing outside. He walks back to the living room and stands there for a few seconds.

“What are you doing standing there? Who is it?” His dad asks. 

“It’s Hanbinnie.” He says.

“What are you waiting for? Let him in!” 

Bobby frowns. He stands for a few more seconds until the doorbells rings again. He leaves his dad in the living room and walks back to the door. He buzzes Hanbin in and he waits for him by the door. 

“Hi.” Hanbin says softly as he enters.

“Hey. What brings you here?” Bobby asks.

“I need to talk to you.” he says.

“Uhm, okay. We can talk in the garden. Uhm, appa is in the living room. We were drinking.”

“Oh, okay. I’ll go say hi.” Hanbin takes his shoes off and walks inside the house. He greets Bobby’s dad hello and they talk for a few minutes to catch up. Bobby fakes coughs signalling his dad to go to his room and sleep. His dad says his good night to Hanbin and enters his room.

“Let’s go? To the garden?” Bobby asks shyly.

Hanbin gets up from the couch and follows Bobby out.  
They both stand in the pool awkwardly. 

“So?” Bobby tries to start the conversation. 

“Jaewon proposed to me.” Hanbin looks at Bobby and Bobby was looking at him with eyes about to tear up. 4 words in and he was already about to cry. “And I want to say yes.” Hanbin’s voice cracked while he spoke. “I just.. I wanted you to hear from me first.”

It was now the both of them forcing themselves not to cry. Bobby was speechless. 

“Yesterday, Jaewon left me to get groceries. I went to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. And while I was brushing my teeth, I caught myself smiling. I never do that. It was weird. And then I realized that I was happy. I was smiling like an idiot because I was happy.” Hanbin was starting out. Tears was falling from his eyes and he wiped them as he continued to speak. “And then the thought of you suddenly came rushing in. And I noticed my smile go away. It felt as if I didn’t deserve to be happy because there was someone I was hurting. Jiwon ah, I want you to be happy and I want to be the one to make you happy. But right now…” Hanbin stops because he was now crying so hard. He takes a deep breath before talking again.

“But right now, I don’t know how to do that. I wish I did. I wish I could. But I can’t. I don’t know how to. There so much going on with you, with us. And I want to fix it but I don’t know where to start. And it's so frustrating not knowing what to do. It’s become so difficult with you. I could never tell how I really feel for you and it sucks because I know I love you but I don’t think love is enough between us.” 

Hanbin was trembling; Bobby too. Bobby takes Hanbin’s hand and grips it tight. This calms Hanbin a bit. “With Jaewon, it doesn’t feel heavy. It doesn’t feel complicated. It’s not stressful. It’s light, it’s warm, it’s easy, it’s happy. And I just really really want to be happy. And he makes me really really happy.” Hanbin cries. Bobby pulls him closer to him and hugs him. He wraps his arm around his back and the other rubs the back of his head. Hanbin leans in Bobby’s chest and cries more. Bobby looks up the sky trying to calm himself down and to stop himself from crying. He takes a few deep breathes until he’s calm enough to try to calm Hanbin down.

“Sshhh. You don’t have to feel guilty about being happy. Think of yourself for once. Stop thinking about the people around you. Especially me. Your happiness is what matters most Hanbinnie. And it’s what matters to me most. It’s not your job to fix me or make me happy and I shouldn’t have made you felt that it was. I am so sorry.” Bobby takes Hanbin face in both his arms and kisses his forehead. He looks him in the eye and apologizes again and again. “I want nothing more in life than for you to be happy. I’m so sorry for being so selfish thinking all this time that it would be with me. I can’t stop you from getting your fairy tale. You deserve your happy ending.” He kisses Hanbin’s the top of Hanbin’s head and hugs him for a very long time. 

Once the both of them have calmed down, they sit by the tea table at the edge of the garden. Bobby walks back out to the garden with two bottles of beer and water.

“Water or beer? I didn’t know which one you’d prefer.” He laughs.

Hanbin takes the bottle of beer. “Definitely.”

They both finish their bottle in silence.

“It’s late. I have to go.”

Bobby takes Hanbin hand and grips it softly. He takes it to his face and Hanbin rubs his face with his thumb. Bobby takes Hanbin’s hand to his mouth and he kisses them. “It’s time to let you go Kim Hanbin. I need to let go.” He kisses Hanbin’s hand one more time and he takes it back to his face. He leans towards it and he closes his eyes while he feel Hanbin’s touch. Tears fall from his eyes. Hanbin wipes them with his fingers as he tried to stop himself from sobbing again.

Hanbin wipes his tears and he looks up again to stop them from falling. 

“Did you bring your car? I’ll drive you home.” He offers.

“No. I rode with Jaeho. No need. I can take an uber.”

“I insist. It’s late. I’ll take you home. And my parents know you’re here. They’re going to kill me once they find out I left you to go alone.”

Hanbin smiles appreciatively. “Okay.”

“If you drive like this we’ll probably arrive at my house in the morning.” Hanbin says for Bobby was driving so slowly.

“Don’t rush me. It’s not easy to let go of the person I’ve loved for almost 20 years.” He teases.

Hanbin frowns. 

“Okay, okay I’m going.” Bobby laughs. 

Once they arrive outside Hanbin’s house, no one says a word for a few minutes. 

“I have to go.” Hanbin says.

“Don’t.” Bobby says and Hanbin frowns again. “I’m kidding. Go. Good bye my future ex love.” 

Hanbin gets off the car and Bobby opens the car window.

“Drive safely okay?” he tells Bobby. 

“I will. I don’t want to see you cry anymore and I’m pretty sure you’ll cry if I get into an accident so I’m going slowly.” Bobby teases Hanbin again.

“Yah! Stop it. It’s not funny.” 

“I’m sorry. I just wanted to see you smile. Smile for me. One last time.”

Hanbin gives him a fakes smile and Bobby laughs. Hanbin bursts out laughing also. 

“Bye.” Hanbin says one last time. He walks backwards as he waved his hand goodbye.  
“Go!! Go in!” bobby shouts from the car.

Hanbin nods and runs to his car door. Bobby knows Hanbin wasn’t going in until he left so he waves one last time and he drives off but this time, for the first time, he stops his car and he watched Hanbin turn around. He watched him open their door and he watched him slowly fade away from his eyes. 

14TH UPDATE

Bobby drives back home after making sure Hanbin got home safe. When he arrived, he notices their kitchen lights open. He goes to check and sees his mom making coffee. 

"You just got home?" his mom asks. 

"Hanbin came earlier. I drove him home. Why are you up in the middle of night?" Bobby asks concerned. 

"I don't know. Something's bothering me." His mom says. "Are you okay?" she asks. 

Bobby walks towards his mom and hugs her from behind as she stirred her coffee. His mom wraps her hands on top of Bobby's. She turns around and looks at Bobby. She knew he wasn't okay. He takes Bobby face in her hand and rubs his cheek with her thumb. Bobby closes his eyes and shed a tear. His mom wipes it away and Bobby wraps his arms around his mom.

“Do you want to talk about it?” His mom asks.

“I just want to stay in your arms for a few more minutes. I’ll be okay after.”

He rests his head on his mom's shoulder and he cries. His mom holds him in her arms and she lets him cry for as long as he needs.

 

*insert news about engagement* 

*group chat blows up*

Chanwoo has been contemplating on calling Bobby after the Hanbin’s engagement news. They haven’t spoken to each other since the incident at the restaurant and this was the longest time they haven’t spoken. It’s been bothering him how Bobby could probably be feeling after hearing the news so he gets up from the couch, turns off the baseball game he was watching, and grabs his car keys. He tries to contact Bobby and Bobby answers at the first ring. He rushes outside of his house and when he opens his door Bobby was standing right outside with his phone right by his ear. 

“I was just calling you.” Chanwoo says and laughs.

Bobby shows his phone to Chanwoo. “I just answered your call.” And laughs as well.

“You heard?” Chanwoo asks.

Bobby nods. “But that’s not why I’m here. I came to apologize.”

Chanwoo gives him a sad look and invites him inside.

Chanwoo takes two bottles of beer and proceeds to his balcony which was overlooking the city. He hands one bottle to Bobby who was leaned forward by the railing and they bump the tip of their bottle.

“He came to tell me the other night.” Bobby says.

“You knew before anyone else did?”

“I guess. He said he wanted me to hear the news from him.”

Chanwoo was speechless. He didn’t know what to say. All he knew was how much Bobby could be hurting.

“A part of me always thought it was going to be us in the end. I was just waiting for the right time. But now I get why that time never came.” Bobby lets out a disappointed laugh.

Chanwoo moves closer to Bobby and wraps his arm around Bobby’s shoulder. They both don’t say anything else and just stand there side by side. 

*later that day*

Junhoe was last to hear the news. He has been in a meeting the whole day and the only time he got to check his phone was late at night when he was about to go home. He drives to Han River and calls Hanbin to meet up at their usual meet up place. It takes more than an hour before Hanbin arrives.

Junhoe was standing across the benches watching the river flow. Hanbin stands beside him nervously. He knew Junhoe was upset because he knows he was the last to know.

“Are you sure about this?” Junhoe asks. He didn’t sound mad but he didn’t sound happy either. 

“Yes.” Hanbin responds.

“Does he make you happy?”

“Yes.”

“Has he made you happier than Jiwon ever did?”

“Don’t you think that’s unfair?” Hanbin starts to sound disappointed. He knew Junhoe was going to be upset for finding out late but he wasn’t expecting him to be unsupportive. 

“Do you love him?” Junhoe turns to face Hanbin who was already facing him.

“He loves me.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“I do.”

“More than you’ve ever loved anyone?”

Hanbin starts crying. “You are so unfair.”

Junhoe scoffs and turns to watch the river again.

“Why can’t you just be happy for me?” Hanbin cries.

“Do you still love Jiwon?”

Hanbin cries harder. “Jaewon makes me better. He makes me feel better. Is it wrong to ask for such comfort for the rest of my life? He loves me. He cares for me. He understands me.” Hanbin wipes away his tears strongly. 

Junhoe lets out a sigh. He was mad but he tried not to show it. Hanbin was really upset too so he tries to be as calm as possible. “People don’t’ get married just because things are easy. You can’t get married just because Jaewon is convenient for you. Time will come it will be hard. Maybe even harder than what you went through with Jiwon. Sure he’s seen the best of you but has he seen the worst? Have you seen him at his worst? This isn’t something you should be rushing to do. I don’t get why you’re rushing. Just think about it okay?” 

Junhoe listened to Hanbin cry a little more. He wanted to hug him and make him stop but he was too mad at him. “I’m not asking you to break up with him. I’m not asking you to get back together with Jiwon either. I just don’t want you rushing into things you’re not 100% sure of. Don’t act on impulse. This is a decision you’re going to live with the rest of your life.” He grabs Hanbin’s arms with both his hands and makes him stand in front of him. “If you can tell me it’s him you see spending the rest of your life with, maybe then I’ll be supportive. But not right now, Hanbinnie. You know better. You should know better.” 

Junhoe turns around and walks away. He leaves Hanbin crying by the river alone. It was the first time they fought and it was bad for the both of them. Junhoe has been nothing but supportive towards Hanbin but he can be overprotective when he knows it was needed. Junhoe wasn’t afraid of hurting Hanbin’s feelings as long as he knows it was for his good. Nobody speaks to Hanbin like that except for Junhoe. It annoyed Hanbin most of the time but after a while he realizes Junhoe is right. He was always right. This time, he wishes he wasn’t. He didn’t have a single doubt about Jaewon until this conversation with Junhoe.

 

*the next day*

Jeawon and Hanbin was having a quiet lunch at home before Jaewon had to leave for Hong Kong for a few days to shoot for a brand he was chosen to be the ambassador of. 

“Are you okay, hon? You seem to be out of it these past few days.” Jaewon asks Hanbin who was staring blankly at his food.

“Yeah. Sorry. I’m just tired.”

“Do you want to come with me?”

“There are people I’ve been avoiding that I have to face.” 

“Do you need backup?”

“It’s just Jinhwan and Yunhyeongie. I can handle them.” Hanbin laughs.

“I understand. I’ll come back soon. And then we can start all the wedding planning and preparations.” 

Hanbin smiles and nods.

*later that evening* 

Hanbin drives to Yunhyeong’s restaurant during dinner time and proceeds to Yunhyeong’s office as soon as he arrives. Jinhwan and Chanwoo was there hanging out when he came so it was the perfect time to talk to them.

“Oh. Hanbinnie!” Yunhyeong says as Hanbin opened the door.

Chanwoo gets up from the couch and gives Hanbin a hug. “Chukahae.” He says. Hanbin hugs him back and says thank you. 

Jinhwan was seated at the couch also while Yunhyeong was at his office chair behind his table. Hanbin squeezes in the middle of Jinhwan and Chanwoo in the couch and makes himself comfortable.

“So? What brings you here?” Jinhwan says. Hanbin knew he was upset so he hugs him tight. 

“Forgive me Jinani. Sorry for not answering your calls. I was just overwhelmed with everything that was happening.”

“So it’s really happening huh?” Jinhwan asks.

Hanbin nods.

The boys stay quiet. 

“You think it’s not a good idea?” Hanbin asks innocently. 

“What other people think shouldn’t matter, Hanbinnie.” Chanwoo says.

Hanbin takes Chanwoo’s hand and grips them to say thanks. 

Yunhyeong stands up from his chair and walks towards Hanbin. He kneels down to his level and takes both his hands to his. “I’ll be lying if I told you I’m all for it. But Chanwoo’s right. What we say shouldn’t matter. If you truly love him and if he’s the one you see spending the rest of your life with, I’m happy for you. We’re just worried. We barely know the guy. That’s all.”

“Hanbinnie, you should be with who you should be with.” Jinhwan says.

“Maybe that’s why we’re all in denial that this is happening because nobody really expected it to be Jaewon. “ Chanwoo says. “But this is your life Hanbinnie. Nobody can live it for you. If you’re heart says it’s Jaewon you should be with then it’s Jaewon you should be with.”

They all hug and squish Hanbin in the middle. Hanbin appreciated his friends but he was scared because he was starting to doubt his decision again. 

*the next day*

After Jaewon leaves for the airport, Hanbin goes home to his parents’ house. His mom and dad was at the kitchen having wine while chatting. He goes to join them and catch up.

“Hi stranger.” His mom says as he kissed her in top of her head.  
He takes a wine glass from the cupboard and pours himself some after sitting down across his mom. 

“Where have you been?” his dad asked.

“I dropped Jaewon off the airport and had dinner with the boys.” He answers. “What are you guys talking about?”

“Oh you know, business, Hanbyulie, you.” his moms says.

“What about me?” Hanbin asks curiously. 

“Nothing. We just can’t believe you’re getting married.” His mom says getting emotional.

“I’m gonna ask you guys a question and I need you to answer me honestly okay?”

His parents look at each other and look at Hanbin at the same time. They both nod and anticipate Hanbin’s question.

“Do you think I’m rushing things with Jaewon?” he asks.

His parents look at each other again. 

“Look, I know you have a lot to say about this. And I admire you both for not saying anything about my decision. Thank you for letting me be. But eomma, appa, I need you to tell me if I’m making a huge mistake. Because everyone around me thinks that I am. Junhoe, Jinhwan, Yunhyeongie. They all think it’s not a good idea. I was so sure of Jaewon until they said something. Now I’m confused. I don’t know what to do. I’m scared. Help me.”

His dad takes his hand and calms him down. “Why did you agree to marry him? What made you say yes?” he asked.

Hanbin starts thinking. “He wants me. He makes me feel better. He makes me happy.”

“Baby, marriage isn’t just about happiness.” His mom starts talking. “I’ve been married to your dad for more than 25 years but I can tell you that there were years of unhappiness in between. Marriage is finding a way to be together despite the worst. It is loving and choosing to be together whatever happens. It’s about making mistakes, forgiveness, and learning. It’s a process and it is hard work. It’s something you work hard for every day. It’s fighting the battles together.” His mom takes his other hand. “If you’re ready to go through all that with Jaewon then we don’t have a problem.” 

His mom cups his face with her hand. “My child, your happiness is what matters most. And as much as we want you to just be happy, we have this thing called reality. And in life, reality sucks. We can plan as much as we want but it always gets in the way. Life’s not perfect my love and just because he makes you happy now, that’s all you’re gonna get forever. It’s not. And I’m so sorry that it’s not.”

Hanbin grips both his parents hands and they hold his tightly also. He gets up and stands in between them and hugs them both by his side. 

"Thank you." he says. 

Both his parents get up and hugs him together. 

"Follow this." His dad points to his heart. 

Hanbin nods and hugs them both again. He excuses himself and proceeds to his room. 

*insert texts to jaewon*

“Hi. You busy?” Hanbin asks.

“No. I just got off the shower. What’s up? Are you okay?” Jaewon asks worriedly.

“Can I ask you something?”

“You can ask me anything.”

“Why do you want to marry me?”

“What kind of question is that?”

"I just want to know. What do you see in me?"

"You're kind. You're good to your parents and to your sister. You care about your friends more than you should. You're dedicated to your job. You laugh like a kid. You're everything i've ever dreamed of."

"Is that all?"

"I can write a thousand pages why."

"You're so good to me. Thank you." 

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes. Take care okay? I'll see you in a few days." 

"You too, hon. Sleep well."

After his quick converstation with Jaewon, he lies down in bed and he cries himself to sleep. 

*a few days later*

Bobby comes home to his parents house late at night. He's been keeping himself busy so he spends time in the office more than he should. Once he gets out of his car, he notices a familiar one parked across the street. Junhoe comes out of the car and walks towards Bobby.

“Are you not going to do anything about it?” Junhoe asks straight to the point. He was still in a bad mood because of his conversation with Hanbin.

“What are you talking about?” Bobby was confused.

“We both know he’s making a huge mistake.”

“Junhoe, he’s happy. He wants to do this. Jaewon makes him happy.”

Junhoe punches Bobby in the face making him fall to the ground. Bobby was taken aback. He didn’t understand why Junhoe did that. He gets back up in a rush and pulls Junhoe’s collar. Junhoe pushes him away and Bobby bumps to his car behind him.

“Listen to me.” Junhoe was so pissed. “Stop being a pussy and grow the fuck up. Why do you think he came to you to you before he agreed to get married? He was hoping you’d stop him. He was hoping you’d say don’t marry him. You tell everyone around you, you love him but you never show him you do. You let him go every time. It’s time to stop. Grow some balls and man up. Tell him what you really feel and show him. Wake the fuck up you’re about to lose him for good. Him coming to you was him telling you to take him back. I can’t believe you still don’t get it after all these years.”

Junhoe was on top of Bobby while he spoke. Bobby was leaned back at the trunk of his car. He pushes Junhoe away. His blood was boiling also. “You think I didn’t try?! I did! I fucking did but every time I did there was always something in the way.”

“You call sending flowers trying? Fuck it! What did you do as soon as Jaewon came to the picture? You let him go. And as soon as Hanbin told you he was getting married, you let him go. Again.”

“Why are you even telling me all this? Aren’t you supposed to be celebrating because Hanbin’s finally moving on from me?”

“This is not about me or my happiness. This is about Hanbin.”

Junhoe sits down on the ground by the sidewalk. He has calmed down. Bobby sits beside him after calming down too. 

“What if he doesn’t take me back?”

“You’ll never know unless you try.” 

“Why didn’t I know that was what he meant?”

“Because you’re stupid. But mostly cause you’re scared.”

“I’m scared I’ll hurt him again.” 

“It’s something you can’t avoid. But you can try.”

“Why are you helping me? You’ve hated me ever since I came back”

“I never said I hated you. I just didn’t like you. And I’m helping you because I’m sick of you both running around like kids.”

“Was the punch necessary?” 

“No. I'm just thought it'd help your little brain realize stuff easier.”

Bobby laughs. “That was one hell of a punch. But I’ll let it go. As long as it makes up for leaving you guys 7 years ago.”

Junhoe stands up and offers his hand to Bobby. Bobby smiles and takes Junhoe’s hand. He gets up and he hugs Junhoe suddenly.

“I’m sorry. I never had the chance to apologize to you.”

Junhoe pushes him away. “Ugh get away I‘m allergic to hugs.” He says but Bobby pulls him back for another hug. “Thank you for taking care of him when I couldn’t.” Bobby says before he lets go. 

Bobby smiles at Junhoe and Junhoe smiles back.

“Look, I know you’re scared. Hanbin is too. Very. He needs assurance. Give him that. One of you has to step up and stop being scared. Do it for him. And for you too.” Junhoe says.

Bobby looks down the ground and nods.

“I gotta go. Think about it.” Junhoe says and offers a handshake to Bobby. Bobby looks up and shakes Junhoe’s hand. “Thank you.” he says. Junhoe nods and walks away from Bobby.

15TH UPDATE

*insert bb text to hanbin*

“What are you doing here?” Hanbin asks Bobby as soon as he steps out of the house. 

Bobby was outside his car waiting in the cold. Hanbin walked closer to Bobby and Bobby did the same. After meeting halfway, Bobby wraps his arms around Hanbin and hugs him tight for a few minutes before letting him go.

He stands still in front of Hanbin and says, “I’m here to apologize.”

“I thought we were done with apologies?” Hanbin asked.

“I need you to hear this.” 

Hanbin’s heart beat faster as he waited for Bobby to talk.

“I’m sorry for not telling you how I felt after we made love. I’m sorry for not kissing you back when you kissed me. I’m sorry I waited for you to come to me when it was supposed to be me coming to you. I’m sorry for letting you go the moment I found out about Jaewon. I’m sorry I didn’t stop you when you told me you were getting married. I’m sorry for giving up on us so easily.”

Hanbin was so mad he got tears in his eyes. 

“Is that all?” He asks but he doesn’t wait for Bobby to answer. He turns around and starts to walk away. Bobby grabs his arms and turns him around back to him. Hanbin slaps Bobby in the face hard and walks away again. 

“Don’t marry him.” Bobby says.

Hanbin stops walking but doesn’t turn around.

“Don’t marry him.” Bobby says again. “It’s not him you should be marrying, it’s me. I know it and you know it.” Bobby says with conviction. 

Hanbin turns around and walks back towards Bobby. He slaps him again in the face.

“How dare you?! How dare you tell me all this now! You had your chance. You had years. And now that I decide to be finally happy with someone you come and tell me all of this? You are so unfair! You are so fucking selfish!” Hanbin exclaimed. He was sobbing and so was Bobby.

“Jaewon is a great guy. He makes me feel loved. He makes me feel wanted. All you gave me these past few years was pain and for the first time it’s all starting to go away because of him.” Hanbin adds.

“I was scared! All these years I tried so hard be enough for you. To be perfect for you…”

Hanbin cuts Bobby out. “I never asked you to. All I wanted was to feel like you wanted me still but when you finally did it was too late. Jaewon had already come. I’ve forgotten how great it felt to be wanted but he made realize that again.”  
Hanbin has gotten a little calmer than he was earlier but tears were still flowing from his eyes. “You don’t get to explain yourself now. You had your chance.” 

Hanbin turns around and walks away but this time Bobby doesn’t stop him. He cries harder at each step he took farther away from Bobby.

Bobby was so upset. Not at Hanbin but at himself. He grabs his hair and he pulls them down. He walks to his car and punches his car window. It doesn’t break but he leaves a huge crack on it. His knuckles start to bleed but he doesn’t feel anything. He drops to the ground and he sits down and he cries by himself. 

*different day*

Hanbin always went to Han River. It was some sort of his safe place. He goes there when he wants to think, when he wants to forget, when he’s tired of work, or when he seeks for inspiration. 

One night, he was there alone. He watched the river flow as he sipped coffee. Jaewon wasn’t going to be home until the next day. They haven’t spoken since Bobby’s visit. Hanbin had turned off his phone and told his mom to assure Jaewon everything was fine and that he just needed time to think.

As he was thinking, he hears footsteps walk towards him. He looks behind and sees Chanwoo walking towards him. Chanwoo stands beside him and sips coffee from his hand as well. He looks at Hanbin who was glaring at him. 

“Did Bobby send you?” Hanbin asked.  
Chanwoo shook his head. “He doesn’t know I’m here. I went to your house but you weren’t home. I called Junhoe but he didn’t know either so I figured you were here.”

They could always tell if Chanwoo was lying so Hanbin was sure he was telling the truth. He looks back at the waters without saying another word to Chanwoo.

“How have you been?” Chanwoo asks.

Hanbin releases a deep sigh. “I haven’t been able to write down how I feel. Couldn’t feel worse.”

“You having second thoughts?”

Hanbin takes a while before speaking again. “Jaewon is perfect. Everything about him is perfect. Our relationship is perfect. Everything is how I imagined love to look like when I was younger; just like the movies.”

“That’s good I guess?” Chanwoo asks.

Hanbin looks at him and gives him a sad smile. “Yeah.” He tells him. 

Chanwoo knew he was lying. Hehugs Hanbin from the side. Hanbin takes the hug and leans at him. 

“Can you promise me one thing, Hanbinnie?” Chanwoo asked.

“What is it?”

“If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, don’t be afraid to leave. Okay?”

Hanbin takes in what Chanwoo said and nods. 

*insert texts*

What time do u land  
Ok ill meet u at home

Hanbin has been thinking long and hard about his engagement but he still hasn’t found an answer. He drives to Jaewon’s pad not knowing what to say to Jaewon but he knows he owns him an explanation for being MIA for days. 

Jaewon was in the kitchen preparing dinner when he arrives. 

“Hi.” Hanbin says.

Jaewon looks up from setting the plates. “Hi.”

The atmosphere was silent and a bit awkward.

“Sit down. I just finished making dinner.”  
Hanbin takes a seat and Jaewon serves the pasta he just made.

He sits down across Hanbin and Hanbin takes his hand immediately.

Jaewon was nervous. He had an idea what was about to come but he hoped it wasn’t what he was thinking.

“Can we talk?” Hanbin asks.

“Of course.” Jaewon responds.

“In the room?”

Jaewon nods and gets up from his chair. Hanbin follows and they both walk to the bedroom.

Hanbin sits at the edge of the bed while Jaewon stood still in front of him.

“Do you think you can give me time?” Hanbin asks.

“Time for what?”

“To think about all of this?” Hanbin breathes in and out. “Don’t you think we’re rushing?”

“You’re having doubts?” Jaewon asks but he wasn’t mad.

“No. I don’t know. It’s just that we haven’t been together long and there still so much to know about each other and I’m scared there might be things you won’t like about me or…”

Jaewon kneels down the ground and takes Hanbin’s hands in his. He kisses them and he says, “I’ve never been sure of any decision I made in my life but this. You can turn into a chick at night and I’d still love you. Hanbin, I was serious when I told you you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’m serious about marrying you. But if you don’t feel the same way… tell me.”

Hanbin starts crying. 

“The reason I don’t want to wait anymore because I see no point of it. I imagine my life 10 years from now and I see myself sitting at my porch in my house in Jeju watching the sunset and do you know who I see myself with? You.”

“I just need more time.” Hanbin says as he sobbed.

“Baby look at me.” Jaewon says as he lifted Hanbin’s chin up. “If you were sure of me you wouldn’t need time to think about it. But it’s okay that you do. I’m just sorry too because I know what I want and I know what I need. I’m sorry because it’s not what you’re willing to give.”

Hanbin couldn’t say anything but cry. He was embarrassed and ashamed. Jaewon was nothing but good to him and he didn’t deserve any of this.

Jaewon sits beside Hanbin by the bed and takes him in his arms. Hanbin leans at his chest while he cried.

“This sounds cliché but the moment I met you, but I fell in love with you. Instantly. And when I got to know you and your story, I fell in love with you even more. Even when I knew there was someone else in your heart. When I asked you to be my boyfriend and you said yes, it was one of the happiest days of my life. I didn’t sleep for days. And when I asked you to marry me, I wasn’t expecting you to say yes. It was a gamble for me. It was either you say yes or you leave me. But you said yes and I thought that maybe you really are over him. My heart was about to burst of happiness. From that day, I’ve been looking forward to spending my life with you. But when you asked for time while I was away, I already knew I was going to lose you." 

"But honey, it’s not your fault. It’s my fault for expecting too much. You were broken and I took advantage. I got selfish with you. I knew I wanted you and only you and it’s my fault for thinking you wanted me too.”

“I do want you.” Hanbin says.

“But you want him too.” Jaewon’s voice cracked as he shed tears while he spoke.

Hanbin felt so sorry. His heart was breaking for Jaewon. He felt so guilty. 

“I may be prince charming..” Jaewon says and giggles in the middle of his tears. Hanbin lets out a subtle laugh as well. “But what you need is a knight in shining armor. I’m sorry I couldn’t be both.”

Hanbin hushes Jaewon and hugs him. He hugs him to show how grateful he is to have met him but most of all he hugs him to show how sorry he is. They both cry in each other’s arms.

*after a few days*

Hanbin had just finished taking all his things from Jaewon and was moving them back to his room in his parent’s house. 

Jaewon had left the country a few days after calling off the engagement. 

Hanbin was clearing out his clothes’ pockets before placing them in the laundry basket. As he was going through a coat, he notices a piece of paper that was folded. He opens it and sees a familiar handwriting. It was Bobby’s. he wondered how the letter got there and then he remembered it was the coat he wore when Chanwoo came to him at Han River. He shakes his head at how cheeky Chanwoo got and reads the letter.

“I never got to say everything I wanted to say when I last spoke to you. You may or may not read this but I’ll still try. 

Kim Hanbin, I’ve said sorry to you more than one person should but I don’t regret any of it. I meant it every time I said it and I mean it now. I’m sorry. But most of all, I’m sorry for giving up on us when you never did. Insecurity got to me. I thought you’d be better off with someone else than me. I’m sorry it had to take this long for me to figure out you weren’t asking for anyone else but me.

You loved me the first time I told you I loved you. You loved me all through the years of our relationship. You loved me even after I left you. You loved me when I was in love with someone else. And you grew to love me again even after years of not seeing each other. How stupid was I to not realize that? I’ve been so hard on myself thinking you don’t deserve a guy like me. Maybe you don’t. Maybe you really do deserve better. 

But Kim Hanbin, I love you too. I loved you the first time you took my hand to hold when you got scared of the movie we were watching when we were thirteen. I loved you every time you kissed me secretly when I was pretending to be asleep when we were together. I loved you more after leaving you. And even when I was in love with someone else I still loved you. I loved you the time you went away and I loved you the first time I saw you after you came back. I loved you at every moment of every day. Together or not, it was always you. 

You’re right when you said all I ever brought you was pain. I’m writing this not to say goodbye again but to ask for a chance to change that. I want to be the one to take away the pain I caused you. I want to be the one to make you better. I want to be the one to love you and hold you for the rest of your life. I want you and only you. 

What we had was no fairy tale. It was far from perfect. But it was real; you and i. 

I want to make it up to you.

I’m going to make it up to you.

Jiwon.

Hanbin gets up from his bedroom floor and takes his car keys. He was feeling all sorts of things. He was mad, happy, but most of all, sad. He wipes away the tears falling from his eyes as he walked out of the house. He turns on his car and drives to Bobby’s house. 

He rings the bell and waits for someone to let him in. Bobby was surprised to see Hanbin standing outside his door. Nobody knew about Jaewon yet including Bobby. He rushes outside to greet Hanbin and welcomes him in. Hanbin enters the house and stands by the living room. Bobby notices Hanbin has just been crying. He walks towards him and he takes his hands. 

“What’s wrong? What happened?” He asked worriedly.

Hanbin raises his hand and shows an empty ring finger. “We called it off.” He says. “What now? What do we do now?” He asked as tears fell down his face. 

Bobby notices and as soon as he does he crashes his lips to Hanbin’s.

Hanbin takes Bobby’s kiss immediately and he wraps hi arms around Bobby’s neck.

Bobby carries Hanbin up and Hanbin hooks his legs around his waist. He walks forward and crashes Hanbin’s back to the wall without breaking the kiss. Hanbin groans and goes back to kissing Bobby. He walked towards his bedroom with Hanbin in his arms bumping into every wall they walked into. Bobby opens his bedroom door and walked towards the bed. He drops Hanbin down and he takes off his shirt. Hanbin takes off his shirt too and Bobby climbs on top of him. His knees were in between Hanbin’s thighs. He stroked Hanbin’s hair, looked him in the eye, and went back to kissing him. They rolled their tongues over each other making each other feel how much they want one another. They both moaned at how good they both tasted to each other. Bobby takes his kisses down to Hanbin’s neck as Hanbin tilted his head up. 

His kisses went lower and lower and when he reaches Hanbin’s abdomen, he slowly unbuttons Hanbin’s pants. Hanbin tilts his lower body up as Bobby pulled his pants down. Bobby unbuttons his pants as well and he takes them off. He climbs back on top of Hanbin and kisses him on the lips again. Hanbin kisses back Bobby and as they massages their tongues together, Hanbin gets up until he’s seated on the bed while Bobby was kneeling. He pushes Bobby gently down until Bobby’s back was on the soft mattress. Hanbin, now on top of Bobby, continues to kiss Bobby passionately. He takes his kisses down to Bobby’s chest and lower to Bobby’s pelvic bone. He leaves small marks of kisses around Bobby’s dick before taking it in his mouth. Hanbin is knelt down in between Bobby’s legs with Bobby’s hard on his hand. 

He takes his dick in his mouth and he swirls his tongue around the tip. Bobby moans and as Hanbin took his dick inside his mouth, he moaned harder. Hanbin made eye contact as his lips worked their way up and down Bobby’s dick. Bobby tilted his head up as he felt his member inside Hanbin’s mouth. He takes a handful of Hanbin’s hair and assisted him as Hanbin hallowed his cheeks.

He used his lips and hands together and worked them up and down his huge member as he finishes up with Bobby. Hanbin takes Bobby deep to his throat before letting go. Bobby groans and how good it felt. He gets up and and assists Hanbin’s back to the bed. He caresses Hanbin’s body with his hands and he takes his waist and grips them on both sides. He pulls Hanbin up from his waist and he turns him around. Hanbin is now faced to the bed. Bobby takes his hands to Hanbin’s waist again and brings his bottom up to his pelvis. Hanbin feels Bobby’s hard on from behind. Bobby rubs his hard on Hanbin’s behind a couple times before entering him. Hanbin grunted as Bobby pushed himself in and once he was gully inside, they both release a satisfied moan at the same time. 

Bobby rocks inside Hanbin a couple times before taking his back up to his body. Hanbin wraps one of his arm behind Bobby’s neck as Bobby pounded him from behind. Hanbin felt so good and so tight. Bobby bites Hanbin’s shoulder and Hanbin groans. Bobby was starting to moan a mixture of curse words and Hanbin’s name. He takes Hanbin back to his old position and fucked him harder. Hanbin takes a pillow and bites into it. Hanbin’s vision was fading into black as he was about to come. Bobby rocks faster and just as he was about to come he pulls out of Hanbin and jerks off until he releases them all. They both moan and pant at the same time. Bobby pulls the towel hanging at the edge of his bed and wipes away his excess from Hanbin’s back. Hanbin lies down the bed and Bobby lies beside him still panting. 

They fall asleep for a few minutes in each other’s arms until Hanbin wakes up. He watched Bobby sleep beside him and kisses him softly on the lips. “I love you.” He whispers and he buries himself back into Bobby’s chest. “I love you too, baby.” Bobby answers. Hanbin looks up to Bobby startled not knowing he was up. Bobby smiles and kisses Hanbin’s forehead. 

“I won’t make you regret taing me back.” He promises Hanbin.

“Who says I’ve taken you back?” Hanbin teases.

“Oh you haven’t?” Bobby asks and starts tickling Hanbin’s body. 

“Stop!! Okay, okay. I take you back.” Hanbin begged as he shook his body away from Bobby’s hands.

Bobby stops with the tickling. He takes his elbow to the bed and he rests his head on his hand. He stares at Hanbin who was lying down flat on the bed. He brushes away Hanbin’s hair away from his face and the smiles on their faces start to disappear. 

“Do you think we’re going to be okay?” Hanbin asks. 

Bobby stroked Hanbin’s hair and says, “We’re going to be fine as long as we have each other. I promise.”

Hanbin nods. And just like that, he trusts Bobby again.

“Stay the night.” Bobby asks.

“I can’t I have a schedule this morning. And your parents are here.” Hanbin tells him.

“They’re not. They’re in China.”

“I still can’t. I have to work.”

Bobby nods. “Okay.” He says sadly. “Can I see you after work tomorrow? We can grab dinner maybe?”

Hanbin reaches out to Bobby’s lips and kisses them. “I’d love to.” 

They cuddle for a few more minutes before Bobby drives Hanbin home.

*a few hours later*  
*inset bb texts to hb*

Hanbin rushes out of the house excitedly. He runs to the car parked outside and Bobby opens the window door.

“What are you doing here?” Hanbin asks enthusiastically.

“I missed you.” Bobby says all smiles.

“It’s literally just been hours since we parted ways.” Hanbin says.

“Why? Can’t I miss my boyfriend?” Bobby glares.

Hanbin’s face lights up. “What did you call me?” he asks again even though he heard it the first time.

“Boyfriend.”

“Sounds nice. I like it.” He says with a huge smile on his face.

“Well boyfriend get in because you’re going to be late.” 

Hanbin rushes inside the car and gives Bobby a kiss on the lips. "There’s coffee there and there’s a paper bag at the bag. Eat.”

Hanbin takes the bag from the back seat and takes a sandwich from inside. He bites into it and he lets Bobby bite too. 

They drive happily until they reach they’re destination. 

“Text me in between breaks okay?” Bobby asks.

“I will boyfriend.” Hanbin says and smiles hugely again. He couldn’t hide how much he loves it. “Bye.”

Hanbin opens the car door but before he could get out Bobby pulls him back. “Hey come here.” He says and he kisses him on the lips for a solid five seconds. He pulls away and looks at Hanbin in the eye. “I love you. So damn much.”

“I love you too bub. More than you’ll ever know.” Hanbin leaves as soft kiss on Bobby’s lips before getting off the car. “I’ll see you later.” He shouts out before Bobby drives away.

*later that day*

Bobby picks Hanbin up from the same place and they both drive to their favourite steak house in Jongnu-gu. 

Bobby had already reserved a table for two. As the waiter walked them to their table, they both notice a familiar face about to leave the restaurant. Hanbin stared closely and his eyes widen when he realizes it was Junhoe, holding hands with who seems to be a boyfriend. 

Junhoe notices Bobby and Hanbin and stops walking. Hanbin and Bobby walked towards him and the guy he was with.  
Junhoe lets go of the hand of the guy he was with and shakes Bobby’s hand as soon as they reach each other. Hanbin was shocked to see them greeting each other. It was the first time in years. Bobby hugs Junhoe and says “Thank you.”

“Don’t mess it up this time.” Junhoe says.

“I promise.” Bobby assures him.

“Okay what’s happening?” Hanbin was lost.

Junhoe and Bobby ignores Hanbin. 

“Oh. I’m sorry I was rude. This is Daniel. Daniel, this is Hanbin and Bobby.” Junhoe introduces them to each other.

“Hi. I’m Kang Daniel. I’ve heard so much about you guys.” Daniel says as they shake hands.

“I wish I could say the same.” Hanbin says jokingly. 

“Well, we gotta go.” Junhoe says. “Enjoy your dinner.”

They say there farewells and Hanbin and Bobby proceed to have dinner.

*insert hb text jh*

Bobby switches his plate with Hanbin after slicing up the meat. Hanbin says thanks and starts eating peacefully. 

"Will you sleepover at my place later? Bobby asks. 

"I can't babe i'm meeting up with my other boyfriend."

Bobby glares at Hanbin and Hanbin laughs. "I'm meeting up with Junhoe. We both have a lot of explaining to do."

Bobby pouts. "You'd rather spend time with Junhoe than me?"

"Baaaabe we're just gonna talk."

Bobby laughs. "I'm kidding! Of course you can go."

"Wait, how are you friends again? What happened?" Hanbin asks curiosly. 

"If you guys have secrets, we have them too." 

"Fine."

Bobby laughs. Hanbin continued to munch on the steak and he catches Bobby staring at him. 

"What?"

"Nothing. I just missed you. Like really really missed you. You have no idea how hard it was to stop myself from getting close to you and hugging you every time we're in the same room." 

"I felt the same way." Hanbin says. 

Bobby takes Hanbin's hand on top of the table and holds it. 

"Thank you for coming back. Thank you for taking me back."

"There's nowhere else i'd rather be." Hanbin says sincerely. 

After they finish dinner, Hanbin calls Junhoe and Bobby drops him off at Han River. 

 

Hanbin finds Junhoe waiting for him at their usual spot when he arrives. Junhoe had a cup of coffee in his hand and his phone at the other. Hanbin stared at Junhoe for a while and he smiles at the sight of Junhoe smiling. 

He runs to him excitedly and Junhoe hides his phone in his pocket as soon as he sees Hanbin. He gets up from the bench and he rubs Hanbin’s head. “You’re pretty happy today.” He says.

“I have you to thank for that.” Hanbin says. “Sooo, who is Daniel? I mean he’s Kang Daniel but who is he in your life” Hanbin asked cheekishly. Kang Daniel was a rookie actor who was starting to get known on the industry.

“Someone I’ve been dating.” Junhoe answers uninterestedly. 

“Been dating?! So it’s been a while?”

“Over a year.”

“WHAT? And I didn’t know?!”

“You never asked.” Junhoe says and this shuts Hanbin up.

Hanbin frowns. “I’m such a bad friend.”

Junhoe laughs and pinches Hanbin’s nose. “You’re not. We’re just really private. You how the industry works. Sorry I didn’t tell you.” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t ask.” Hanbin says shyly.

“It’s okay dummy. So, everything good with Bobby?”

Hanbin nods. “We’re still talking about stuff. We’re taking it slow this time.”

“How do you feel?”

“Happy. And sad.”

“Why sad?”

“We wasted a lot of time apart. I wished we could’ve figured each other out earlier.”

“Hey, stop living the past. It’s done. You have so much to look forward to.”

Hanbin hugs Junhoe all of a sudden. “I don’t know how to thank you enough. I don’t know how to make it up to you. I know you barely ask but if you need anything please tell me.”

Junhoe hugs Hanbin back and laughs. “I’m not asking for anything in return.”

“Just, please? Let me be there for you as how you were there for me.”

Junhoe kisses the top of Hanbin’s head and nods. “Alright, kid. I promise.”

Junhoe filled Hanbin in about his relationship and Hanbin was so happy to hear everything about it. He’s been praying for Junhoe to find someone who’ll take care of him not knowing his prayer was answered a long time ago. They spend the whole night walking around and chatting. It was the first time in a while they hung out where nobody cried and just talk about the joys of life. 

They finished chatting a little after sunrise. Hanbin decided to go home at Bobby's place so Junhoe drops him off there. 

Hanbin rings the doorbell hoping Bobby would wake up and open it. He hears someone open the door and to his surprise it was Bobby's mom. 

"Hanbin ah?" His mom asked. 

"Annyeong emmonim." Hanbin greets her and gives her a hug and receives a hug back. "I thought you were in China?" Hanbin asked. 

"We arrived late last night. Jiwon's still asleep. Come inside. Have breakfast with your dad and I." 

Hanbin happily obliged and have dinner with Bobby's parents. They were more than thrilled to find out that they have gotten back together. 

Hanbin hasn't told his mom yet but Bobby's mom got too excited and called her to tell her. His mom screamed over the phone also so thrilled to hear the news. 

After a lot of catching up, Hanbin excuses himself for he was already sleepy. He leaves Bobby's parents at the kitchen and as he was walking away, Bobby's dad smiles widely. "They all go back to where they belong." He says.  



End file.
